June 28, 2024
Weather Woes
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Are you prepared for the unexpected or do you ignore the tornado warnings like Lisa? Sam experienced weather woes; panic bought tea lights and almost packed a to-go bag. Have you ever pondered the unwritten rules of lawn mowing noise etiquette? Is Knotty Knickers an appropriate name for menopausal sleepwear? Is Croc patio furniture taking this weird trend too far? Do you hate those awkward line conversations at the doctor's office? Did you love or hate boxed pizza as a kid? Is KD and hotdogs a lake food staple for everyone? Is flashing your breasts in public a vote for feminism or a cry for attention? Tune in for all this and more as we shake our heads at life's quirky, frustrating and endlessly amusing moments.
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Transcript
Remember those pants, those green pants I bought last year, but I didn't wear them for a year? I'm wearing them this year. Remember those pants, Samantha? Seriously? Seriously. But there's a problem with them.
No. Uh-uh. We need to stop. What? Because you gave me such a hard
time because
you said you made me buy green pants, and I've never worn those green pants. You're now wearing them? This year. Took me a year. Took me a year because
I needed I needed another pant in my life. And there they were hanging in my closet. So I thought, okay, let's do it. I'll wear green pants and a black shirt on top. So that's what I do. But here's the it's not about the pant. The problem is is that the pant, it's it's not constructed right. Somebody didn't make it properly.
It's twisty.
It could be a you thing.
How is it a me thing? I'm not built twisty.
Okay. So this is the woman who rolls her pants three times?
Because I'm short in the rise. If I don't Yes. I am.
No. You're not.
Yes. I'm if I don't roll the
You just don't want the waist to
go up over your belly.
I don't want her on my belly.
That's not true. So it sits underneath your belly. That's not true. Because that's where your waist is, underneath your belly. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. I'm short in the rise which means No, ma'am.
That's come up too high. I'm not tucking them. I'm not wearing pants up to my boobs. It seems weird. That's so then I have to roll them.
Oh, my god.
Why do you think Why are you making fun of my crotch?
No. Because you're making the pant the problem when the problem
is clearly you. That's the problem. The pant the pant is not strong. Made them wrong. They don't line up with my ass. They don't line
up with the middle of my ass. Because it doesn't know where to go because you have no ass.
I have an ass, but it's not just me. It's not twisting. Where am I going?
Is it left? Is it right? I don't know where to go. Like, it's just,
this is not my problem. This is totally not my problem. And then, you know what? I then I wear these pants all day, and they're twisty, and they're uncomfortable, and it's awkward. And you know how many people watch me walk away, and not one person ever said, hey, Lisa. You notice your pants are twisty? Hey, Lisa. Pull up your pants. Not pull off my pants. Pull them off my pants.
It's not about that. Yes. It is. It's not because they're rolled.
Yes. It is. Totally because you're rolling your pants.
But how how do you fix that? I can't fix my crotch. I'm 55 years old. That's my crotch. It's short. Why are you shaming my crotch? I fucked. Just sounds like you might be.
Welcome to another episode of I shake My Head with Lisa and Sam.
Hello, friends of the podcast. Hello, everybody. Samantha, have you ever noticed I always look up?
I'm not sure why, but you do.
That's weird. Hey. Like, I'm doing it right now as I talk. Like, so I see you, but look at I'm, like, looking way up. And I don't know why. I don't know why.
I always thought your monitor was
high. Like like 6 feet high? It's not. It's as it's it's as high as anybody's monitor.
Uh-huh. Okay.
But that's just my habit is to look up. Uh-huh. Look up. Look way up. Must have been my friendly giant years. Right? And I'll call Rusty. Right?
Uh-huh. Yep.
Oh, the friendly giant. Nothing better than a Canadian TV show in the seventies made for kids that was 15 minutes long only.
Was that really only 15
minutes long? 15 minutes. Aw. Think of all the things he did. Right? They played a song. The mice the 3 blind mice came out. Aw. Rusty came out. Yeah.
Rome came out. He read a book, and you curled up for 2 people in the chair, lowered the drawbridge, raised the drawbridge, and off you went, kids. Go about your day. Mister dress up's waiting for you now.
Oh my god. Right?
That was Canadian TV.
Oh, we love that.
Yeah. Right? And I'm sure parents are like, only 15 minutes for real? Right? Okay. Not friendly giant, you don't got another story in you? There's not a second story in you? Like, a second song or something? Nothing.
Hopefully, doctor Dressup is on his game. Mister mister Dressup? Oh, sorry. Mister Dressup.
That's how it went in my life. It went the front so it went this is this was the morning setup before when we were kids. Right? Gen x kids. Right? Before we really went to school, it went the polka dot door. Right? We did the polka dot door, romper room. Oh, yeah. The friendly giant, Mr. Dress up, Sesame Street.
That's enough TV for now, kids. It's lunch. I'm pretty sure that's how it went.
Oh, gosh. Sesame Street.
Sesame Street. Right? Still on today, Sesame Street.
I know.
Right? Okay. So in my spare time, scrolling through my Instagram today, I stopped dead. I mean, dead in my tracks, Samantha. Do you know why? I feel this is just I I don't wanna make it a nice shake my head but I apparently am shaking my head. They have patio furniture that looks like it's been made from Crocs. Like the shoe? Yeah. So the recliner is, like, in the shape of a croc. The pattern of it is poke like, is poke it out at like a croc.
It looks like crocs in a patio furniture set. And I'm like, somebody's gotta be that.
Like like, are you kidding me? That has got to be, 1, if it gets hot, that is like, you're gonna sizzle yourself.
Right. You're gonna stick to it. That's nice.
Potentially, it could melt. I mean
and you're realistically, imagine your tan lines on that, like, polka dot tan, the polka dot tan. Right?
I oh my god. You know, I get that people think Crocs are the best, and they have made a variety of weird shoes. Nobody hates Crocs more than me and you. I just don't understand why they love them so much.
And I think I hate the patio furniture almost more than shoes, And I didn't even think that was possible. Oh my god. I don't even care that people are gonna be, like, adding us saying, we love Crocs. Yeah. That's fine. Wear them. Wear them. I'm not telling you not to wear them.
No. Lisa and Sam are just saying, thumbs down to Crocs. Thumbs down
to Crocs and things made out of Crocs. Right? And plastic shoes.
I felt back in the eighties, I didn't like the jellies either.
No. I never wore jelly.
Never wore jelly either. Right? That's
where we would've been compatible in the
in our younger years. I'm not wearing that shoe. No. I'm not wearing that
shoe. That shoe.
Ever. No. Never. If you can bend a shoe and twist it, I don't think it should be a shoe.
I think everyone wore the black Mary Jane kinda type shoe.
Yeah. And remember, like, remember the wicker shoe? Yes. That was a big one.
I was really more into running shoes. And then in the summer, it was like a flip flop. I lived in my flip flops.
I always liked like, in high school and stuff, I was always, like, like a loafer.
Well, I was Of course, you were Ronald Reagan junior. Right? I liked a loafer. I
liked a good loafer back in the day. So I'm just saying, right, like, we do not need croc like patio furniture.
No. No. We don't. There's a variety of things that we could have patio furniture made out of. That should not be one of them.
Friends of the podcast, you're gonna wanna check our Instagram stories to see the pictures of them because I got the pictures. Right? I took I I I screenshotted that shit because I'm like, nowhere. Thank god.
Thank god.
K. So Saturday. Right? I need to get prescriptions filled. My doctor's going away. I get the same prescription Samantha done for the last 5 years. No change. Mhmm. They won't do it over the phone because I have chronic disease management.
Like, wait a like, that's a shame. Oh, yeah. Oh, this is your this is what they call this is your CDB your CDM visit. I'm like, can I just ask what that stands for? Yeah. Chronic disease management. You have chronic disease, and we're trying to manage it. I thank you for breaking it down. I understand the I understand the term, not an idiot.
Right? Oh my god. So because I'm because they're trying to manage my chronic disease, which I guess is my heart, they won't just give me the prescription one time over the phone. So then I gotta go Of course not. I gotta go to their walk in clinic. So Saturday morning, I'm like, okay. Early bird gets the worm. Right? I'm that girl.
Uh-huh.
Get up at the crack of dawn. They open at 10. I'm there at 9:30 in my car waiting in a full parking lot full of people. Oh. Trying because everybody probably had the world must have chronic disease management problems. I don't know or something. Here's the thing. Right? You're waiting, and then all of a sudden, one brave person decides it's time to take this to the door.
Oh. Right? So quarter to 9, somebody opens the door and they go to they open their car door and they go to the door door right up the of the building. And then it's like a swarm. Right? Oh, is that because now the now the lineup's forming.
I'm gonna be 10. You're gonna be 9. Right. Number's gonna be 8. Right. No. I can't be 12.
You can't be 12. And then you know what happens as you're in your lineup because you're trying to get, like, are you trying to get a spot in line? Because, you know, once you get in the door, that lineup is still you you you're totally branded by that.
Uh-huh.
Then all the awkward looks and the awkward conversation starts.
Oh, god. Yeah. So this
is what you hear. Oh, it's not very nice out today, is it? No. No. And then some guy, he's a farmer and he's like, yeah. But it's good for rain's good for the farm. Oh, where about do you farm? Who fucking cares? I don't who cares? So what's your girl do? She puts on her mad face and she's just scrolling at her phone right with her their mad face on. I don't don't talk to me.
Don't look at me.
No. Don't ask me for the weather. Don't ask me. I don't care. I'm number 6 in line, and I'm not talking to anybody. I'm not talking to 5 or 7. Not doing it. Right? They're talking around me, over top of me.
That's fine. Feel fine. Yep. I am not doing this.
Awkward. Awkward lines. Awkward lines. Right? Awkward line.
And then when you get inside and you're in the waiting room, I get we're not at COVID times anymore. Like, I get it's still out there, but whatever. Right? So people aren't necessarily wearing masks, which is perfectly fine. However, if you do go to the doctors, dear people, if you go to the doctors and you're sneezy and you're coffee and you're phlegmy Oh. You should just put one on. At least there is a sign of respect. Just a fucking respect mask. How about that? Right? I'm just here for my prescriptions.
Uh-huh. Yeah. I you're not there to catch a disease.
Not there to catch a disease or have make new friends. I just want my pills, and I just wanna go home. That's it.
Oh my god. That's a good I shake my head, actually.
Right? Just bitching to bitch.
Well, that's a pretty good one.
Yeah. Right? I was just frustrated. Hey.
Well, you know, I okay. So Friday, you know, I got my haircut, you know, looking pretty.
Who's a pretty girl?
Who's a pretty girl? And then, you know, we started I went I watched the Oilers game. Like, I am not watching the final. I'm not watching the Stanley Cup. Right. But our friend, HHT about sports? No. And our friend, HHG invited us over. I'm like, what?
Our friendship has totally gone in a whole new direction, hey. Totally different direction. So, I
mean, of
course, I'm gonna go over. So we watched the game. We got excited. They won, and I
thought, well, okay. Here I am. I'm watching the game. And all I thought was after game 6, all I thought was there's a lot of babies being made that night.
Canadian babies being made. Lot of babies Right. The same birthday. The population of Edmonton just quadrupled because the Oilers won game 6. Right? So just doubled in size. Just settled in size,
and then and then we lost.
And then we lost in the final.
And then we lost in the final on Monday.
So now all those people that made babies 2 nights earlier, they're wishing they were not making sweet love. No. What? What? Now you got a baby. Now you got a baby. Wait a minute. Coming. Right? You own that for the rest of your life.
That's all that's happening when people are out there getting drunk and partying, and they're hanging out.
You're gonna make this easy.
Go and have some fun, and we're taking it to the next level.
Taking it to the next level. Right? That's all that's happening. Right? Walking everybody's walking away with every 2 people are walking away with a baby. Right? But isn't it weird that she told me like, friends of the podcast, you know the HHG. Right? She private. She private.
She private.
Isn't it? It was like like and the spread she put on.
Oh my god. I'm like, you need to invite us over more often.
Yeah. Like, every day after supper. Every day after work sounds good. Right?
She had snacks. She had my favorite drink, your favorite. Well, you have wine, so that's always your favorite drink. She had hot dogs, which were the Costco hot dogs.
Right? She had all the toppings. She all the
toppings. Chicken. Chili.
S'mores. With s'mores.
She had wings.
She had wings. It was a crazy
That cornhole? Yeah. Oh, my God. Cornhole. Lisa.
Right? The ringer. Who has who has a talent nobody knew about? This girl. That and Euker. Oh my god. Right? Give me a give me a sport I've never played very much. Chances are I'm gonna be a superstar.
I feel like cornhole should go should be at every party because fun. It is so fun because you're, like, so excited when you get a hole in 1.
Right? It's the best game Cornhole is. Like, that was so fun.
Oh, so simple, but, yes, so fun. And you
know, it's so weird. Like, when I think back, I just think back. Isn't it odd that now I know where the HHG lives and have been in her home, yet have not been invited to yours.
And you know what? It'll stay a mystery for just a little bit longer.
It's still just weird. Right? It's still just a weird thing about our friendship. Did you used did you used to know where she lived? Yeah, totally.
No, you didn't.
New places before I did. I used to even go over there. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Not now. I'm like, I don't know. Apparently, not now. Apparently, not now.
But maybe now Michelle's will be the meeting place.
Well, it's beautiful. She's done good. She did good. Our girl did good. Our girl did good.
It was pretty good.
Lots of fun. Not mind. It was lots of fun.
Totally. Okay. But I do also need to mention, in the world of pop culture, because you know I'm paying attention.
Yeah. To that, you are. Mhmm.
Apparently, Travis Kelsey was on stage with our girl, Taylor Swift, in London.
Guess what? She's not our girl anymore. I'm over them. I'm done with them. No. I'm over it. I'm over it. Like, just get engaged, get married, and move on.
Aw, that's not very nice. I don't
need to see like, why is he on stage?
He was part of the whole show.
Somebody phoned in somebody phoned in sick, and they needed another male backup dancer. Right? They couldn't get a hold of somebody for the
last minute. I thought it was perfect because isn't her ex from London, Joe Alwyn Alwyn?
Oh, of course. There has to be some dark, deep, hidden meaning foot.
That's oh, I'm sure the Swifties are all over it, and I'm only scratching the surface of all the conspiracy theories.
I'm not a true Swifty. Right? This is true. I like the HHG who is the true Swifty.
Oh my god. And we watched the heiress tour after the 6th game.
But we needed to. Right? Because we were hurting her feelings. She had just entertained us, and then we were hurting her feelings. Do you wanna watch a movie? No. No. That's not
with you. You're like, I don't wanna watch a movie.
Like, I don't wanna watch a movie.
Because you don't watch movies because you're mister you're like, if it's not news, I'm not learning anything.
I'm not learning it. Right? And if it's
not true crime and a serial killer, I have no interest.
Nobody's getting killed and slaughtered and dismembered and snacked on. Keep that shit away. I'm not I don't care.
Yeah. So then so then she turned on the I enjoyed it. She turned on the concert.
Right. Right. Let's let's watch Taylor Swift.
Michelle and I were having a great time singing all the songs. I
too funny. Too funny. Too funny.
It was fun. It was a good time.
It was. It totally was. But we do
have a vacation coming up. And this year, I think you need to try and cooperate a bit more.
I don't think I'm the problem. Oh, I think you oh, I'm not the problem. Oh, I think
you are. No. You're the problem.
You're the problem every year. Every year, I walk away thinking, I wish Sam would cooperate a little bit more.
Oh my god.
Every year, I think it's you.
And the lightning bolt has not struck her dead yet, folks.
Right. Oh my god. Because I'm not I'm not too far off.
You are the you are the worst. You do not cooperate.
How do I not cooperate?
If you don't get your way, you stomp away like a 5 year old child, and then you're one one no away from having a freak a freak out. Listen. Temper tantrum.
I have grocery standards. So I You have you
have you have unrealistic grocery standards.
It is not unrealistic to ask for me to buy I wanna buy bread that's not going to expire tomorrow. And you have an issue with that every it's good till tomorrow, and it's till tomorrow, and then we have no bread again. No.
But we never find the right dates. We're always, like, one day short of, like, having food that we can eat.
But the problem is is that I feel it's like it's like like, Mike has come so far on his dates. Right? I feel you have not evolved that well with me in this process. Like, dates are so important to pay attention to. You have ADHD around dates. Right? Like like, when I we buy a potato salad, we need to check that date to make sure
I checked that
date. Into the time frame.
No. But you the the thing is when we get there, you are not you do not understand. There is nowhere else to buy food. Yeah. I know. You gotta settle for what's there.
Mhmm.
And you still raise a stink.
I'm not because I'm not a settler. I'm not just gonna settle for
Do you remember what happened when we went to the superstore? No.
I left it. I faked an emergency and left.
It was horrible. No.
Not on my dime in my purse.
I was so embarrassed. It was horrible.
Knew. You were just embarrassing. You were horrible. You wanted to buy everything that was about to expire. And I'm like, no. That no. Because we want we're allowed to have good things too, you know? Oh, okay. Alright.
Like, yeah, we can just buy a loaf of, like, wonder bread, but that doesn't seem like a vacation. I'm not buying white bread. Well, and here we go. Right? And here we go. Excuse me. And we don't buy white bread. We get whole wheat everything for you. So don't say I don't cooperate.
No. We buy your white dinner buns that you like for sandwiches.
But I've always said I can't tell the difference.
I feel like we need to elevate our game, though, because Michelle's coming. I feel like our peasant ways are not
going to go well. But you know what the thing is? She's a better person than us because she would never comment.
No. We don't comment.
We we we we think it. We would think it. It? You would think it. Oh, just only I wear judgment pants? I don't think so. I think yours are pulled up higher than mine. Remember I have a small crotch?
Oh, that's right. You do have a small crotch. Okay. But speaking of food for the lake.
Yeah. Let's do Hello craft dinner. Oh, craft dinner No. Nurse. Yeah. No. Why can't we have something I'd like to have? Because you never eat it. I always eat the craft dinner except for when and when you make it bad.
I make it bad.
The little microwavable craft dinners. Mm-mm.
It doesn't taste the same.
How does it not taste the same? Better from a box
with tender loving care. A little bit of margarine, little bit of butt prop member, just a little bits little bit, Samantha. That's your job. Right? That's fine. You just have to boil the water. That's fine. Because I don't have the patience for that either. But I'm just saying.
Right? And then cut up the wieners in it. Let's have that every day. No. Let's just go cheap. No. Well, we have to remember the price of groceries.
Okay. So if we're gonna have wieners, I need the Costco hot dog that
I ate on Friday. That's a good wiener.
That was a fucking awesome wiener.
That was a really good or was it how it was barbecued? Probably. Like, the judge We didn't The judge barbecued the judge barbecued, and we didn't cook it. We didn't cook it. So food always prepared by others tastes better. Course. Right? But I think the judge was a
good barbecuer. He was a good barbecuer. He was
a good barbecuer. Right? He did good. He did good. Yeah. But, yeah, let's let's get some. But but don't get them, like, 3 weeks ahead of time.
You know what we should do? We should buy a present for the lake.
Like what? We should
buy them an air fryer. They they don't want that.
They don't want that. You want that. We did this last year. They don't want that. How about we just go and hopefully we don't break something at the lake?
Oh, god. The year we broke the coffee pot.
Coffee pot. Remember we broke didn't we break the handle on the electric fry pan? Oh, shit. We did too. Right? We just need to mind our p's and q's. Yes. Don't break anything else. And just be good and just be good. So let's see how this let's see how this plays out for you.
I think we need to ask Michelle what kind of food she wants.
I think she just brings what she wants.
Well, and it's always really good stuff, and it's like, oh, you're a mom. You know what to do, don't you?
She knows she knows that stuff. Right? Yeah. We're like like bun with pulled pulled apart turkey breast on it. And some cheese. And some cheese. Lunch. We just had 6 courses.
Yeah. And and your idea about, like, you know, cheese and meat and, like, a charcuterie thing is, like, hacking off That that's my style.
No. It's not right, though. Looking rugged. That's why. Looking rugged. It's not
freaking like you basically, like, grabbed it and chewed it and spit it out.
And here's the beauty. You'll never know for sure if I did or didn't, will you? Oh, god. Because would you put the would you totally put that past me up there?
No. I don't know if
I'd count me out of that totally.
No. I don't think well, you know what? It would depend what kind of, fake tooth teeth day you were having. If they were feeling secure, you might
If they're secure, I'll I'll I'll chew it off and spit it onto the plate. Right? Just like a mama bird feeding her birdies.
Oh, god.
Okay. Alright. Let's talk about I'm shaking my head. Uh-huh. Shaking my head at at my phone that I love because it's a vessel for warnings about the weather. I'm shaking my head this weekend. I was shaking my head, Samantha, at the fact that there was so many warnings coming up on the phone Uh-huh. About tornadoes that never panned out.
I don't how about send me the warning when it's panning out? When it's panning out.
Because they want you to be prepared.
They want to create hype that doesn't need to exist. Because now, you know what? It's like remember, it's like it's like the the girl who cried wolf. That's what I feel this is. Oh, oh, another one. Okay.
Oh, yeah. Sure. It's bias. Oh, whatever.
Right. Right? Shooter on the loose. Oh, yeah. For sure. Bang. Oh, apparently, there was. Right? I just I don't take it serious anymore.
There were many tornado touchdowns over in the alp in the Prince Albert area, though. Yeah. That's fine. Right? That's nowhere near my home.
So I don't need to know that news as it's happening.
Oh, yes. I know. Right?
That's the thing, right, is that it's making it in real time everywhere in our province.
It is. And you know what? I agree. Because, you know, the tornado watches, they're, like, telling you, you gotta go to the basement, go to interior wall, and I'm, like, I don't got a basement. I'm in an apartment building. Where am I going?
That's what I said to Mike.
Am I huddling in the parkade? Like, I don't think I wanna be in the parkade when shit's happening.
I don't know. I like, I we're on the main floor. So do I click, where do where where do we go? Where do we go? Like, the bathroom, both of us seems yuck. Right? Like, everything, we're just gonna get demolished. We're pretty much No joke. I'm not gonna follow it because I know I'm already toast. Oh my god. Building's gonna fall on me, and we die.
That's how it goes.
I don't know. But, like, I'm just curious. Like, all of a sudden, tornado watches were having horrible rain. Like, it won't stop raining.
What kind of summer are we going to have? Because, like, who pissed off mother nature? Did somebody do something and we're not aware of it?
I don't know. Maybe. Right? Did somebody spit at mother nature? Something. Thumb their nose at mother nature. It's like Buddy,
mother nature.
What's going on? I feel that mother nature's being bullied into being a bitch. Well,
then with the because I got it on my phone.
Yeah. Everyone else apparently got it on their TV. Him on the TV. And I'm
like, Everyone else apparently got it on
their TV. Him on the TV.
And I'm like, do I need to pack a to go bag? Like, do I need a a go bag?
Right.
Is this what's happening here? Do I need to
going? And then where are you going?
Where am I going?
I'm going. Where am I going? Right? Right? Where am I going?
Oh my god. I'm so not going on my balcony, apparently.
Right. And if I'm glass.
Yes. And I I should probably go to my bathroom. They're like, well, my bathroom's a little boring, and
And that's only so fun. Yeah. Right? Like, I don't know. I feel that unless they're gonna give me a okay. Here's the scenarios. Right? So if you live in a home, do this. Go to your basement. If you live in a tent, get out of your tent.
If you live in the 1st floor of an apartment, you're screwed because the building's gonna fall on you. I need there to be a follow through plan. Right? So I need to see the warning. Okay. I see the warning. What do you want me to do about it? A, b, c, d. No. I can't do anything.
I'll just keep watching TV till the power goes out. You did not come up with an option for me.
And then okay. So the stupid thing is is that I was at my parents, and then the weather started to get horrible. And then that's when all the tornado watches were starting to come up, and I was grocery shopping, and I'm like, well, what if the power goes out? I don't even know where my flashlight is. I should, you know, so I bought, like, a lighter. I bought little, like, tea lights in case I needed
to You melted all of it, and it was
fine. I got sucked into the Sucked into
all of it.
That's why I thought I needed to pack a to go bag.
Like Well, you know what? God knows you have enough to go bags in your car. I do. So you could pack a to go bag and keep it in your car. And when when danger comes close, you pack a to go bag ready to go.
Me and Betty, we're heading out.
We're we're we are out of here unless it's hailing. Right? We've tried to drive through hail. That's not that bad.
Oh, driving hail is
bad. Oh, good. Right? That's not No. Nobody tells you what to do with that situation. Stop. But where? And then just let it hit you, or do you try and outrun it and hope you can get away from it? Try to outrun it, maybe. Right? I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do.
But, yeah, it's so weird. And then just because weather seems to be the big talk right now. Right? People are out mowing their lawns because they're afraid it's gonna rain. I think I think that's the etiquette. That if it's gonna rain, people think they need to mow their lawn quickly.
Well, their lawn lawns grow quicker with more rain.
Right? They wanna mow it down. They hear, oh, it's gonna rain. Everybody's out there with their lawnmower. Look at me, everybody. I got a lawnmower. Look at me. It's a lawnmower. Who cares? What I care about is what is the lawnmowing etiquette? When is the right weekend time to fire that bad boy up? 8 o'clock in the morning.
Seems too soon. Seems too it should be 10. Should be 10. Should be 8 AM. It should be 10. It's like it's like like, there was no memo that went around about that.
You know what? If you're an early riser, you're doing it as soon as you think about it, and it doesn't matter if everyone else around you is sleeping.
So but it's but then okay. So so we're just we're just encouraging people to be rude, ignorant assholes. Pretty much. Right. Fire up your lawnmower and just be rude. Yeah. I got issues with that.
Uh-huh. Yeah. It's like the guys who are working on the apartment building across from my apartment building.
Yeah.
Those guys are at work 7:30 in the morning, making noise, clanging away, and I'm like,
you're lucky I'm up. Like, maybe from 7:30 to 9, you just do your paperwork or you get your coffee break out of the way. Ask everybody how their day was. That's just you.
That's just you.
As if I'm getting paperwork out of the way at 9 AM.
Well, this is true. You're just usually having, you know, a coffee and visiting. Right?
I like to do my rounds before I start my day. I like to go see how my people are all doing. Everybody, you had a good night last night? How was your night last night? Did you have an okay night? Oh, good.
Good. Lots of coffee today.
Right. Lots of coffee. Lots of business from Lisa. Oh my god. I'm sure I drive them crazy.
Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So I I was scrolling through the the ticky talky, or maybe it was Instagram. I don't know. Social media. Whatever.
Whatever. They're the same, pretty much. I came across an ad. An ad? Okay.
I gotta talk about it, Lisa, because it's supposed to help us as we are in our menopausal years.
Oh my god. Because we're, like, midlife old ladies. It's, the company was called Naughty Knickers. That sounds interesting.
I'm like, are you kidding me? And it's apparently cooling sleepwear. Oh. And it's supposed to it's like a tank top and, like, a pair of shorts, and it reduces night sweats. And and all I thought was, is this a gimmick? Like, what is
this like that bamboo stuff
they talk about? Apparently. And I'm like, what's with the name of your company? Naughty Knickers? Like, what's that?
That sounds like like like sexy panties or something.
It sounds like Bob. Like a wawa.
And don't get me wrong. Sexy panties, I guess, probably are cooler. If you're trying to sleep. Not much there. Because there's not much there. Is that the is that the gist?
No. But these were a full tank top and a full pair of, like, underwear. Like, it was like a shorts.
Why is this naughty?
I I don't know. And I was like, okay. So is this how you get women who are in their perimenopausal, menopausal years
Right.
To stop and check out your your ad because you called it Naughty Knickers.
It's called the Naughty Knickers.
It's just emphasizing the fact that you're going through the change, and you're, like, sweating like a pig as you lie in your bed.
I think the thing is is that, you know, I mean, you can have your bamboo and your chillo and all of that sort of stuff. Right? Like like I'll take a chillo. I'm sure I would take a chillo. Right? Yeah. Because I think, like, if my head would be cool, I'd be fine. I don't like to eat night sweats but kind of I do. But I think at the end of the day, like, I don't know. I don't think anything's gonna I don't think anything can cool down this temperature.
No. I think it's an inner fire. It's an inner fire. Right?
Rages whenever it was. Exactly. Right? Wendy's Pikes said something about it. She said, Being a woman is the worst. Right? What do we do? We give you babies, and then you set us on fire.
It's totally true.
I'm like, isn't that true? Right? It's totally true. And they say it's a little worse than the women who didn't give babies.
I would I'm not experiencing that. Are you not? No. I think it's genetic it's also genetics too. It depends what your your the women in your family have experienced. Right. Mom, your grandma.
My father said that my mom when I said to him, like, how was she during menopause? And he's like, you don't remember? I'm like, no. She was always in menopause. I'm like, oh, convenience. Convenient. Yeah. Convenient, I think. I don't know. I think I just think that I think menopause has meant that we're supposed to just, like, like, like, just suck it up and it's gonna be horrible.
I think there are things out there that will truly help a woman get through the life experience. However Fan. A fan
of things to work.
If the people who are creating companies to sell product to women who are in these stages of their life, Let's come up with better names for your companies than Naughty Nickers.
Like, how about just call them, like, I'm fucking hot pajamas. Right? Let's cool you hot bitches down.
If you could just name your product appropriately.
Right? Because I think that would just help a little bit.
I think it would help. Yes.
You know? Because we also have a little bit of confusion during these years.
Oh my god. Don't even start with brain fog.
Right? And then that just starts that just keeps right? It's disgusting. I don't know. I just use a fan. I'm a fangirl, totally a fangirl, until I wake up, like, because apparently, I'm also a mouth I'm a mouth breather now. And then I get, like, super dry mouth.
Yeah. Because you're breathing through your mouth.
Right? So then I need to quickly drink water because I'm about to die, I'm sure. Right? It's not sleep apnea because that's not an issue. But it's just because I'm because somehow I became a horrible mouth breather. Yeah. You don't breathe breathe through your nose anymore. And that's the worst thing. Right? Like, why did God have to give us that tool? Like, like, dear Lisa, you haven't enough. Let's make you a mouth breather now in your fifties.
Oh, that's pleasant. Thank you. Okay.
Oh, we're just trying to get as much air as possible.
Right? Apparently. I don't know.
Okay. So, you know, I told you I I grocery shopped on Sunday. Right?
Yeah. Yeah. You have you hate grocery shopping.
I know. But I just I realized
something, and it's I'm shaking my
head at myself. Oh. I'm the problem. It's me.
Hi. I'm the problem. It's me.
Yep. It's me while grocery shopping. 3 people. 3 people. In the span of time, it took me to get what I needed because it wasn't a lot, asked me to move because, apparently, I don't know proper grocery store etiquette like standing in an aisle.
You don't because I think you think you're the only one there. You have a shitty attitude at the grocery store, actually. Right? You have, like, this resting bitch face, like,
I do. Because people were scared to people were scared because they're like, excuse me, and I'm like, oh, sorry. I'm sorry. They're, like, no. That's okay.
That's like Right? And you're probably throwing your sarcastic tone in there with the oh, sorry. No. And then you roll your eye.
No. I was no. I roll well, okay, maybe I rolled my eyes.
But you
know what? I've but I feel like it's progress for me when I realized that I might be the pop.
Okay. But no. What the progress is, Samantha, is if you can fix the problem. You know what? Only half of the battle.
I'm not sure if I can fix the problem. I don't know if you wanna fix the problem. I hate grocery shopping.
Right? So you just want the whole experience to be miserable for everybody.
People to not be around me.
Right. Right. And that's hard when you go at
3 o'clock on Sunday. That's why I'm shaking my head at me. That's why I'm shaking my head because I know that it's me. However, I'm not I'm not, at this point in time, willing to take the steps to be better. Alright.
Well, I think yeah. I will I will I will commend you on ex on on on owning it, and I will look down on you for not being willing to change it. Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter. Not doing it. Right? I don't care. Well, I went shopping because I feel I need a new bathing suit.
Right? Because I thought I needed one last year. Although, maybe I don't because it might, apparently, it's gonna be games week at the at the lake. Yeah. Because it's not gonna be nice. So that's gonna be a lot of Lisa and Sam time. Oh, dear God. Gonna be horrible. But we'll make the best of it.
So anyway, so I thought last year I need to get a new bathing suit. Right? But I did. So this year, I went to go get a new bathing suit. K? I'm gonna go I bought bathing suit bottoms. Remember new bottoms,
new shorts?
Yes. So I thought, just gonna go. I'm gonna go to the Walmart. I'm gonna bite the bullet, pay 39.99, and get a new bathing suit. Right? I can do this. But you know what the problem is? Oh, yeah. Well, first off, we have to go back to Walmart because we have to take it back. I'm I'm not going with you.
We always go and do one trip before we go. No. We don't. Then we'll do it on the way up. No. We don't wanna do that. Then we'll have to do it before. Those are the options because it's going back because it don't fit because I refuse to try it on.
I'm not trying it on, and it don't fit. What if they don't take it back? It's still got off bathing suit. I got it says it will. I got the receipt. It still got the liner. Uh-huh. And then you think about that. Right? Like, that liner's been there for everybody's everyone's protection.
Gross. Right?
And yes. Need to be this person.
And yes. Right? The unwritten rule is that one keeps their panties on.
Yeah. That doesn't always happen, though.
No. Right? I feel confident that mine stayed on, but I don't know if that liner has always seen other panties or if it's seen other parts.
Yeah. Okay. Stop talking.
It's a little bit crinkly and seems a little well used, that liner. I'm sure it does. Like, nothing says clean and hygienic like a Walmart bathing suit.
You know what? I just think you should just keep talking about that because you haven't made me throw up yet, so go.
So I'm just saying it needs to go back. So my issue is because
I don't try on bathing suits there. Yes. And you should.
I I don't wanna try them on there either. I don't wanna step in the Walmart Then you need
to measure your body and and figure out if the circumference of that swimsuit God bless. There must be spandex in it.
It just Will it? It was it it it it
Have you have you tried your old ones yet?
No. I have my I have my tried and true old one, and then I had my one that I bought last year old one that I didn't wear because it didn't fit.
But it didn't fit because it was too big. Right?
Yeah. Well, I haven't grown into it. Well, it You can ask you'd be an asshole if that's where you're going. Of course, if you have grown. Yeah. My chin. My face isn't going into my bathing suit, Samantha. I seem to put my weight on in my face lately.
And that's not going near my bathing suit, actually, oddly enough.
That is not what I was talking about.
Okay. Anyway, moral of the story is I probably will still need your help with my old bathing suit again. Oh, I'd I Can
you just buy a 2 piece? No. Just buy a tankini.
I think then when I go in the water, my belly's gonna get cold. That doesn't excite me. And then if you're gonna float up, and that doesn't excite me. It's gonna float up. Fill up with air. That's not a whole I get irritated, girl. And I don't know. It seems to work for you.
Uh-huh. Yeah. I don't know. Oh, good god. I don't know. I don't know what you're gonna do. I don't know. Right?
You know, I was thinking because, you know, we were watching the hockey game. Right? And and I was like, you know, this sport needs some cheerleaders.
Oh, do you think so?
Yeah. Because, you know, rah rah, sisboomba, I mean, they don't even have, like, a or do they bring the do they have mascots?
There's a mascot somewhere, but it's probably just the teams the the home team's mascot.
Yeah. So I feel like every sport should have a cheerleader.
I feel that cheerleader should be a thing of the past. Why? I don't know. I don't think why do we need them? What are they doing?
They're cheering. They're encouraging. It's a whole idea. It's so associated with football for sure.
Yeah. I know. I know. But I just it's just women in little scantily clothed and, like, with a pom pom.
And they're going, you ugly. You ugly. Your mom says you're ugly.
You mama. You just you
know why you ain't got no alibi. You're ugly. Okay.
What? What? You're ugly. If they did that cheer, that would be kind of fun. Right? They come up with, like, saucy cheer. Maybe that's they need a saucy cheers.
Maybe that's it. Maybe the cheerleaders of the of the world need to think about saucier
chassier cheers. Right? Like, not just like like, defense. Ugh. We're over that. Right? How about, you suck. Okay. Let's do that cheer.
Right? Oh
my god. You know? And I feel that my face off topic, my face just looks bigger on StreamYard for some reason
Uh-huh. Okay.
Than in real life. I'm just saying. I don't know. I'm not a cheerleader fan.
I don't know. Well, just because you don't like them doesn't mean the world doesn't like them.
They're not allowed to have an opinion?
The Dallas Cowboys would be very offended by this conversation because they have, like, the cheerleaders from, like, hell.
They do. And I would be, like, and the point of view is?
And they're famous, and they go do good things, and they do care of you. Stuffs. Yeah. And they cheer the football teams on.
Hey. Okay. You've made your point. Need that
kind of cheering when they get in their ass booted.
You've made your point. I feel shitty. I take it back. I 1.
And we're gonna start with u g l y.
You ain't got no alibi. You ugly. You're ugly. What? What? Right. I could probably just
gotta learn the words, and then you can learn
the make up nouns. And I don't wanna do the action. That's the thing. Can I just be the stand there cheerleader?
My god. Of course. Because you're lazy
to do an action. Action. I'm not doing the
action. Oh, my god.
I'll shake a pom pom.
Of course, you will. Yeah. You'll shake that pom pom.
I'll shake the pom pom. Alright. K. This is, like, one of my favorite things to do lately. Right? Let's go back and let's remember the eighties, shall we? Uh-huh. K. These are things I wanna know if you remember from the eighties. Did you use them in the eighties? Did your mama use them in the eighties? Things like that.
K? Okay. Do you remember kitchen appliances, like the toaster and the blender, that came with a plastic decorative cover? No. You don't remember that? No. We had a toaster, and it had, like, a, like, a cover, and it was, like, all floral. And it was plastic so you could wipe it down quickly. Maybe my grandma did. And and there was one for the toaster. There was one for the blender.
I don't remember a blender. Maybe a toaster?
Maybe a toaster. Right?
It was like a toaster.
Like like a cozy for the toaster.
Like super eighties shit, though.
Totally super eighties, right, though.
Or maybe even seventies. Maybe, like, maybe late seventies? I feel like it might be a late it depends on the color. If it was yellow or orange or red. It was
it was like purple. It was seventies. It was totally harvest. Harvest, harvest, harvest. Right? Because that was the thing back in the seventies and the early eighties. It was drilled into our mind how important the harvest is. We sat on the harvest couch. We had harvest colored bedspreads.
Yes. And anything that could be harvesty. Oh my god. Green.
Yes. Green fridges. Green
Stoves. And and and then there was also gold. There's the gold ones too. Similar to the harvest meme. Right? I don't think we ever had anything other than white. Oh, no. I don't remember.
No. I feel like in my lifetime, we've had colored we've had colored applied. You had
the olive you had the olive collection maybe?
I feel like like my grandparents might have had that.
Okay. Okay. Yeah. Right? That was the thing. Kaye, you always love a good pen. Oh, god. Yeah. Do you remember this pen? It it it it mimicked a fountain pen, but it had disposable cartridges.
Yes. And, like, you'd buy the pen, and it would, like, have, like, 4 or 5 disposable cartridges. And you put them in, and it was like you were writing with a fountain pen.
Yes. I remember those.
That was a fun pen, Hank.
That was a fun eighties pen.
That was a fun made it seem fancy like a fountain pen.
Super fancy. What about the fact in
the eighties and my dad was was was the master of this. Everything got engraved. Of course, it did. Like, my dad took because he was a jeweler. He also had the engraver. So everything. Right? I got a fountain pen 1 year for for Christmas. Merry Christmas, Lisa.
Engraved on that guy. Right? I think it was like a craft. Like, if like like, you could have the best engraved shit. Yep. Everything got engraved. Right? Everything needed a little plaque on it. Literally, that little bar of engraved gold. Yep.
Did your mom used to make boxed pizzas from the from or pizzas from the boxed set?
Yes. They were delicious.
They were delicious, and they still make them. And I just wonder if they're still as good. They were so good. They were so good. Right? I feel that it was like a Bisquick a Bisquick crust or something.
Something. But they were delicious.
Right? And, like, and you and you didn't yeah. You maybe bought, like, a pepperoni stick or something. Yep. Yeah. But but that was it. Right? Other than that, it was their canned tomato sauce. Uh-huh. Perfect.
Their little their little shaker cheese in a package it's, like, so good.
You know, that was like a treat on a weekend.
Totally. Like, that was like a Friday night or Saturday night treat. Right? Yep. And then you'd watch pizza.
And then you'd watch, like, a movie on TV.
Totally. Right? Totally. Right? Mom was making pizza. Right? But they still sell them. And I'm like, We should try one of them one day to see if they're if they're still that good. Oh. They were so good. Did your mom have a plug in set of hot rollers? Probably.
Yeah. My mom did.
Yes. Or my grandma did for sure.
And last but not least, Samantha, our trip down eighties memory lane, remember how everything, all types of talcum powder came in tin can, decorative, thin colored cans. Yes. Right? And they always matched your bathrooms. Of course, they do. Right? And the
bathrooms were just as flowery as your kitchen.
Just tacky, hey. Just
tacky.
That seashell soap dish. Right? The seashell the seashell soap dish. Right? Totally.
Oh my god.
And, like, the soap that was just for company, but you never wanted to use it?
And it was because it was decorative soap.
It was like And
it was in the shape of shells to dish.
Shape of a shell. Soap dish. Everything coordinated very very much the same. Right?
And then there were towels that nobody ever touched.
Right. And chances are if you had that shell if you had the shell motif, then probably on your shower curtain were shells. Right? The rings were shells.
Oh my god. So much fun. So much fun.
Totally. The eighties house was all about towels you didn't touch.
Oh, for sure.
Yeah. Towel 2 towels in the front of the stove, don't touch. Uh-huh. Right. Those are just for decoration.
I just remembered in my grandparents' house in BC on Island Road, I remember their bathroom was blue.
Oh, okay. The tub was blue. Shag blue. Everything was blue. Ours was purple and gray, and we had, like, this tile. And it was, like, the crinkly tile, and it was purple and gray, purple and gray. Everything was purple and gray. Bathroom? Purple bathroom.
Oh my I
think the tub was white, but everything else was purple and gray. Oh my god. Yeah. It was weird. Hey.
So crazy. It was just weird. So much fun, though.
Yeah. Good times. Good times.
Good times. Good times. But you
know what else is a good time, Lisa? Samantha? Facebook Tuesday. Ah.
Your hot dog hamburger, what goes on that?
What goes on that? What goes on those?
Big hit today. Big hit. Right. Smashed smashed it, smashed records of people hating sauerkraut
And relish. Relish, apparently. Like, remember back in the day when you had ketchup, mustard, and relish? That's it. That's all you got, people. And and now people have issues with with one of the 3 founding fathers? 1 of the 3 founding fathers have hotdog condiments?
Yes, Lisa.
Even you, big mouth. Even your big mouth made a comment saying, I don't get relish. What's not to get about relish?
No. I don't. I don't understand why people hate relish.
Oh, I'm so sorry. Meant. Interpreted.
I don't get because they picked relish, and I'm like, I don't get relish. Why do you hate relish?
But you hate relish. The pickles. Cindy Harder, I like I like my my I don't like sweet. Well, you obviously don't like dum dum pickles. Right?
I don't and then okay. Some very, very opinionated thoughts about guacamole.
And it's, like, it's not necessarily guacamole, but it's the avocado idea of the guacamole, and it's actually quite good in a turkey burger. I'm just gonna throw that out there to the world.
And all these big guacamole eaters, I thought they eat that shit on everything. I do. Right. Good. That was their thing. It's delightful. Like sauerkraut, I I knew that they were gonna I knew they were gonna it had a target on its back.
Fermented cabbage, get it right.
It's delicious. It's delicious. Yes.
And, really, I could I probably would kick ketchup because I I don't care if I have ketchup on my hotdog, nor do I care if I have it on my hamburger. I'm really I'm really a relish, mustard, onion sauerkraut. Could do the chili. Could do the bacon. Could do the guacamole.
I would no guacamole for me, right, because I don't like it. You've never had it, so you don't know. In my mind, it's a food I don't like.
It's an ugly food. It's categorized as ugly.
It's not an ugly food.
That guacamole is ugly looking. Well It's not a pretty fruit.
I was supposed to say something really rude,
and I stopped myself. Just don't be rude.
And I stopped Just
don't be rude. And I stopped I stopped
my asshole tendency
in its tracks. Good. I appreciate that. I could live
I could live without mustard. No. I like mustard. I like it way better than ketchup. I don't like ketchup as much as everyone else does.
But I probably don't wanna kick anything to the curb when it comes to a hot dog or burger.
Well, no. Because you like your because you like a lot of choice.
I like stuff. I like the stuff. Right? I would add I would add grilled onions, but I was not brave enough to do that this week.
Nobody really liked kicked onions, though.
No. But if they were grilled onions, they would have been kicked to the curb.
Oh, do you think?
Yeah. Totally.
Why is it that every time you do a Facebook Tuesday, you keep back something that you like because you're afraid that people are gonna hate it?
Because I'm scarred from 2 Facebook Tuesdays back when we first started this thing a bajillion years ago. Number 1, was there treatment of Elf and how much the world hated Elf as a cartoon character. Really? Gordon Shemway? You have a prop with Gordon Shemway? The little creature who comes from Melmac and likes to sell real estate and likes Lucky? Lived with the Ochmanix all of these things that my kid sister and I love about elf and oh my god poo pooed it so badly. Pooh pooed, point number 1. Point number 2, do you remember the blue freezy debacle? The best tasting freezy ever. Ever. And that day, everybody shit on the blue freezy.
They did.
They totally did. So so sometimes, if I'm having a bad Monday night and I'm putting together uh-huh, Facebook Tuesday, I'm not
You become you become very sketchy
in what you I'm not always willing to be the lamb that's headed out to pasture.
To slaughter. Right?
I'm not I don't always wanna be sacrificed that way.
Okay. Alright. Alright.
Calm down, but it was fun.
It was good. It was a good Facebook Tuesday. It was fun. So, guys, we do have to tell you, we do have news, but we can't tell you yet.
Oh, we have such big news. It's not
We're not ready yet. Breaking news. Yet.
Breaking news breaking news is that can't tell you the breaking news. We can't tell you anything
because we're not there yet.
We're not there. However, if you were a Patreon person, you would already know the news.
You would already know this. So What?
But there's even more to it than that now.
Oh, there's so much more. Right? And and but in the prep to the new news
Right.
New news. New news. We we have been told, you're funnier than you think.
We're funnier than we think. And what And I That's an awesome compliment.
That is a very awesome compliment.
From a wonderful woman, a wonderful lady who knows your shit, Samantha.
Yes. However, after some thinking After
thinking Oh, after we gathered our thoughts And overthought it. And overthought it, we both agreed that that comment also now sounds like expectation. It felt like expectation. Feels like expectation.
And we, as true Canadians, were like, woah.
Woah.
Stop that.
Slow your roll.
Stop that.
I feel we need a safe word here.
We are not prepared.
We're not prepared to deliver on expectation.
Oh my god. There's expectations? We have no expectation?
No. But but, of course, that we're putting that on ourselves.
Well, you know She's paying
us a lovely compliment, and we're like, yeah. Thank you so much, and then it's up to you.
Oh, and then we're like, oh, shit.
Mean by that?
Oh my god.
What does she want? What do you think? What the hell's up with that? Why is she being nice?
Oh, yeah. We're not we're not used to people being nice to us. I know.
Right? We're just used to being kinda, like, you know, the odd the odd people out.
Yes. We're the odd ducks. I tell you.
I said we weren't rock stars, and she said, yes. We are. Yes. Right? I'm like, oh, that felt
like expectations again.
That didn't just feel it. That that's that's expectation. Anyways, we can't wait to share the news. Yes. It'll be good. It'll be good. It's worth the wait. It's worth the wait.
But to prep for all of that Yes. You could join us on our social platforms.
We're gonna need you to. We're gonna need you guys
to join us on our social platforms, or you can check out our website, which is I shake my head pod, pod.com, and sign up for our newsletters, check out our blog, maybe stay to listen to an episode or 2. That would be kinda cool.
And Kathy, friend of the podcast, she she replied to our newsletter today. Yes. She did. But she thought it was very funny. Our mar I read about Mars Bars.
Yeah. She liked to write about Mars Bars. Yeah.
Lisa. Right? So hi. So so that's kind of exciting.
Yeah. So, guys, if you also wanna watch what we do while we're talking on the podcast, we do have a YouTube page, which we do share our video of the episodes. You can subscribe and get notified of a new episode. So we have 95 subscribers now? 96. 96. 96.
It only took 6 months to get where
I needed to go. Or more. Or more. And then we've reached your February goal, Samantha. I know. It's Go team. Awesome. That's the type of expectations we deliver on.
Thanks.
Exactly. And, also, guys, just to remind you, we do a Patreon, which is patreon.com/ishakemyhead. For as little as $2 a month, you get the episode early and an extra episode every month. So join us there if you can, but, again, we do have the website, which is kinda cool. And if you sign up, you can go there. You can check it out and listen to the episodes there too.
So It's perfect. It's one stop shopping. Yeah.
It's a landing page for all fun things. I shake
my head. All fun things. All fun things. Okay. Well, guess what? I'm shaking my head again. I'm shaking my head at yeah. Yeah. I know it's gonna sound petty, and it's not that exciting, but it's just something that kinda picked my ass.
I shake my head at motion sensor sinks because the motion sensor never works. No. I don't. And if you're in there with other people, you look stupid. Just the dribble so people know that I at least tried to wash my hands after I peed. Yep. Right. Yep.
Shake my head at that.
I hate that. I hate when they don't work properly.
Right. Like like, whose motion is it set to? And then
it and then you wonder. It's like, is it too close? Is it too far away? Is it too up? Is it too down? Is it too off to the side? Like, do you have to do a funky dance? Do you have twirl?
Do you like, what is it? Doing? Right? Like, what is and then are and then am I being punked? Or is this a joke? Because there's somebody behind the scenes going, let's give her a little splash, we'll give her the soap but not the water. Because that always happens to you. You got a handful of soap. Uh-huh. She can't get the water. Can't get the water.
Yeah. The soap dispensers that are motion sensor too are a pain in the ass.
And sometimes so are the paper towel ones. Yes. It's like, how about I be in control of my paper towel? Thank you. Right? Maybe that's the thing is because we don't have control. Right. Because you can't
just lift a lever or I I can't just something.
Soap or turn the water on or totally about control, Lisa. Right? Like, don't take away the control to the basics because guess what? Then people are gonna stop washing. And that's not Well And that's not good. Kinda already you a little bit. Not me ever. I wash my hands every time I go to I wash my hands when you're required to. I know. One day.
One day. I'm gonna I'm gonna not have to defend that.
Yeah. It's one day.
One day. One day, Samantha. Okay. Thursday. Thursday Thursday Thursday. Big big night on TV. Must see TV. Yes.
This is the first presidential debate. Will Trump show up? Yeah.
I think he will.
Because that's what makes it exciting. Right? Uh-huh. That's what makes it exciting is if Trump shows up.
Here's hoping they all if they do both show up, that they actually make sense.
And there's an independent too. Oh, shut up. Okay. He's a Kennedy. Oh, he's a Kennedy? But not a but I don't think he's a good one. He's the one that had remember, there was a Kennedy that had, like, a worm in his brain. It was in the news. He had, like, a worm in his brain.
This is the alternative.
Somebody with a worm in his brain. Grandpa Joe. Sex offender Trump. You know what? Dear America, you are in good hands. And don't get me I We are not anywhere in Canada.
We are not any better.
I get that. Right?
We really, really aren't.
Right. But when you have your podcast and you wanna make fun of Canadian politics, it's not that exciting. Feel free.
We are not exciting when it comes to politics. It's boring. Our guys just show up stupid.
Yeah. But I may we don't even watch them. We even watch our we don't even watch our stuff.
Because it's stupid.
I'll be tuning in. Will you be tuning in, Samantha? No. Well, I'll be tuning in.
Oh, if someone says pudding, bring me into the conversation. Pudding.
I'll I'll text you quickly. Pudding. That's the keywords for you to know. I gotta jump in.
Yeah. Then I gotta catch it.
Then you gotta catch it. Right? Because it's gonna be good. I can't wait. Can't wait.
Oh my god. Okay. So I don't know how to feel. Well, I don't know. Like, let's just put her on our judgment pants, shall we?
Yeah.
Former New England Patriot coach, he's 72 years old. Bill Belichick. Has began has begun seeing Jordan Hudson, who is 24. So what do we think of this age difference? And is it any like, would it be different if it was a woman who was 72 and the man who was 24? Do we have a bigger issue with a woman dating a younger man? I think it's all. Older man dating a younger woman.
I think it's all not right.
Well, I saw the picture of the gentleman. I read the He's not
a traitor. Right? I'm trying to understand. He's rich. He's rich. Oh my god. But guess what?
Dawn, that's such a bad stereotype.
Right? But but that's but how where else do you go with that? I don't know. They have no life in common.
They have not experienced life at all.
They have lived through nothing similar.
She has
she has not lived life yet.
She's 24. She's 24.
She's a baby girl.
Does he have kids?
I think he has kids.
So he just wants to keep populating the world? Is that the idea? Is that if he dates someone younger and marries them, he can at least have more kids?
I don't know. It's 72. Shouldn't that be No.
Men's nope. Men's seeds live on, Lisa.
What a thought. God. Get them fixed. Get them fixed.
Oh my god. That's the that's the law we need to put in place.
After, like,
once a man reaches 70, snip, snip.
Or if you haven't done it already. Why why can't it be the same for women? Once once women are no longer putting out eggs, they they're biologically, they've stopped that process. Uh-huh. Dude, that's the magic age. You too now. Snip, snip. Snip, snip. Right?
But men can produce into their 8 well, I believe a couple of famous actors
Robert De Niro, proven that
very much. They can still woo hoo.
Here's the thing. And I'm just gonna go there. And and and it's politically not correct. Right? Yeah. Let's just talk about the dinky for a moment, shall we?
Please. Shall we? Because we have talked about penises for a while.
Like, it's bad enough at a young age. It's bad enough in its mid twenties, thirties, forties. Let alone that dinky, that wrinkly dinky. It's 80. Oh.
Oh my god. Don't. I wanna talk to
the woman that's okay with that. I well I wanna hear the pros and cons to that argument.
Apparently, it's love, Lisa, so it doesn't matter.
Oh, it matters.
No. Apparently, it doesn't.
You know what? Whoever said love is blind, they lied. It's judgmental. No. Love conquers all. Come on. Love is judgmental.
We're judgmental. Let's get back here.
Love is judgment and just judging.
I I just but I okay. So here, we're kinda going, oh, 72 year old man, 24 year old woman. So would we have the same feeling if it was a 72 year old woman and a 24 year old man?
I think I would. I think I'd still think, like, I still have that You're done okay with this? Right? Yeah. I think it's based on the life that they haven't lived. They have no like, what is their frame of reference for experience?
Okay. So let's just say let's just say they're just doing it for some fun, some shit, and some giggles. Right?
Right.
K? He's an old man. Okay. But but, really, the woman is in it just for the experience with the younger man at the age of 24.
Right? Sure.
Let's be real.
Totally.
She totally knows what she wants. She'll go for it. She still probably got some stamina in her. Yeah. You know? Young man's like, I'm up for it.
She is a better she is a better woman than I.
Right? So I think for for for both parties, depending you're the older man or the older woman, whatever, it must be the experience of that of banging someone younger. Well, it has to be part of it. Right? It has to be.
Right? The thrill of banging it, like, for, like, an old lady. Right? Like, I'm a cougar. I got me a boy toy.
And and, honestly, we don't know what God brought them together. I mean, she's really young. Then I would rather it just be that than just call it that. Right? But maybe it's not. Maybe they have let this connection that they maybe she's an old soul. Maybe she likes all the things that people
David Foster and Katharine McPhee.
Oh, yeah. He's just about
to have his 75th birthday. But let's let's look at David Foster and Bill Belichick and just see if there's a difference. Oh, yeah. Right? Somebody holds a gun to your head, I'll take David Foster at 75.
But at least Katharine McPhee and David Foster have things in common.
Well or or they do now. They have a kid. Well And they sing, and she sings.
And they're entertainer.
Right.
You're right? They have lots in common.
Right. Right. It's true.
Right? They have a theme. So maybe she's a cheerleader.
Maybe she's a cheerleader. Right? Oh, it's so mean. And she wants to learn about football. Maybe.
Oh my god.
Maybe her dad played football. Maybe. I don't know. It just seems weird. It's it seems weird.
I'm just saying, like, I think some people don't have a problem with age and some people do. And, apparently, we are those people.
We are those people. Right? Right? No wrinkly dinky. Just saying. Oh, yes, please. Yeah. So I got a I got a interesting text message today. Friend of the podcast, John Domingo.
He's not just a friend of the podcast.
I know he is a friend of podcast. He's our editor.
He's also the editor.
Right. And he's Sam's boyfriend.
Baby is my boyfriend.
Hey, babe. K. He sent me a link. Read an article.
Yes. He sent me as well.
He's an all around good guy. Can we just call
him that? He is an all around good guy.
Right? He's an all around good guy. Right? He sent me an article. He sent us a link to an article to read. Yes. I'm just gonna share it. Okay? Just to pin that there's a woman from Canada flashing her breasts on the subway atop the Brooklyn Bridge and in the heart of Times Square. And she's saying it's an act of advocacy. This is a Canadian.
Uh-huh.
The Canadian gal who just goes around, lifts, and shows. It's
an act of it's an act of advocacy for feminism.
Because she feels that if men can walk around shirtless without fear of of of any repercussions, why can't women?
Yes. So on behalf of on behalf of all Canadians, we apologize.
Yeah. Thank you for doing this. Jesus Christ. It's not our proudest moment, dear lady.
No. And it's like, okay. So I read it, and I'm just like she's like, we should all be nude. And apparently, because I read the article, there the reason why she's doing this in New York
Oh, it's because it's because nude in fact.
There's no there's a law was passed in 1992, 30 years old, that women can be shirtless in public, topless in public. Mhmm. In New York and not get arrested for it. Here she is going around flashing tourists, and she thinks it's funny. She thinks it's entertaining, and then, like, is it entertaining for the people that you're flashing?
I don't wanna see your boobies. I don't wanna see them.
And I'm like, she's like, everyone should be nude. I don't know why people don't. And I'm like, I get that you feel like this, but why do we have to now listen to your stupid rhetoric?
Right. Right.
Why do we now need to buy into your concept of how you feel you need to live your life?
Totally.
If you need to flash your boobs, go to the nudist colonies. Go to the places that allow you to be shirtless.
Yeah. But but there's a difference. Right? If she wants to be shirtless and be part of that law, then I guess that's her god given right now. Yeah. But she's doing it. But by flashing, that's that's an act of catching people off guard.
Off guard.
That's like, look at me, everybody. Right? So it's so it's different than just being comfortable in your no shirt.
Uh-huh. Because it's not it's not you're not do
you're wanting people to to feel uncomfortable. Right? Right?
I'm like, that's not feminism.
Not feminism.
That's not to me, in my old age, that is not feminism.
You're not old. You're middle aged.
I'm middle aged. I'm not, like, I just don't feel women go around flashing their boobs at total strangers when they have not asked to see your boobs. Right. Right. Why are you doing that?
Be in the park and walk with no shirt if that's the law.
And the reason why she's and she's in New York because she can't do it here.
She can't do
it here. Canada and get away with it and not get arrested. Right.
Because in Canada, don't you dare. Don't you dare. Don't you dare. Don't you dare. Oh my god. We're you
know what? All the power to you, but you are not doing it to me from what I've read, and that could in in itself is not enough information.
I don't feel empowered by her.
I do not feel empowered by it, nor do I feel like it is in the right vein of advocacy and No. Being free. Like, you're doing it for shock value and and and to, like, create this phenomenon around yourself.
And to get put in the New York Times and now to go on, like, our great podcast.
Uh-huh. And she's apparently a content creator, so this must be good for your brand or what you're ever you're doing and the money you're making. Yeah. Congratulations.
Yay for you.
Do you need to did you need to let people know you're Canadian?
That's all I need. That's I feel I'm a little embarrassed for you.
I just don't
get it. But thanks for the article. Yeah. Like, ugh.
Yeah. No. Pass. Not feminism. I'm sorry. Pass.
Pass. We're passing. We're passing. Passing. We're stopping it. Totally. Stopping. Totally stopping it.
Right?
Okay. So I've been driving around.
Uh-huh.
And all of a sudden, things have caught my eye. And all I think is, people, why do your personal license plates make no fucking sense? I got an 8, and I got a t, and I got a k, and I'm like, what is that?
Yeah. Like, I can't even at the I can't even at the stoplight understand it.
No. And I'm like, don't. Don't do a license plate that only you get.
Right.
Because you know what? You own you're the only person who understands It's not funny to anybody else.
It's not funny. And I gotta read that. Nobody cares about it now. We just think you're dumb. No. I just think, what are you doing? Why'd you why would you waste money on that? Right? Right.
And all I just think is I shake my head at the weird, weird people who think that doing, like, I don't know, half a number or I don't know what they're doing on their license plate.
Get it. I don't get it.
I'm just like, stop it. Like, I get it
if your license plate says grandma grandma's cookies. Okay. I get that.
Gramma's cookies. Too many words. Not gonna happen.
Right. So but but to short form that to, like, where nobody understands things? Right. Right.
I don't need to decipher license plate. I'm just saying Right. Shake my head, stop it. Why we allow that to happen here in this province?
I'm not sure. Well, and it feels like it's back on trend. Right? Because it seems like they there you're right. There there there's more of them. Yes. Totally. Totally. Stop it.
Stop it.
People say extra money for that.
Yeah. Right? That I shake my head at that. Not necessary. No. Guess what I did? Guess what I did? Guess what I did? I started a new series on the on the Apple called Presumed Innocent. Remember I talked about it last week? Jake Gyllenhaal. Did you watch it? No. So first off, this is why I hate series.
So I watched the first one. I didn't love it. Right? I'm like, told you about it, told Michelle about it. I was like, nah, but I'm gonna watch it again. Watched it. Still felt that about the first one. Watched the second one. K? I'm invested.
Watch the third one. Oh, it's saucy. It's sexy and saucy and murdering and killing and blood and cheating scandal. So watched the third one, Intuit, thought, oh, you know what? It's still wide awake. I'm gonna watch the 4th one. Yeah. It airs on fucking Thursday.
Yeah. And that is what you like about cable TV, Lisa.
But not after I've just binged and I'm into it. Then I I'm in full binge mode now. So that's my issue. Right? I don't binge many shows, but I was prepared to binge. Uh-huh. And then it stops.
And now you understand why people binge.
I understand that if it's that good of a show like this one. Right? You can't just lead in with all this gossiness and then stop it. Cold turkey.
Oh my god. Well, now maybe you'll give Palmer Royal a chance. I don't know. I'll see. Kristen Wiig, Carol Burnett.
I'll see. Well, let's just say I'm not I'm not I'm not quite as into my Blue Jays as I once was.
No. Because they're dying.
Well, I'm still watching them all the time, but it's, like, painful. Painful. It's like Chinese water torture. That's what it feels.
Well, you don't have to worry. They won't be going to the World Series.
So They will they might not even be asked to play after the halfway mark. They might be like, maybe you guys just wanna regroup and take the rest of the season off.
You should just sit this out.
Right? Just sit sit it out. Right? You're not gonna do any worse than what you already are now. You're gonna end up in the last place. You're already there. You're already there. Yeah. So let's just let's just call it a day. Oh.
I tell you. It's a sad day. Oh, it's a bad year. Really bad year. Really bad year. But watch that show. Watch it. Saucy.
Saucy. Saucy.
Alright. Right? How often do you write something down or see your signature now these days?
Oh my god. I don't even I can barely hold a pen. Oh, I write stuff down all the time. Do you? I don't write much. The odd time at work, I have to write a check, and, boy, that's, like, painful. Hey. Spell the words so they're legible.
Yeah. There's monocorrect.
Right? And that's just not even my name. That's like like like, you know, like 600. It's like, oh, my god. Right? Yeah.
We cannot. We we are the generation that knows all things. We cannot lose the ability to write.
We can't lose cursive.
Or signatures, or like how to spell out $642.
We cannot lose that. Right? We also can't lose how to count back change. No. We need to know how to count back change. We do. It's a skill that everybody needs to know. We need to know how to we need to know our cursive, and we need to know how to count back change. Those cannot die with us.
You need to know what a $5 bill looks like and a $10 bill looks like.
I have seen some confusion over coin, and it's like, really? Yep. Like, it's a dime. But that's the thing. What do we do with this? What do we do with it? It's money. Right?
I know. It's the things that we're losing because we have so much
And it's all great until technology goes down. Yeah. Right? You can't lose everything. You just can't throw it all to the curb.
Yeah. Because you can keep your notes
in an app. Yep. Yeah. Totally.
Somebody can can somebody, an app can listen to your meeting. Yeah. It can do a voice memo.
Like Yeah. It's it's crazy what it can do.
But we have to it's bad enough now with facial recognition on my phone. I don't even know my passwords anymore. No idea. Oh my god. When you say to me, what's our password? I'm like, oh god. I don't know. Let me check my face. I don't know.
I'll have to look. You have I I can't help you. Right? It only knows me.
It only knows you. There you go.
It only knows me. Sorry. Yeah. We can't let those things go down with the ship. I know, but they are. They are. Right?
Slowly but surely.
Slowly but surely.
What? And it's
we gotta we gotta preserve some things.
We and you know what we're gonna preserve? Feedback. That's what we're gonna preserve. You know why? Because we want feedback on what we talk
about. Right. It's coming. It's coming. There's some of you that are giving it.
Yes. So check us check out our website, which is www.ishakemyheadpod.com. You can leave a message or a voice mail, and you might just find it being mentioned during an episode. And Kathy was mentioned.
I went sent an email. We have yet to get a voice mail.
Oh, those are fun. Anybody wanna leave a voicemail?
Leave a voicemail. This goes on the only we hear it. Yeah.
Check out our swag at threadless which is ishakemyhead.threadless.com. You just never know that you might need a t shirt with, you know, us. Us. Why
wouldn't you?
Why wouldn't you?
Why wouldn't you?
And we wanna thank John Domingo for editing our audio and video every week.
And we apologize that our breaking news is not broke yet.
No. We have to wait.
It's coming. It's just coming. Worth the wait. It's worth the wait. It's worth the wait. Samantha. Lisa. Got anything else you wanna talk about? No.
I'm good. I wanna talk about one more quick thing. Uh-oh. You know how we love Yahtzee? Oh, yes. There's a new Yahtzee. It's called Yahtzee Words.
Oh. It's a it's
a 7 sided dice and has alphabet letters on it. And you make words like the Yahtzee. Had a lady buy it in the gift shop. And she's like, oh my god. I love Yahtzee. This looks so awesome. I said to her with a straight face, it looks stressful. It looks super stressful, which to me takes the fun out of a game.
Yeah. Totally.
Looks really stressful. Right? Hi. And then in the Yahtzee score pad, you have to make, like, 3 words, 4 letter word. I'm like, nope. Right? You think about Yahtzee itself. Right? And how sometimes that can get a little bit, like, thought provoking. Like, oh, do I do do I do my fours or do I make it 3 of a kind? You imagine having to, like, do a 5 letter word? Nope. Nope.
Nope. Nope. Nope. Like the time that all of a sudden, you made a fun game stressful and long. And really long. And then people are gonna be mad. Like like like like like, make your fucking word already, would you? Right?
Right? Oh my god. Please don't buy that game for the
I'm not gonna buy it. I'm not gonna buy it. I don't support words.
I don't support it either. Right?
I don't support scrabble for the same reason. No. Right? Scrabble was popular because there were no other games. Mhmm. That's why we had it. Yep. That's all I gotta say about that, Samantha. Oh my god.
