Clap On, Clap Off: The Nuisance Neutralizer

Lisa [00:00:06]:
You ever have one of those days where you just wish you could make people magically disappear, Samantha?

Samantha [00:00:12]:
All the time, Lisa.

Lisa [00:00:13]:
All the time. Right? Like, and I'm. People, places and things. I want them all. I want the ability to get rid of them all. You know what I think? I think we didn't take advantage of that 1990s invention. Clap on, clap off. That's what I want.

Lisa [00:00:27]:
We need to bring the clapper back so we can just clap on and clap off through the day. I feel life would be so much better.

Samantha [00:00:33]:
You want to clap on and clap off people? Like the lamp.

Lisa [00:00:38]:
Like the lamp. I want. It depends. Everybody. Nobody's excluded from the clapper. Nobody. I'm frustrated at the grocery store. Clap on, clap off.

Lisa [00:00:47]:
I'm frustrated at work. Clap on, clap off. I'm frustrated because the TV's too loud. Clap on, clap off. I want to clap on and clap off everything.

Samantha [00:00:57]:
Is it because you're lazy?

Lisa [00:00:59]:
Well, it could be. I mean, it probably. It probably feeds into that a little bit. I would just be a clap on, clap off maniac.

Samantha [00:01:06]:
Okay? So I'm sorry, the one who is sainted and has a halo above her head, right. Wants to clap on and clap off.

Lisa [00:01:15]:
People, places and things annoy her and places and things.

Samantha [00:01:20]:
But apparently, Lisa, according to you, you don't get annoyed and you're like, everybody's friend.

Lisa [00:01:25]:
I am. Everyone loves you and they do.

Samantha [00:01:29]:
La, la, la, la, la.

Lisa [00:01:30]:
You sound like bitterness. Clap on, clap off. You right now, right? I feel I would use it a lot with you, actually.

Samantha [00:01:40]:
Actually, it would be great for you. You start nattering. I'm like, right, she's not going away.

Lisa [00:01:48]:
People would just think, what are these two up to? They're just clapping their hands randomly at everything, right?

Samantha [00:01:54]:
Lady starts talking to you, clap on, clap on. Go away.

Lisa [00:01:56]:
Right? Just back off, back off.

Samantha [00:01:59]:
Right? So it's like. Is it. Would it be like a silent dome all of a sudden? There's like this invisible, like, barrier where you. It's soundproof and you no longer can hear people.

Lisa [00:02:08]:
Totally, right? And you're just, clap on, clap off. Right. I feel we didn't take advantage of that. Like, the 1990s were all about that, right? That old lady in the commercial in her bedroom wanting the lights up. Clap on, clap off from bed. Let's just amp it up. Let's do people, places and things. Clap on, clap off.

Lisa [00:02:24]:
Right. Dog pooping in the front yard. Clap on, clap off. I don't need that in my life.

Samantha [00:02:28]:
Oh, my God. Is this a Dr. Seuss book people, places and things, how to clap them on and how to clap them on.

Lisa [00:02:35]:
Right. I feel that if we amp up that invention, bring it back, bring it back. Like, all things come back, bring it back, and just make it bigger than ever.

Samantha [00:02:47]:
Well, with all of the new technology out there, I have no doubt that somebody probably could insert a chip into your neck that connects to something, and it's like, right.

Lisa [00:02:58]:
It's all we would do. And then it would just depend on your place or. Right. It would just depend on what you do.

Samantha [00:03:05]:
Oh, my God.

Lisa [00:03:07]:
Right? Clap on, clap off. You've heard it here, friends. You've heard it here.

Samantha [00:03:10]:
I'm just wondering how your Tuesday, which really was Monday, has. Was going.

Lisa [00:03:15]:
I'm not always a fan of Tuesdays, which really are Mondays. Right. Because here's the whole thing, right? Maybe clap on, clap off the short week, because it's not really that. Yeah, I get. We lose a day, but we have to pack everything that we lost into the next day that we're back. So then it's the world's busiest day.

Samantha [00:03:34]:
So Tuesday, the world's busiest week.

Lisa [00:03:37]:
Totally the world's busiest week, right?

Samantha [00:03:39]:
Because hump day is really Tuesday, and Tuesday is usually really busy, and Wednesday tends to be really busy. That means Thursday is going to be busy, right? And I'm like, I don't need Friday to be busy because Friday at noon, everybody's like, I'm checked out.

Lisa [00:03:51]:
They're clapping off, right? They're clapping off, right? But that's the, like, that's the thing with. That's the thing when you have a holiday, because. And then the thing is, is that the week before we. We bust our ass to get everything done so we can take that day, right? So it's two weeks. Two busy, busy weeks back to back. I don't need that. Clap on, clap off. Don't need that.

Lisa [00:04:12]:
Right?

Samantha [00:04:14]:
If only it were that simple.

Lisa [00:04:16]:
Only it was that easy only, right?

Samantha [00:04:20]:
But Lisa, Samantha, let's get to it.

Lisa [00:04:23]:
Let's get this podcast going.

Samantha [00:04:25]:
All right. Welcome to another episode of I Shake My Head with Lisa and Sam. And if you don't know who we are, shame on you.

Lisa [00:04:32]:
Shame. Shame. Clap on, clap off. You. Actually, no, we're gonna clap you back on because we want you to get to know us, right? Hello, friends of the podcast.

Samantha [00:04:41]:
Hello, everybody.

Lisa [00:04:43]:
Oh, Samantha.

Samantha [00:04:45]:
As I shame the people that are.

Lisa [00:04:46]:
Listening to us, right. And shaming the new fans we don't even have yet, but we're hoping for.

Samantha [00:04:52]:
Now, guys, you're here. So you must love what you hear.

Lisa [00:04:55]:
So.

Samantha [00:04:56]:
So how about download, subscribe, and share with a friend? Just a suggestion. Throwing it out there to the world. And then while you're doing that, leave a review.

Lisa [00:05:07]:
Leave a review.

Samantha [00:05:08]:
You know, we got our website, ishakemyhead podge.com.

Lisa [00:05:12]:
Right?

Samantha [00:05:13]:
So check it out.

Lisa [00:05:15]:
Check it out. Just check it out. Right? I feel that it's not getting the traffic that it deserves.

Samantha [00:05:24]:
Lisa never thinks it's getting the traffic it deserves.

Lisa [00:05:27]:
I just want so much traffic. Friends of the podcast, you should know this by now, I think.

Samantha [00:05:31]:
I feel like you guys really need to know that she needs validation in her world. So, please, can you help a girl out?

Lisa [00:05:37]:
Just help a girl.

Samantha [00:05:38]:
This will help make her very happy.

Lisa [00:05:40]:
Yeah. And, you know, and Sam gets happy too, right?

Samantha [00:05:43]:
I. I'm actually just relieved somebody said something.

Lisa [00:05:48]:
They like us. They really, really like us.

Samantha [00:05:51]:
Yes. Lisa gets very excited.

Lisa [00:05:54]:
Totally. Totally.

Samantha [00:05:56]:
Right? The whole bed.

Lisa [00:05:59]:
The whole bed. Okay. So we were out the other night. Guy stands up, walks away.

Samantha [00:06:07]:
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Lisa [00:06:09]:
I'm looking at. I'm looking at him because that's what I do, right? I judge. And I'm looking at the back of his head, and I take great care to make sure that the back of my head is put together. Right? I got the mirror in the mirror, the whole bit, right? Dude stands.

Samantha [00:06:29]:
Nancy would say that. You would. You would be. You're obsessed. You're obsessed with the back of your head.

Lisa [00:06:34]:
I am totally right. Because when you have short hair, you can. You can get it. It can part weirdly in the middle. It can look like you just woke up on it. So you got to take care of back there, right? Gotta take care. Dude stands up. He's not taking care back there.

Lisa [00:06:48]:
And what did I say? Why don't some people care about the back of their heads? Because he's nice looking here. Train wreck there, right?

Samantha [00:06:58]:
Yeah. He actually had a piece of hair that was kind of flopping around. And I'm like, oh, dude, you didn't even. You didn't put a comb through that, right? You did not even put a comb through that.

Lisa [00:07:07]:
That's. I woke up hair. Had to go on a date. Woke up hair and didn't brush the back of it, right?

Samantha [00:07:14]:
Oh, it was a little bit sad.

Lisa [00:07:17]:
It was really bad. So that's my. This. This is my. This is my public service announcement, dear people, pay attention to the back of your hair, because guess what? People see the back of your head more than they probably see the front of your head, right? Because you're always walking away from people and I'm always. I'm all over that like a dirty shirt.

Samantha [00:07:40]:
You are. You're very obsessed. I will say that. Anybody ever needs a mirror. Lisa. She got one. It's a purse.

Lisa [00:07:46]:
Got one.

Samantha [00:07:47]:
She's got one in her gigantic unorganized sloppers.

Lisa [00:07:50]:
Stop it. Do we need to go there this week? Yes. We really?

Samantha [00:07:56]:
Oh my God. Yes. It is very sloppy and organized, but she will have a mirror.

Lisa [00:08:01]:
I'll have a mirror.

Samantha [00:08:02]:
A dirty Kleenex. And a dirty Kleenex.

Lisa [00:08:03]:
And a dirty Kleenex. Right. Totally. I will have those things and old Tic Tacs.

Samantha [00:08:09]:
Oh God, yes you will. And then she'll. She'll. She'll go, oh my God, I can't find my keys. And it'll take her five minutes to rummage around in her entirely unorganized purse.

Lisa [00:08:21]:
Cuz it's just.

Samantha [00:08:22]:
It's just fine. Said keys.

Lisa [00:08:23]:
It's a bag of.

Samantha [00:08:24]:
Oh, they're in my pocket.

Lisa [00:08:28]:
Right. Because I'm almost 56 and I'm starting to lose my mind.

Samantha [00:08:32]:
Yeah, we're all losing our marble, right? Yep.

Lisa [00:08:34]:
Because that's the thing, right? We hit. I'm not going to say it's brain fog, because I don't think it's that. I just think once. No, I don't think so. I think once you hit us.

Samantha [00:08:41]:
Oh my God. Just because you have.

Lisa [00:08:43]:
I don't think it is.

Samantha [00:08:44]:
What I think it isn't true.

Lisa [00:08:47]:
No, what I think it is is I think once you hit a certain age, your memory just. It just deletes shit it don't need because it's okay.

Samantha [00:08:56]:
Menopause and the, and the lack of hormones that we are experiencing does affect and give us brain fog, which makes us all like, raw.

Lisa [00:09:04]:
I don't feel like I have a.

Samantha [00:09:05]:
Little anxiety and then on one good day you're like, I can handle this. And the next day, same thing. I'm gonna hurt someone. Because your hormones are up and then they're down.

Lisa [00:09:16]:
That's why we need.

Samantha [00:09:16]:
And then they're.

Lisa [00:09:17]:
That's why you need to clap on, clap off. Maybe that's the key to menopause right there. Clap on, clap off. Right?

Samantha [00:09:25]:
Oh yeah. Some hormone therapy. Clap on that hormone therapy. Clap it off when you don't need it.

Lisa [00:09:29]:
Totally. When you don't need it, right? Clap it on. Clap it off.

Samantha [00:09:32]:
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Lisa [00:09:33]:
I don't. I feel like my hormones are in check. I just feel that my brain is deleting things. It doesn't care about anymore. That's all.

Samantha [00:09:38]:
Oh, well, that's true.

Lisa [00:09:39]:
Right? That's all. That's, you know, you call it what you want, I'll call it what I want, right? And we'll just go along our merry way.

Samantha [00:09:50]:
Okay. All right. I do need to mention something.

Lisa [00:09:52]:
You're gonna pick at me right now, aren't you?

Samantha [00:09:55]:
I have to tell everybody.

Lisa [00:09:56]:
Oh, my God.

Samantha [00:09:57]:
It's kind of funny.

Lisa [00:10:00]:
And I'm not taking a picture.

Samantha [00:10:01]:
I. I dropped off. I dropped. I dropped off Lisa last week after we had our dinner, and it was warm enough that she decided she ain't wearing a sock. And she was wearing her very fun hipster carpentry pants.

Lisa [00:10:20]:
Cargo. They're cargo.

Samantha [00:10:23]:
Carpentry cargo. Acid wash carpentry pants.

Lisa [00:10:26]:
Cargo pants.

Samantha [00:10:27]:
And I. I'm getting ready to turn and make a ui. And I. Out of the corner, my eye, I see a splash of white. I'm like, what the is that? Oh, my God. It's her chicken ankle. Like, I don't even know. Is it.

Samantha [00:10:43]:
Is it. Is it a leg? Is it an ankle? It looked like hardcore bone. I'm like, how do you stand with that? It's like, you can see it. You can see the bone. And I'm like, you're good. You could. You could snap it like a twig.

Lisa [00:10:59]:
But think of it this way.

Samantha [00:11:00]:
Snap it like a twig.

Lisa [00:11:01]:
So, friends of the podcast, it's my Achilles tendon that she's talking about. That's what she's talking about. My Achilles. And yes, it's very tiny. You know what? It's funny. When I get outta the car in the morning at work, Mike's always like, watch your Achilles. I'm like, it's fine. Those Achilles.

Lisa [00:11:17]:
I must have the strongest Achilles tendons in the world. Cause look what they're holding up.

Samantha [00:11:21]:
It's. It's. It's an. It's an amazing feat because I was, like, walking away. I'm like, okay. Not only are they really white, because.

Lisa [00:11:28]:
They haven't seen lovely acid watch.

Samantha [00:11:30]:
Carpenter pants.

Lisa [00:11:31]:
Cargo. Cargo.

Samantha [00:11:35]:
And then. And then the shoe itself looked so big compared to that tiny little ankle with the skinny little bone. And I'm like, I don't know how she's doing this. I have no idea.

Lisa [00:11:46]:
It's amazing.

Samantha [00:11:47]:
Like, I felt. I laughed all the way home. But I was like, I need to. To share this, because I was astounded by what I.

Lisa [00:11:58]:
Friends of the podcast, if you ever see me out in public, take a look. You'll see it. But I'm not Taking a picture of it.

Samantha [00:12:06]:
Because that would just be a creepy, weird photo.

Lisa [00:12:08]:
A creepy, weird photo. Right.

Samantha [00:12:10]:
Why would you like ankles?

Lisa [00:12:11]:
Who, like, who likes ankles?

Samantha [00:12:13]:
Oh, but could we make some money off of it?

Lisa [00:12:14]:
Off my ankles?

Samantha [00:12:15]:
Because then I'd be interested.

Lisa [00:12:16]:
Well, you know, they are. They are tiny. They're tiny ankles. Right? Maybe even my legs.

Samantha [00:12:22]:
Nothing to look at. No, we can't. It is really just like.

Lisa [00:12:26]:
Or like, from the knee down. I have good legs. I have good legs.

Samantha [00:12:32]:
But nobody needs to see your feet.

Lisa [00:12:34]:
No, Right. No. No. There's no foot fetish happening with this girl. Nobody's coming for that.

Samantha [00:12:39]:
There's money to be made out of this. From, like, somehow. Somehow there's money.

Lisa [00:12:43]:
We'll figure it out, Samantha. All right.

Samantha [00:12:45]:
All right.

Lisa [00:12:46]:
We'll figure it out. Okay. There. So you feel better? You got that off your chest.

Samantha [00:12:50]:
It was funny.

Lisa [00:12:51]:
They're going to be with me all summer, so just. You're going to see a lot of them, Right? Right. They're roaming free. Those. Those Achilles tendons are those little chicken legs. They're just getting skinny. They're just skinny little legs. I don't know how they do it.

Lisa [00:13:05]:
It's amazing. Okay, but listen, I got a nice. Shake my head. I hate vacuuming. And I figured out why I hate vacuuming. Because they don't make a cord that you can just plug into one place in your home and go throughout everywhere. That's what I hate about vacuum. I shake my head at the fact that to vacuum, you have to plug the cord in six different places.

Lisa [00:13:28]:
Why can't they just make a cord that stretches everywhere?

Samantha [00:13:31]:
Well, that would be really long, but.

Lisa [00:13:33]:
It would be really good.

Samantha [00:13:35]:
I don't think that's practical.

Lisa [00:13:37]:
Why you like. Like, that drives me crazy. You just start, you're getting into your groove, right? Vacuuming up a storm, and all of a sudden it unplugs. Oh, that's right. Because now I've gone. I've gone past the magic limit and I've gone too far.

Samantha [00:13:51]:
I feel like this is the test of your patience and your laziness all wrapped into one little bow.

Lisa [00:13:57]:
Clap on, clap off. Right? Right.

Samantha [00:14:03]:
Oh, my God.

Lisa [00:14:04]:
I shake my head at vacuum cords. All right.

Samantha [00:14:07]:
I mean, that's legit, right? It's legit vacuuming. Annoying to begin with. Short cords, super annoying.

Lisa [00:14:14]:
So you know what it makes me do? Stop and I'm done vacuuming. So not every room gets vacuumed. I'm over it. Totally over it by then, right? Totally done.

Samantha [00:14:25]:
Oh, my God.

Lisa [00:14:26]:
Okay. Yeah.

Samantha [00:14:27]:
All right. That's how this girl rolls, as Mike would say. You're doing a ha job.

Lisa [00:14:31]:
Totally half assed job. Yeah. Not my fault though. Not my fault. I'm prepared to do a full good job. It's on the vacuum. That one is. Okay.

Lisa [00:14:41]:
Not on me. Not on me, Samantha.

Samantha [00:14:46]:
Okay, well, I have, oddly enough. I don't know, maybe it's because I was cleaning yesterday, but I haven't. I shake my head about cleaning, but I. It's about putting off cleaning until the very last few hours of your last day off before you have to go back to work.

Lisa [00:14:59]:
And then you hate it even more, right?

Samantha [00:15:01]:
And then, and then I hate it even more. And then I'm like even more angry that I have to do it. And I'm like, well, I'm the only one that lives here, so I don't know who else is going to do it.

Lisa [00:15:08]:
Right.

Samantha [00:15:09]:
Because I'm not paying a cleaning lady to clean up my four by four space. But I was just like, I'm gonna, I, I, I, I want to change my habit.

Lisa [00:15:20]:
But you won't. You won't.

Samantha [00:15:22]:
But I can't. And I'm like. Because it's like, oh, I look forward to like my day off and two sleeping days and I'm just so excited about it.

Lisa [00:15:31]:
Right. And you're watching TV on the couch.

Samantha [00:15:34]:
Yeah. And I'm just doing nothing or just nothing to do with cleaning. And I'm doing everything else but that and the easy stuff, the dishwasher. Because I don't, I don't have to like physically do that stuff.

Lisa [00:15:45]:
Right, Right. Everything else I have to do. Everything else you have to do. Right. Bathroom. That's on you.

Samantha [00:15:51]:
Dusting. That's on me. Vacuuming. On me, you know, making my bed, putting on new sheet. All the stuff. Right.

Lisa [00:15:58]:
All on you. Sucks. All on you. Right.

Samantha [00:16:00]:
I want. So I'm shaking my head at me.

Lisa [00:16:03]:
Because you have shitty habits.

Samantha [00:16:05]:
Because I have shitty habits and I need to change it.

Lisa [00:16:07]:
But you won't change it.

Samantha [00:16:09]:
I won't.

Lisa [00:16:10]:
You won't. Because you're a pregnant.

Samantha [00:16:11]:
I know that about me.

Lisa [00:16:12]:
I know that.

Samantha [00:16:13]:
Oh, I am a bit, A bit of a procrastinator.

Lisa [00:16:15]:
Right?

Samantha [00:16:15]:
Especially procrastinator.

Lisa [00:16:17]:
Especially when you get your Netflix going. Right?

Samantha [00:16:20]:
Oh, well, especially if there's a good.

Lisa [00:16:21]:
Show like, like anybody who can sit and watch the full season on Saturday. Hi. You got bad shitty habits.

Samantha [00:16:32]:
No, I don't have shitty habits. I have Netflix and chill habits.

Lisa [00:16:36]:
No, it's Netflix.

Samantha [00:16:37]:
This is Covid. I can't get over it.

Lisa [00:16:38]:
This is what Netflix addicted habits.

Samantha [00:16:40]:
This is what Covid did to me.

Lisa [00:16:42]:
This is. So you're blaming Covid?

Samantha [00:16:44]:
I am.

Lisa [00:16:45]:
Covid's the bad guy.

Samantha [00:16:46]:
Covid. Oh, I have an excuse.

Lisa [00:16:47]:
Covid's the bad guy.

Samantha [00:16:50]:
Clap on.

Lisa [00:16:52]:
Oh, I don't know, Samantha. It just kind of makes me shake my head at you, actually.

Samantha [00:16:55]:
Whatever. Whatever.

Lisa [00:16:57]:
So we went and we had breakfast on Saturday, right? I woke up craving eggs Benny. I told you that, right? I said, I'm gonna have eggs Benny. Super excited. You know what? Nothing is worse than when you're super excited. But to end up being totally disappointed, I.

Samantha [00:17:16]:
It wasn't the best.

Lisa [00:17:18]:
I felt that there was no taste in the. Benny.

Samantha [00:17:21]:
I didn't like the coffee either.

Lisa [00:17:23]:
No, it's breakfast.

Samantha [00:17:25]:
It was, like, a bad experience. It wasn't a bad experience. It was just. It wasn't. The. Like, the last time we went there, it was good. Last time, it was like, the coffee was off.

Lisa [00:17:34]:
Everything was off.

Samantha [00:17:35]:
Were off. Yeah, everything was off.

Lisa [00:17:37]:
Like when you order eggs Benedict, right? Like, you want to taste that lemony flavor of the sauce. Not what they had on. That was not right. The right color. Red color. And then it just kind of made me frustrated because I'm like, God, I should have got pancakes or the French toast. When in doubt, syrup never does me wrong. Syrup never.

Lisa [00:18:00]:
Never lets me down. Syrup is all. Syrup's got my back.

Samantha [00:18:04]:
Well, honestly, like an omelette or like, just normal eggs over easy eggs never let you down.

Lisa [00:18:10]:
Never let you down. And that's the problem with eggs Benedict, right? Like, my mom used to make the best eggs Benedict in the world, and my kid's sister can replicate it. Right? I can't, because I don't cook. Right. But that's the problem with eggs Benedict is that you have high expectations for it. And if it's not delivered, you're just disappointed beyond belief.

Samantha [00:18:29]:
Right? Actually, Michelle makes a really good eggs Benedict.

Lisa [00:18:31]:
HHG makes delicious eggs Benedict. That's right. She. Because she's a mom. I think that's part of it, right?

Samantha [00:18:37]:
Yeah. But she does a little bearnaise sauce in her hollandaise sauce.

Lisa [00:18:40]:
Yeah, she does. She mixes it up a bit.

Samantha [00:18:42]:
That's a little. Little bit of a trick, right?

Lisa [00:18:44]:
That's her trick. So I'm just saying, right? It was disappointing. Disappointing.

Samantha [00:18:48]:
It was disappointing.

Lisa [00:18:49]:
And we'd love a breakfast.

Samantha [00:18:51]:
And we do. We do. That's. You know, that's why we go out on Saturdays, because, you know, that's. Brey.

Lisa [00:18:56]:
I want a big breakfast.

Samantha [00:18:58]:
Well, now we know better because we know where we should be getting our eggs Benedict.

Lisa [00:19:02]:
We do. And this is our conversation all the time. Do we like their eggs Benedict? Right. We're never like. It's never like.

Samantha [00:19:09]:
Yeah, okay, so name the place that you think has the best end. Eggs Benedict.

Lisa [00:19:16]:
Oh, it's probably chorus.

Samantha [00:19:18]:
Yes.

Lisa [00:19:18]:
Right.

Samantha [00:19:19]:
And it costs you an arm, a leg, and a toe.

Lisa [00:19:22]:
Right?

Samantha [00:19:23]:
Right.

Lisa [00:19:24]:
It's a $40 breakfast.

Samantha [00:19:26]:
It's a $40 breakfast. Nobody should pay $40 for a breakfast.

Lisa [00:19:29]:
Not for breakfast. Right. That's most of supper. That's most of supper.

Samantha [00:19:33]:
Yeah.

Lisa [00:19:33]:
Right.

Samantha [00:19:33]:
But I mean, it is. It is one of the best.

Lisa [00:19:37]:
It's a good. It's a good Benny. It's a good Benny.

Samantha [00:19:39]:
It is good Benny.

Lisa [00:19:40]:
I don't know. Maybe that's the Lord saying, girls, no bennies. Right. Stick to the syrup. Right. Stick to what? You know, Lisa. Stick to the syrup. Right.

Samantha [00:19:49]:
Well, and then I was just like, you know what? I should have had the seniors menu because then I wouldn't have felt too ripped off because it would have been like, Exactly. Just only half of a Benny and a half of the money.

Lisa [00:20:01]:
Right. So then you wouldn't have felt as bad. But, but. But it was still a good thing because what were we doing? We were working on our show.

Samantha [00:20:09]:
Yes, Lisa. We are gearing up for the Bare bones tour on Aug. 16 in Collingwood. The show is starting to take shape, folks, and we're excited to bring it to life.

Lisa [00:20:19]:
Excited.

Samantha [00:20:19]:
Stay tuned. Ticket info is coming soon.

Lisa [00:20:22]:
It's coming soon. It's coming soon.

Samantha [00:20:24]:
Just a reminder, we got an outline. This is people pleaser. Lisa asked.

Lisa [00:20:29]:
We got points. Yeah, absolutely.

Samantha [00:20:32]:
Those of you who are from the.

Lisa [00:20:34]:
Ontario area, we're asking you to come to the show.

Samantha [00:20:37]:
Come on out.

Lisa [00:20:38]:
I don't feel bad about asking people to come to the show at all. Right.

Samantha [00:20:42]:
She'll be so sad if no one shows up.

Lisa [00:20:44]:
Oh, my God. Right? My heart can't have that in my life, people.

Samantha [00:20:47]:
That is a clap on, clap on, clap on, clap off moment. That is just not something I need.

Lisa [00:20:53]:
You totally will have to deal with that.

Samantha [00:20:55]:
I totally, totally.

Lisa [00:20:56]:
You'll have to deal with that.

Samantha [00:20:58]:
I don't know. Because she always asks me, like, my eye. And I'm like, I don't have any more answers than you. I. Why do you look at me and think you have answers? And I'm like, I have none. The thing is, zero.

Lisa [00:21:09]:
Do you know what, Samantha? I got faith. I got faith in our people.

Samantha [00:21:12]:
I got faith, too.

Lisa [00:21:13]:
They're coming they're going to come. They're just like, stop talking about it and just do it.

Samantha [00:21:17]:
Yeah, stop talking about it. That's. That's the good idea.

Lisa [00:21:20]:
But we're not going to stop talking about it. Okay, you know what? We need to talk. This. We need to talk about it fully engulfed my weekend. I'm going to say something and I don't want.

Samantha [00:21:31]:
People don't know.

Lisa [00:21:33]:
Listen. Yes.

Samantha [00:21:34]:
Just.

Lisa [00:21:35]:
I just. I have an announcement.

Samantha [00:21:36]:
A riot. Hatred towards us.

Lisa [00:21:39]:
I'm not.

Samantha [00:21:39]:
Because people really like this guy.

Lisa [00:21:41]:
I know. I do, too. I do, too. I made this announcement at my work today. Told my boss and my boss boss, in case anybody's wondering, I'm totally a Roman Catholic by proxy right now. I bought in. I'm learning. I'm just not doing the work right.

Lisa [00:21:57]:
Totally. I'm in it to win it. Me and the Pope. I got this taste. Right? My Pope died. Our Pope died.

Samantha [00:22:06]:
Yes.

Lisa [00:22:06]:
Right. He died.

Samantha [00:22:07]:
The people. The people's Pope has passed.

Lisa [00:22:10]:
Yes. He met J.D. vance and he had a stroke and died.

Samantha [00:22:15]:
He was like, I can't be around for this.

Lisa [00:22:18]:
I can't do this.

Samantha [00:22:18]:
I gotta go.

Lisa [00:22:19]:
I can't do. I'm tapping out. Clap on, clap off. Pope clapped on and clapped off and he left. Right. Right. Dear J.D. vance.

Samantha [00:22:30]:
Yeah.

Lisa [00:22:31]:
You might have killed the Pope.

Samantha [00:22:32]:
He might have.

Lisa [00:22:33]:
Right. But I'm learning so much. Eh? Like a lot. I knew from the member when Pope John Paul died.

Samantha [00:22:39]:
Yes. You were very invested in that.

Lisa [00:22:41]:
I'm back. I'm just as invested. Just as invested. I might even watch the movie the Conclave. Not sure.

Samantha [00:22:46]:
I've already watched it. It's. It is. You'll love it. It's got a little bit of everything. It's very cloak and dagger. Is for being like guys in a room.

Lisa [00:22:57]:
Sure. Like, sure.

Samantha [00:22:58]:
It's pretty good.

Lisa [00:22:58]:
Yeah.

Samantha [00:22:59]:
I will. I. I will. I will give that two thumbs up because I was quite surprised. And I was like, okay, I got nothing to do. And it's, you know, I'm feeling like I need to have some spiritualness. And I'm like, so I watch Conclave and it has nothing to do with spirituality and everything to do with humanity.

Lisa [00:23:15]:
My phone has been blowing up. Right. I signed up to get notifications. So things like today, like, oh, they put wax on his door so nobody can go into his apartment. Ding, ding, ding. Notification. Oh. Gotta learn a little bit about that.

Samantha [00:23:28]:
Yeah. You're not allowed to go in there after he's dead.

Lisa [00:23:30]:
No. Right. They're gonna smash his ring because nobody else can have it.

Samantha [00:23:34]:
Nope.

Lisa [00:23:35]:
Right. We are in mourning right now, Samantha. So you're. You're people who loved the Pope. Kind of believe ya. I kind of. I get it.

Samantha [00:23:45]:
Oh, my God.

Lisa [00:23:46]:
Don't get me wrong. I don't get all parts of it.

Samantha [00:23:47]:
Reports. We're about to get reports from Lisa on the conclave.

Lisa [00:23:52]:
I'm learning. I'm learning. I knew about it last time. I'm just learning some more. Like their history is hundreds and hundreds of years old.

Samantha [00:24:01]:
Yes, Lisa.

Lisa [00:24:02]:
Not to mention, I also watched a show on CNN this weekend, Samantha. And because it was Easter, it was on the shroud. Yeah, that was a cool show. Then I watched the Book of Judas. Totally religious by proxy right now. Totally. Pencil me in.

Samantha [00:24:20]:
I will give you. I will give you this. When you get excited about something, you dive all in. You're all in.

Lisa [00:24:25]:
I'm all in it, folks.

Samantha [00:24:26]:
I'm all in until it's done, and then I'm over it.

Lisa [00:24:29]:
Right? I'm in it. I'm totally in it. So anybody needs to know anything, let me know.

Samantha [00:24:35]:
This is totally your addictive personality.

Lisa [00:24:38]:
I watched it all weekend.

Samantha [00:24:40]:
Yes, because this is what you do with all things. You dive in and then you consume it, and then you're done with it.

Lisa [00:24:47]:
Then I will be done.

Samantha [00:24:48]:
What you do with food, this is what you do with your favorite snacks.

Lisa [00:24:51]:
I love.

Samantha [00:24:52]:
I'm all in. I need it right now. For a week. Every day for a week. And then you're like. And I'm done.

Lisa [00:24:57]:
Right? Because I love really hard. I love hard. I love hard. Right? And then I stick it to the curb, because then I'm over it. Right? But we're gonna get a new pope.

Samantha [00:25:08]:
We're on. Maybe he'll be younger.

Lisa [00:25:10]:
Oh, wouldn't that be nice? But he's not gonna get a younger pope.

Samantha [00:25:14]:
No.

Lisa [00:25:15]:
He's like.

Samantha [00:25:15]:
Like, if you watch the movie Conclave, that's never gonna happen, Right?

Lisa [00:25:19]:
It's never gonna happen. I don't think it ever is gonna happen.

Samantha [00:25:21]:
These guys are super old.

Lisa [00:25:23]:
I think they need the popes to die.

Samantha [00:25:26]:
Well, I mean. I mean, I don't think they want the popes to die. No.

Lisa [00:25:30]:
But I think they get old people so they'll die. Because then all of a sudden, it's like the whole full circle thing, right? And then he died.

Samantha [00:25:37]:
Because they can. Well, I mean, if they're really thinking about it. I mean, Pope Francis was only our pope for 10 years.

Lisa [00:25:45]:
Maybe 10 to 12.

Samantha [00:25:46]:
Maybe he started it when he was 78, and he died at 88.

Lisa [00:25:50]:
So it was so. And that was like, old. And then the guy before him, the German Pope, I think. I think there were some secrets there. He retired. Right. I'm going. I'm putting it out there.

Lisa [00:26:01]:
I'm learning. I feel that there were some secrets. Him and his little red shoes. Right. It was just kind of weird. But I'm just saying. Right. My heart goes out to all those who love the Pope.

Lisa [00:26:10]:
Yes. Right. Interesting.

Samantha [00:26:12]:
I'm with you. I'm there. I'm not as invested as you are.

Lisa [00:26:16]:
Totally invested. So, Saturday. Busy Saturday.

Samantha [00:26:18]:
Right.

Lisa [00:26:18]:
I have a funeral to go to. Right. I have a mass, apparently. I'm going to go to Mass.

Samantha [00:26:24]:
You're going to go to Mass?

Lisa [00:26:25]:
You're going to go to Mass?

Samantha [00:26:26]:
It's going to be long.

Lisa [00:26:27]:
They say it's going to be two and a half hours. Right. It's a long service.

Samantha [00:26:30]:
Bring snacks.

Lisa [00:26:31]:
Right. Well, at least I'll be at home. I can have some popcorn or something like that.

Samantha [00:26:36]:
Could you imagine being in the church?

Lisa [00:26:37]:
No.

Samantha [00:26:38]:
And sitting there for two and a half hours, it's like, don't you dare eat anything. You better go pee before you sit down, because you ain't going nowhere for two and a half hours.

Lisa [00:26:45]:
That's the beauty of being Catholic by proxy. Right. You don't have to do all of that, so you don't have to really put the work in. Right.

Samantha [00:26:52]:
Oh, my God. Do you think they wear depends to go in there just on the off chance that they might have to pee.

Lisa [00:26:56]:
Because they're all old. They're probably in. They're probably in their Depends years anyways.

Samantha [00:27:01]:
Well, I mean, the crowd is, you.

Lisa [00:27:02]:
Know, a certain age and like, all the cardinals just saying they're old. Right. I'm sure. Oh, for sure.

Samantha [00:27:08]:
Everyone's. Everyone's flocking to the funeral. Hey.

Lisa [00:27:11]:
Oh, yeah, Right. Totally. Flocks and flocks of flocks and flocks of people. How exciting. Okay.

Samantha [00:27:18]:
But let's go from flocks to crocs. Did you like my segue?

Lisa [00:27:22]:
That was a good segue. She's been practicing.

Samantha [00:27:25]:
I've been practicing. I'm starting to see lots of socks. With crocs.

Lisa [00:27:29]:
Just means it's summer.

Samantha [00:27:31]:
Oh. I saw them in the wild over the weekend with you, Lisa. And I'm like, okay. And then I'm thinking, are we missing something?

Lisa [00:27:39]:
I don't know.

Samantha [00:27:40]:
We're missing a key component.

Lisa [00:27:41]:
Like, I don't want to crocs. I don't want to believe that we are. But there was families, like, and I'M like, and the kid and the mom and the dad. It's like, maybe because we don't have families, maybe we're excluded from the socks with crocs.

Samantha [00:27:55]:
I don't.

Lisa [00:27:55]:
It seems because they seem to travel, they seem to travel in packs. Socks with crocs, right?

Samantha [00:28:00]:
They do, right?

Lisa [00:28:01]:
Like, like they're in groups. They're in groups, groups. Socks with croc groups.

Samantha [00:28:06]:
And maybe don't know how to make crocs. Not just a plastic shoe that.

Lisa [00:28:14]:
Remember, Remember last summer at my sister's because they are a family with crocs. I don't know if they do socks, but they do crocs. And remember I put those crocs on and I'm like, they hurt my feet. They've got like some prickly thing on. I'm like, what enjoyment is this? Because they hurt like, what? Why, why is there prickles on the bottom of my feet?

Samantha [00:28:35]:
I don't understand. And why are there holes on the top?

Lisa [00:28:38]:
I don't know. I guess cuz when you're in a rubber shoe, it needs to breathe.

Samantha [00:28:42]:
It should, it should breathe, right?

Lisa [00:28:45]:
It's like I saw on the morning show, one of the morning shows last week that the jelly shoe, remember the jellies from like the 80s?

Samantha [00:28:52]:
Yes.

Lisa [00:28:52]:
They're making, they're a big trend for the summer. They have fancy jellies, bedazzled jellies. At the end of the day, it's still just a bendable, twistable rubber shoe that when you walk sounds like it's farting.

Samantha [00:29:05]:
Right?

Lisa [00:29:06]:
Right. Like why are we wearing plastic shoes? Why are we doing this? Samantha?

Samantha [00:29:13]:
I don't know, but I hate this season for you because you get internal, you get internally obsessed, totally with everything.

Lisa [00:29:20]:
Everything.

Samantha [00:29:20]:
It's your shoe, it's your pant. It's. It's when you're gonna get a tan, when you're gonna have not a tan. What do I look like? I look fat? I look thin? I need to. And this, you've been on your diet craze for like months now. I'm like, you need to stop.

Lisa [00:29:36]:
I'm on it. I'm still on it.

Samantha [00:29:38]:
It's, it's just, it's too much. Clap on, clap off, clap on, clap off.

Lisa [00:29:43]:
Listen, I was looking at my hands today and I'm like, I see freckles wanting to come out. I see them. That means they need a patio because they need the sun.

Samantha [00:29:54]:
It's called age spots.

Lisa [00:29:55]:
No, they're not. They're my summer freckles. Remember, Remember my face last summer. Remember? It was all freckly.

Samantha [00:30:01]:
Yes, because you. Your freckles finally popped out and made you look like you had a tan.

Lisa [00:30:06]:
Right? It's time. Like, next week is May, my friend.

Samantha [00:30:11]:
Oh, my God.

Lisa [00:30:12]:
Right? It's like we need to plan Fridays off. We need to plan beach days, the whole bit.

Samantha [00:30:18]:
Oh, my God. Beach days. Nothing new.

Lisa [00:30:20]:
Yeah. Remember we used to go to the beach or the. Wherever we used to go.

Samantha [00:30:24]:
We don't go to the beach.

Lisa [00:30:26]:
We went to a beach.

Samantha [00:30:28]:
Where.

Lisa [00:30:29]:
Remember? Remember? And we had to drag everything down to the beach. What's near here?

Samantha [00:30:34]:
No, slow your roll.

Lisa [00:30:35]:
What?

Samantha [00:30:36]:
I dragged everything to the beach, okay?

Lisa [00:30:38]:
And you had to drag everything.

Samantha [00:30:39]:
You did nothing.

Lisa [00:30:40]:
Right? That's what I do as nothing. Right. Like, you know this already.

Samantha [00:30:49]:
We'll see, right?

Lisa [00:30:50]:
It's time to start thinking in. In terms of chocolate brownness.

Samantha [00:30:53]:
See, guys? See, right? And Obsessions. Chocolate brown tan. You don't get chocolate brown to try, though.

Lisa [00:30:59]:
But I'm going to try again.

Samantha [00:31:01]:
Red. And then you burn your feet, and then you put them in the water and the water freezes them. Then you get hypothermia or something.

Lisa [00:31:07]:
They get shocked.

Samantha [00:31:08]:
Your toes go black. And then.

Lisa [00:31:11]:
Then I got to wear those shoes that are two sizes too big, that are office, and they're always my. After holiday shoes.

Samantha [00:31:17]:
There's just so many. You know, I. I know that there's nothing more than. Than you know, that you love is. Is the warmth and beauty of summer and sun and all that kind of stuff. It hates me, but it's. It's singular obsession about the color of your skin, the color of your hair, what you're wearing, what's on your feet.

Lisa [00:31:37]:
Totally.

Samantha [00:31:38]:
Like, it's just. Where can I have some sun? How come there's no sun, Sam? Why there's. And then I have to answer for the weather. And I'm like, why am I the. Oh, my God. I'm complaining.

Lisa [00:31:50]:
Oh, I'm gonna clap you on and off right now. Right? It's time to move on. Stop complaining about your best friend.

Samantha [00:31:56]:
I need a. I need a minute to collect myself. I'm gonna check myself. I'm gonna collect myself.

Lisa [00:32:02]:
It's just not that bad. Friends of the podcast.

Samantha [00:32:05]:
Okay, I exaggerate. All right.

Lisa [00:32:07]:
No, she totally. Right. Just when we're sitting on a patio, my one thing is that I don't need to sit under an umbrella.

Samantha [00:32:14]:
And then when she sits on patio, and then it's like, I need the direct sun. No, I want to sit in your seat. That has better sun. And then I trade because I don't give a shit. And then she's like, you got the better seat trade again. I'm like, oh, my God. This is like musical chairs. That never needed to happen.

Lisa [00:32:31]:
Totally. Right? It's fine. It makes it fun. Makes it fun. It's good times, Samantha. Good times.

Samantha [00:32:44]:
Okay, As a Gen X, we have the mindset that if it doesn't work out, it's not. It's not meant to be. And we move on. We move on.

Lisa [00:32:52]:
We don't stay and linger. We don't stay and linger.

Samantha [00:32:54]:
No. But the gen, the younger generations, they're persistent. Hey. They can't handle it. They can't handle it when something doesn't go their way.

Lisa [00:33:03]:
Really? So what do they do?

Samantha [00:33:04]:
Yeah, they just wait. They go back and they. And they just did. It's like, no, it has to be mine. No, you have to know. It has to be. I need people to give up.

Lisa [00:33:15]:
Give up.

Samantha [00:33:16]:
I need people to give up.

Lisa [00:33:17]:
Stop trying so hard.

Samantha [00:33:18]:
Because, guys, it's time to get a grip on reality. Nothing. Oh, not everything works out. I don't care what your parents told you. Swear to fucking God, I don't care. Life is hard and it sucks. And you won't always get your way, and you always. You won't always get what you want, but it's okay.

Lisa [00:33:39]:
That's okay.

Samantha [00:33:41]:
Because maybe the next time you will.

Lisa [00:33:43]:
Yeah.

Samantha [00:33:44]:
And stop being persistent. Stop bugging people. Stop it, get over it and move along. That's what I need you to do. I need you to move along.

Lisa [00:33:52]:
Okay, Totally.

Samantha [00:33:53]:
That's what I'm saying. That's my Gen X moment. I'm just. I'm done. Because as. As someone who is of an age, like, I'm going to be 57 this.

Lisa [00:34:04]:
Year, like, you're, like, old.

Samantha [00:34:05]:
Hey, I'm. I'm mediocrely old.

Lisa [00:34:10]:
Old.

Samantha [00:34:11]:
Shut the old. Really?

Lisa [00:34:14]:
Yeah.

Samantha [00:34:16]:
Chicken ankle. I just feel like, to the young people of the world, stop taking everything so seriously.

Lisa [00:34:28]:
Yes, it's okay to fail.

Samantha [00:34:29]:
Give yourself, like, acid reflux way too early. And an ulcer.

Lisa [00:34:33]:
And an ulcer.

Samantha [00:34:34]:
Just chill.

Lisa [00:34:35]:
Just chill. Just totally chill.

Samantha [00:34:37]:
Yeah, Chill, chill, chill.

Lisa [00:34:39]:
Because guess what? Shit happens. Move on all the time. You know what I want to do as I get older, Samantha? This is what I want to do. I want to stop wearing clothing that confines me. I feel bound. I feel bound in clothing. I want to stop.

Samantha [00:34:56]:
Are you trying to be. Are you being a hippie? Like, are you going to the hippie clothes?

Lisa [00:35:00]:
No, that Would be.

Samantha [00:35:01]:
Are you in your flowy stage?

Lisa [00:35:03]:
Remember that was supposed to be you last year.

Samantha [00:35:06]:
No, I think I'm going there.

Lisa [00:35:07]:
You're going. You said that last year. And you.

Samantha [00:35:09]:
I get my wide leg pants on. I get my wide leg pants on.

Lisa [00:35:12]:
I don't think you're going to go there. I don't think you're going to do it. You talked about it last year and you chickened out.

Samantha [00:35:16]:
Part of me. No, part of me is like half, you know, cool rocker T shirt and a pair of jean shorts or a pair of capris.

Lisa [00:35:24]:
Yeah.

Samantha [00:35:24]:
And then one minute I could be wearing like a flowy pant and a flowy tank top and I'd be happy.

Lisa [00:35:29]:
And out comes Mrs. Roper. Just like that. Right?

Samantha [00:35:33]:
No, I'm cool and I like it. That's good enough for me.

Lisa [00:35:36]:
I just feel like, like I think I need to go into. I think I need to go into, like pants with no buttons. A pull up. I think I need a pull up pant. I'm done buttoning. I think I'm done buttoning. That whole. Right.

Lisa [00:35:55]:
The whole action of buttoning.

Samantha [00:35:56]:
You're done buttoning.

Lisa [00:35:58]:
I feel I'm done buttoning.

Samantha [00:36:00]:
Okay.

Lisa [00:36:00]:
So over the button.

Samantha [00:36:02]:
That's fine. You can be over buttoning. I'll support that.

Lisa [00:36:06]:
Thank you.

Samantha [00:36:06]:
That's what you need to get into your, your, you know, later years.

Lisa [00:36:11]:
My later years. I think I'm gonna ditch the button. The pant button is gone.

Samantha [00:36:16]:
I just asked that they not be like full on polyester.

Lisa [00:36:19]:
No, I don't feel that. But you know what? Who says I can't get a pull up jean?

Samantha [00:36:23]:
Well, I pull up jean. You can get a pull up cotton pants.

Lisa [00:36:27]:
Yeah.

Samantha [00:36:27]:
Let's find you some pull up shorts, Lisa.

Lisa [00:36:29]:
I would wear pull up shorts.

Samantha [00:36:31]:
Just be careful what you put in your pockets because you don't need your shorts sliding down your skin.

Lisa [00:36:35]:
But the thing is, is that whatever I pull up, right. I don't want it to have too much stretch.

Samantha [00:36:43]:
Okay. And now you've become difficult. Now I'm being and I'm like, well. And then I decide, oh, my God, she's gonna roll that band. Okay.

Lisa [00:36:54]:
So that roll the band down.

Samantha [00:36:55]:
Worse.

Lisa [00:36:55]:
I'm gonna roll the band.

Samantha [00:36:56]:
You'll roll it down Because I'm short.

Lisa [00:36:58]:
I'm short in the rise.

Samantha [00:37:00]:
Well, you have a little bit of a thicker midsection, so I'm not really sure where your waist is actually.

Lisa [00:37:06]:
It's quite low, actually.

Samantha [00:37:07]:
Yes, it's quite low.

Lisa [00:37:10]:
Like, like my hips are really quite Low on my body. There's a lot of. There's a lot of space between my bosom and my midsection. Eh.

Samantha [00:37:24]:
Oh my God.

Lisa [00:37:25]:
That nether region is quite long.

Samantha [00:37:27]:
Oh, yes, I'm sure it is. Which is why you wear your carpenter pants so well.

Lisa [00:37:33]:
Right? Totally. And they're cargo pants. Thank you. But that's exactly. That's exactly it.

Samantha [00:37:42]:
Okay, well, I just feel like, you know, if we're gonna go flowy, let's just go hardcore 70s wild.

Lisa [00:37:48]:
No, I'm not doing this.

Samantha [00:37:49]:
Let's do it all. Like, let's get a crazy. I'm not gonna be smoking dope on the corner.

Lisa [00:37:55]:
Right. Like, you won't even take me to the pot shop.

Samantha [00:37:58]:
No, because I think you'll become addicted. And then I have. I just have something else I have to be concerned about.

Lisa [00:38:04]:
Pencil me in for pot. Right? Be so excited.

Samantha [00:38:07]:
Actually, no. What I would be worried about is because you would think nothing's happening and then you would take two more.

Lisa [00:38:14]:
I would.

Samantha [00:38:15]:
Technically speaking, you're not good with gravel, nor are you good with nighttime Benadryl.

Lisa [00:38:20]:
No. Because that's what I think. Right. I take.

Samantha [00:38:22]:
You take too much.

Lisa [00:38:23]:
I take too much. Or because I start and I'm like, I feel nothing. I feel it has not worked. And then I overtake and then. Oh, God. Now I'm wired and I'm wide awake. Right.

Samantha [00:38:32]:
Which is the opposite of what it should be doing.

Lisa [00:38:35]:
Yeah, totally. Right. So that would just be weird. But I don't want to be 70s wild child. It's too busy. It's not my. It's not my gig.

Samantha [00:38:42]:
No. Let's just get you some like V neck shirts that are a little looser and find you that pull up cotton pants with a roll down waistband. Yeah, that's got to be out there somewhere.

Lisa [00:38:54]:
It has to be, right? That's what next time we go shopping, that's what we're going to look for. Summer clothes. How about that?

Samantha [00:39:04]:
Take that, smart ass.

Lisa [00:39:06]:
Take that, smart ass. Right?

Samantha [00:39:08]:
Oh, I am not prepared for that.

Lisa [00:39:10]:
Start preparing. No, it's your morning.

Samantha [00:39:14]:
Nope.

Lisa [00:39:14]:
Yep.

Samantha [00:39:15]:
No.

Lisa [00:39:15]:
Hi. We already looked at glasses and that wasn't that bad.

Samantha [00:39:18]:
No.

Lisa [00:39:19]:
Here's the thing though, right when we did that, we did that spur of the moment because we were in the mall. We went into a place where we probably wouldn't have thought to buy glasses. But let's just test it out. Let's just go looking. I was a walk in the park. You ever. As in all things, when we're together and. And and there's anything involved, it totally becomes.

Lisa [00:39:37]:
What about these?

Samantha [00:39:38]:
Those?

Lisa [00:39:38]:
You would wear those, not me. You know, you are right. How do these look on me?

Samantha [00:39:45]:
Well, then I just started trying on glasses because they all look good on me.

Lisa [00:39:49]:
Well, you have a. You have a better glasses face than I do.

Samantha [00:39:52]:
I have a. I think I have a oblong.

Lisa [00:39:55]:
What do I. I just have a round, oval face.

Samantha [00:39:58]:
You have a square face.

Lisa [00:40:00]:
Is it square?

Samantha [00:40:01]:
Is it square?

Lisa [00:40:02]:
It's time for new glasses. Right? The whole bit. Just saying. It's time for glasses, too. Summer clothes and glasses. Oh, that's what we're doing here. Yep. Get prepared.

Samantha [00:40:15]:
No, I don't feel like it.

Lisa [00:40:17]:
I hope people are okay with us just arguing today. I feel like this is an argument that's long overdue. Right.

Samantha [00:40:24]:
Clap on, clap off.

Lisa [00:40:26]:
Clapping on and off that friendship right now.

Samantha [00:40:30]:
Okay, but seriously, we did tackle housework this weekend. I don't know what possessed me.

Lisa [00:40:35]:
I. I did too.

Samantha [00:40:37]:
But I hate all aspects of it.

Lisa [00:40:38]:
Right? Yeah.

Samantha [00:40:40]:
I hate bathrooms. I hate Swiffering. It seems pointless because it just comes back.

Lisa [00:40:45]:
You know what the problem is with cleaning is I get. I feel anger towards it because, yes, I want to live in a clean place, but when it comes to, like, the bathroom and dust and stuff like that, I think I didn't contribute to this dust. This dust just came out of nowhere and landed on my clean stuff. How about the dust learns to clean itself?

Samantha [00:41:08]:
Well, if only that were like.

Lisa [00:41:11]:
Right. Like bathroom counters. Right. Like bathroom counters. They get that. They get film on it because from hairspray and stuff like that. Right.

Samantha [00:41:21]:
What are you doing? Are you spraying the world?

Lisa [00:41:23]:
I spray my hair. Put this hairdo all in place and it. Right. I use. I use a high powered spray, thank you very much.

Samantha [00:41:34]:
No doubt. Just shell me.

Lisa [00:41:38]:
I don't want it. I don't need it moving or anything. Right.

Samantha [00:41:42]:
Your hair is so short. Where is it moving?

Lisa [00:41:45]:
It will move. It will move.

Samantha [00:41:47]:
It will not move.

Lisa [00:41:48]:
It will move. It will move. You. You're picking. You're picking.

Samantha [00:41:54]:
I'm not.

Lisa [00:41:55]:
You're picking.

Samantha [00:41:56]:
I am not. This is what I would say to you if I sat across from you and we. And you were making me eat breakfast with you.

Lisa [00:42:04]:
Right? This is. This is our life, friends of the podcast. This is the friendship right here. Totally. Right. We just.

Samantha [00:42:11]:
I hardly agree with you on anything.

Lisa [00:42:13]:
So I don't need you to agree with me. I already know that I'm right.

Samantha [00:42:16]:
Yeah.

Lisa [00:42:17]:
I already know that I'm right. Mostly right. Mostly right. Yeah.

Samantha [00:42:21]:
No, mostly wrong. But that's okay.

Lisa [00:42:23]:
I feel not. I feel that's not true.

Samantha [00:42:25]:
Okay, well, I need to ask you a question.

Lisa [00:42:28]:
Okay.

Samantha [00:42:29]:
If you're allowed to add four things to a Gen X time capsule, what are you adding?

Lisa [00:42:34]:
Okay, so it has to be Gen X related, right?

Samantha [00:42:37]:
Well, it has to be from our. Like our, Our.

Lisa [00:42:40]:
Our. Our childhood. Okay. What am I, what am I doing? I'm doing a Swatch. I'm doing a Ralph Lauren shirt. Uh huh. I'm doing. I'm probably gonna throw in Howard Jones album.

Samantha [00:43:02]:
Oh, good one.

Lisa [00:43:03]:
Right. And what would I do with my last one? You know what, I'm. Just for fun, I'm gonna throw in some Bonnie Bell Lip Smacker. Right. Probably the Dr. Pepper.

Samantha [00:43:13]:
Oh, that would be good.

Lisa [00:43:15]:
Yeah. What about you? What are you adding?

Samantha [00:43:17]:
I'm gonna add a cassette tape for sure.

Lisa [00:43:20]:
Is it one that you've made yourself?

Samantha [00:43:22]:
No.

Lisa [00:43:23]:
Oh, yeah.

Samantha [00:43:23]:
Let's add a mixtape.

Lisa [00:43:24]:
Right? Add a mixtape.

Samantha [00:43:25]:
Let's add a mixtape. I'm gonna add a mixtape. I'm gonna add a really big bottle of like hair Aquanet.

Lisa [00:43:33]:
Sure.

Samantha [00:43:34]:
Yeah. There you go. Probably one of my very large glass frames that I used to wear when I was a teenager. They were gigantic.

Lisa [00:43:44]:
I bet those were bad.

Samantha [00:43:46]:
But they're back in.

Lisa [00:43:47]:
Oh. Which scares me.

Samantha [00:43:48]:
People love that shit. And then I would probably then put in. And it's always the most vivid memory of my sister and I because it's, it's. There was a picture. I'm going to put in the 1970s multi striped hoodie sweater that my mother made both of us wear.

Lisa [00:44:08]:
Sure.

Samantha [00:44:09]:
And then took a picture.

Lisa [00:44:10]:
Totally.

Samantha [00:44:10]:
I'm gonna put that in the time capsule.

Lisa [00:44:12]:
Yeah. Right. And you know what? I'm gonna put in for honorable mention? A little bit of my younger youth. Let's throw in a romper.

Samantha [00:44:18]:
Oh, that's thrown around.

Lisa [00:44:20]:
We all had rompers.

Samantha [00:44:21]:
Yes, we did.

Lisa [00:44:22]:
Everything had no straps from here up. No straps. But yet had a little belt, like a little tie string. And it was. It was your top and your shorts all together. Who invented that thing?

Samantha [00:44:34]:
I'm not sure, but it's. It was wrong.

Lisa [00:44:36]:
It was really wrong.

Samantha [00:44:37]:
It was really wrong for young children.

Lisa [00:44:40]:
Yeah. Even. Because of course it would be before young girls like develop boobies.

Samantha [00:44:44]:
Yeah.

Lisa [00:44:44]:
But it was still seemed wrong.

Samantha [00:44:46]:
It's wrong.

Lisa [00:44:47]:
It still seemed wrong. Right. Maybe a pair of those heart. Remember those hard clogs too, that were like wooden.

Samantha [00:44:52]:
Yes, wooden clogs.

Lisa [00:44:54]:
Maybe throw in some of those.

Samantha [00:44:56]:
Let's do plastic bracelets.

Lisa [00:44:57]:
Yeah.

Samantha [00:44:58]:
That we swear.

Lisa [00:44:59]:
You better Throw in something neon, too.

Samantha [00:45:01]:
Yo. God. Yes.

Lisa [00:45:03]:
Right?

Samantha [00:45:03]:
Oh, my God. Leg warmers.

Lisa [00:45:05]:
Oh, I never was a leg warmer fan.

Samantha [00:45:07]:
Right. Oh, I had them leg warmers. And I had white frilly boots.

Lisa [00:45:14]:
Were they tassel boots? They were white tassel boots. I'm gonna wear my tassels.

Samantha [00:45:21]:
The Pink Pony Club.

Lisa [00:45:24]:
Sam's gonna wear white tassels. At the Pink Pony Club, Sam's gonna wear white tassels.

Samantha [00:45:30]:
Are you kidding? That was like the epitome of, like, cool boots back then.

Lisa [00:45:34]:
I remember those little. What were those? Remember the little Peter Pan getaway boots?

Samantha [00:45:38]:
Yes.

Lisa [00:45:39]:
Right?

Samantha [00:45:39]:
Oh, yeah.

Lisa [00:45:40]:
You know what I loved, and I would probably still love it today? I loved a good desert boot.

Samantha [00:45:45]:
Those were good boots.

Lisa [00:45:46]:
Right? That was a good boot.

Samantha [00:45:47]:
I think they came back.

Lisa [00:45:48]:
They did, but they never seem to catch on again.

Samantha [00:45:51]:
Oh, boat shoes.

Lisa [00:45:53]:
Oh, totally. Right.

Samantha [00:45:55]:
Boat shoes.

Lisa [00:45:55]:
Love boat shoes. So much.

Samantha [00:45:57]:
Boat shoes. Maybe some ocean Pacific.

Lisa [00:45:59]:
Yeah. There's so much. Right.

Samantha [00:46:01]:
Op. You gotta throw that in.

Lisa [00:46:03]:
Gotta throw that. Classic. Totally. Right. It was the best. That's what we're taking. That's. That's what our capsule's looking like, Samantha.

Lisa [00:46:11]:
Right?

Samantha [00:46:11]:
The best ever.

Lisa [00:46:13]:
Got the best ever. We got the coolest, the hippest, the raddest time capsule. Right. And maybe. Maybe a vid. Maybe a vhs. A Valley Girl movie.

Samantha [00:46:23]:
Yes, right. Oh, my God. That would be awesome.

Lisa [00:46:28]:
Right? There's our time capsule. Seal that sucker up, people. Right. Okay, this is something that was a little unnerving. Okay. And I don't know, let's just try to be honest about it. Okay. Shall we?

Samantha [00:46:42]:
Let's.

Lisa [00:46:42]:
Let's try and be honest. Apparently, 85% of North Americans aren't washing their bath towels frequently enough. Apparently you're supposed to wash them either every other day or after two uses. Oh, right.

Samantha [00:46:59]:
Okay.

Lisa [00:47:00]:
Are we judging? Are we being judged? I think we're being totally being judged. I'm like, we're being judged. Wow. Really? Huh.

Samantha [00:47:10]:
And why are you in my bathroom? And why do you give a shit?

Lisa [00:47:13]:
Right? Because when I have a shower, I'm coming out clean. Right. So cleanness is going on my towel. Clean. Cleanness is on my towel, actually. Not dirtiness. I'm not rubbing myself in it after I've been sweating. I'm coming out like.

Lisa [00:47:29]:
Like. Like a. Like a daisy. Right?

Samantha [00:47:32]:
Like a rose.

Lisa [00:47:32]:
Like a rose. So I don't know. I'm just like, oh, my God. I like to think that I'm pretty clean and pretty on top of things like laundry.

Samantha [00:47:41]:
Yes. But I. You know what? Judge Away. I don't care. What are you. Are you in my house? No. Are you in my bathroom? No. Are you using my towel? No.

Samantha [00:47:50]:
What the fuck do you care?

Lisa [00:47:51]:
But here's. But I do have a man share. I have. I have a weird thing, right? And friends of the podcast, if you're married or you live with your other. Your significant other, tell me this, do you share the same towel? I do not.

Samantha [00:48:05]:
Oh, right. Why would you do that?

Lisa [00:48:07]:
I think people do because you go into people's bathrooms, they just got two towels hanging. They probably just grab a towel. No, no, no. Right. Because I'm not.

Samantha [00:48:15]:
Sorry. And there I go judging.

Lisa [00:48:17]:
Because I'm not. I'm not rubbing off what's been rubbed off by somebody else. It just, it's like. It's like sharing soap on a rope. It's the same type of thing. Right? And dad cleaned himself and mom cleaned herself and everybody used the same face cloth.

Samantha [00:48:33]:
Everybody used the same bath water.

Lisa [00:48:39]:
So. So disgusting. Right, Right. I remember using Dad's soap. Route 33, soup, soap, rope. Nobody cared. Right?

Samantha [00:48:55]:
Okay.

Lisa [00:48:56]:
That's so nasty.

Samantha [00:48:58]:
I'm so thankful for indoor plumbing.

Lisa [00:49:00]:
Right, Right. Because they just. Right. Bad. Bad enough that as kids we had to, as siblings, be in the bath together.

Samantha [00:49:08]:
Oh, yeah. That was fun. Yeah, that was. Yeah. I'm glad I know that. And then we. And then we got our own towel.

Lisa [00:49:16]:
Right? And we got our own towel and we blocked it out, actually, because I know we did it, but I have no memory of it.

Samantha [00:49:21]:
Yeah, I don't recall, but I'm sure it happened.

Lisa [00:49:24]:
But I don't recall. Right. Yeah, yeah. So I'm just saying. Right. So. So friends of the podcast, just ask yourself about your towels. Yeah.

Lisa [00:49:34]:
Are they clean? According to 85% of the people in North America, they're probably not.

Samantha [00:49:40]:
This could come up as a Sunday faithful.

Lisa [00:49:42]:
It could, right? It could. It might have to.

Samantha [00:49:45]:
I feel like it's got that ability.

Lisa [00:49:48]:
It'S got that vibe. Hey, it's got a Sunday question Vibe.

Samantha [00:49:51]:
Insider riot.

Lisa [00:49:52]:
Right? Let's see. How often do you wash your bath towels?

Samantha [00:49:58]:
Do you share it with others?

Lisa [00:50:00]:
Do you share it with others?

Samantha [00:50:01]:
Do you share bath water together?

Lisa [00:50:03]:
I hope we've. I hope we have put that in the past. Oh, good. Okay. Yeah.

Samantha [00:50:09]:
Okay. I gotta tell you, I gotta tell you about this really cool new tick tock trend.

Lisa [00:50:13]:
Oh, my God. The fact that just came out of your mouth is so weird.

Samantha [00:50:16]:
I know the. It's. It's the daily shimmy and it's to help your, like Mental health and to shake it off. And it was started by Rose. No, Niche creator. That's her creator name on Tick Tock. And she started it. And she's just like, shimmy.

Lisa [00:50:32]:
And she's doing a shimmy.

Samantha [00:50:34]:
She's doing a shimmy.

Lisa [00:50:35]:
Just doing a shimmy.

Samantha [00:50:36]:
This cool music. She's a shimian. And I'm like, maybe this is something that Lisa and I can do. We. We did that other weird TikTok trend.

Lisa [00:50:43]:
I feel like not a good shimmy.

Samantha [00:50:44]:
Chicken Banana.

Lisa [00:50:45]:
Are you kidding? All I heard from that was how uncoordinated I was. And now look at me as. Look at me as I try and shimmy. I feel like I'm boxing.

Samantha [00:50:53]:
Nope, that's. It's more of a loose.

Lisa [00:50:57]:
I don't think. I think my shoulders aren't loose.

Samantha [00:50:59]:
And then you. You shimmy your ass.

Lisa [00:51:01]:
Huh? I can probably shimmy that.

Samantha [00:51:03]:
Yeah. I don't think you're gonna be able to do this so well, but we'll practice, and if I feel like you're not going to make a total ass of yourself, we'll record it.

Lisa [00:51:12]:
Well, I totally made NASA myself with Chicken Banana. When I look at that video, Friends of the podcast, if you haven't seen it, it's out there. It's on our Tick Tock. It's on our Facebook. It's on our Instagram. When I look at the video, you're in the background. Like, you're just at the club, just dancing. Right.

Lisa [00:51:27]:
Chicken. And I'm like, all over it. Right. What'd my kid sister say? Oh, my God. You have no. You have no coordination. I do not.

Samantha [00:51:37]:
Your sister outed you. It was good. Yeah, it was good, right?

Lisa [00:51:41]:
Totally. Then we could do when the sun go Down.

Samantha [00:51:44]:
No, no. That is so over. We're not doing.

Lisa [00:51:47]:
Let's bring it back Doing new.

Samantha [00:51:48]:
Let's bring the daily shimmy if we're doing anything.

Lisa [00:51:50]:
Fine. We'll. We'll shimmy on Friday. All right. We shall shimmy.

Samantha [00:51:55]:
We shall shimmy.

Lisa [00:51:56]:
We shall shimmy. You will see us shimmy, right?

Samantha [00:52:00]:
Maybe not.

Lisa [00:52:00]:
I'll check it out. We'll see. We're gonna think about shimmying.

Samantha [00:52:04]:
We'll think about it.

Lisa [00:52:05]:
Because we support good mental health.

Samantha [00:52:07]:
We do. And it's a cool trend. And it's very. It's. Everyone's jumping on it.

Lisa [00:52:11]:
So let's jump. Let's jump. Right? You're still shimmying. I am.

Samantha [00:52:16]:
Because it's.

Lisa [00:52:17]:
There's a new. I'm shaking my head also at a new Trend Sometimes I watch on the TikTok, like people who are getting their hair cut, right? Because I'm like, I think that's kind of cool. See how it plays out? There's a new thing that the barbers are doing with men. Men are getting their eyelashes trimmed.

Samantha [00:52:38]:
Oh, God. Why?

Lisa [00:52:39]:
So they look more manly.

Samantha [00:52:41]:
Oh, my God.

Lisa [00:52:42]:
Here's the thing, dear. Men. Men with nice eyelashes. You look good.

Samantha [00:52:48]:
Yeah, Women love that.

Lisa [00:52:50]:
Women love a man with nice lashes, Right? Means you've got beautiful eyes. They show with the clippers.

Samantha [00:52:58]:
Oh my God. With clippers.

Lisa [00:53:00]:
With clippers. Like with, like, with a little like, like with the plugin.

Samantha [00:53:04]:
No.

Lisa [00:53:05]:
And they're cutting off their eyelashes so they look more manly.

Samantha [00:53:08]:
No, that's a bad idea.

Lisa [00:53:10]:
You like. Hi, you imagine Snuffleupagus with no eyelashes.

Samantha [00:53:15]:
Oh my God. That little.

Lisa [00:53:16]:
Right, right. He's got beautiful eyelashes.

Samantha [00:53:19]:
Oh, my God.

Lisa [00:53:20]:
Yeah, right?

Samantha [00:53:21]:
Who told them they don't look manly with their eyelashes?

Lisa [00:53:24]:
Right? Because you know what? For men, A good eyebrow and a good set of lashes. It's okay. That's good.

Samantha [00:53:31]:
It's good.

Lisa [00:53:32]:
It's good.

Samantha [00:53:32]:
Got a strong face.

Lisa [00:53:33]:
Yeah, right? You got a good face. Right?

Samantha [00:53:36]:
Leave it alone.

Lisa [00:53:37]:
Why are you taking off your eye all.

Samantha [00:53:38]:
I started that. Shame on you all. I want you for shaming men into thinking they have to shave their eyelashes off.

Lisa [00:53:45]:
Their eyelashes.

Samantha [00:53:46]:
You know what it takes to be a man? Not being an.

Lisa [00:53:50]:
Not being an.

Samantha [00:53:51]:
That's all it takes.

Lisa [00:53:51]:
That's all it takes.

Samantha [00:53:52]:
That's all it takes.

Lisa [00:53:52]:
Look at that.

Samantha [00:53:54]:
Treating people decently and being nice and kind and not being an.

Lisa [00:54:00]:
Don't be an asshole.

Samantha [00:54:00]:
That's what it takes to be a man. It's all.

Lisa [00:54:02]:
That's all.

Samantha [00:54:03]:
Don't shave your face. I mean, shave faces.

Lisa [00:54:05]:
If you don't shave your eye, don't.

Samantha [00:54:06]:
Shave your eyebrows or don't.

Lisa [00:54:08]:
Your eyelashes.

Samantha [00:54:08]:
Eyebrows. Don't shave your lashes.

Lisa [00:54:10]:
Like, don't do that. That's so crazy. All I want are beautiful lashes. I spend lots of money on eyelash stuff. Right? Remember lashes? Oh, lots of lash. And these dudes are shaving off their. Lots of lash.

Samantha [00:54:25]:
Yeah. And maybe they donate their. Donate their eyelashes to you.

Lisa [00:54:29]:
I don't know. I might have to look at getting fake eyelashes or something.

Samantha [00:54:33]:
Oh, and then you can be like, bam.

Lisa [00:54:35]:
But I don't want. But I don't want them to be that obvious. Right. I would only just want the non obvious ones.

Samantha [00:54:40]:
I feel like you need to go to an expert for that.

Lisa [00:54:42]:
I feel like I'm not gonna ever do that.

Samantha [00:54:44]:
Yeah. Probably not.

Lisa [00:54:45]:
It's not going to, so. But dear men, stop shaving your eyebrow, your eyelashes.

Samantha [00:54:49]:
Stop that.

Lisa [00:54:50]:
That's creepy.

Samantha [00:54:51]:
That is so wrong. It's not necessary.

Lisa [00:54:54]:
No. And God gave you eyelashes for a reason. Yes. Right.

Samantha [00:54:59]:
Keep out of your eyeballs.

Lisa [00:55:00]:
Yeah, right.

Samantha [00:55:01]:
There's a purpose to eyelash.

Lisa [00:55:02]:
Imagine those growing back. How itchy that would be. The world knows anything shaved off becomes really itchy at some point. Gets really, really itchy.

Samantha [00:55:14]:
Anything women, because we shave a lot of area. We would know.

Lisa [00:55:18]:
We know it gets it right. Get all these red eyed men because they're itching.

Samantha [00:55:24]:
Yeah. You know, I'm just saying it's weird.

Lisa [00:55:27]:
It's weird.

Samantha [00:55:29]:
Okay, let's move on.

Lisa [00:55:31]:
Let's move on.

Samantha [00:55:32]:
Pickling.

Lisa [00:55:33]:
I love pickling. I love pickles.

Samantha [00:55:35]:
Okay, so apparently dill pickling everything is a trend.

Lisa [00:55:38]:
Nice.

Samantha [00:55:39]:
Okay, would you try pickles dipped in chocolate or pickle flavored ketchup?

Lisa [00:55:46]:
I would do both. I would eat anything dipped in chocolate.

Samantha [00:55:50]:
No.

Lisa [00:55:50]:
What did my mom always say? If you deep fried it and put. If you deep fried a piece of shit for my kids and put it with dip, they'd probably eat it. I'd like to think we wouldn't, but. But she was pretty convinced that we might because we loved anything deep fried with dip.

Samantha [00:56:06]:
I'm sorry, I can't. I even hate deep fried pickles.

Lisa [00:56:11]:
You. Yeah, you do. And I don't know why.

Samantha [00:56:13]:
I do. I do. I. I can't because I believe my pickles need to be cold.

Lisa [00:56:20]:
And you got like weird tomato rules too.

Samantha [00:56:23]:
I have weird tomato rules.

Lisa [00:56:24]:
You got weird rules. It's not just me that's weird. You got weird things too.

Samantha [00:56:29]:
We tried. I've tried pickle, deep fried pickle spears and deep fried little pickle things like the pickle chips. Yeah, I don't mind them.

Lisa [00:56:37]:
I don't love. I mean, they're not my favorite, but. But I like pickles. Like on Saturday I just had a little plate of dum dum pickles and just ate them.

Samantha [00:56:46]:
Yum yum. Not dumb, dumb pickles.

Lisa [00:56:52]:
And I just ate them. That was my lunch. Just having some pickles.

Samantha [00:56:55]:
Oh. Oh, right. Well, if you're. If you're nice to me by the end, I might tell you what my mother may or may not potentially give.

Lisa [00:57:02]:
You because I gave her back her jars.

Samantha [00:57:04]:
Yeah, she was very impressed.

Lisa [00:57:06]:
Right. I have to tell you, it was all Mike, not me. I know, totally. Right? He cleaned them. We're talking about beets. Friends of the podcast. Yeah. Sam's mom makes delicious beets.

Lisa [00:57:16]:
He cleaned them. He soaked them for two days. There wouldn't be. Because he's like, they can't go. You can't give them back smelling like beets. I think that they're supposed to smell like beets. They housed beets. So anyway, so I have to give him full credit for that.

Lisa [00:57:30]:
Right.

Samantha [00:57:31]:
But she. I think she may or may not have a full jar left of beets.

Lisa [00:57:35]:
Nice. Because I ate two jars since Christmas.

Samantha [00:57:38]:
I know, right?

Lisa [00:57:40]:
Right. So I would pickle. I would eat things. I would totally do flavored ketchup. Pickled flavored ketchup.

Samantha [00:57:46]:
Pickled flavored ketchup. Sure.

Lisa [00:57:47]:
That wouldn't bother me.

Samantha [00:57:49]:
No. Ugh.

Lisa [00:57:50]:
Right? Like if it's a chocolate gherkin, I could do a gherkin chocolate. I don't want to dill pickle in chocolate, but I could do a gherkin.

Samantha [00:57:58]:
Maybe a gherkin.

Lisa [00:57:59]:
Right? You could, you could do that. It's like, it's like, maybe it's like bugs, right? I don't think I could eat a bug, but I could probably do an ant with chocolate on it. I could probably do an ant. Could you do an ant maybe? Yeah, you could do it. And like, I don't want to do a fly. It seems too big. Seems like there's something I gotta chew. I don't want to fly ant.

Lisa [00:58:18]:
I could just swallow it. Right? I could do that. I could do that. You know, but dill pickles are popular. People love pickles.

Samantha [00:58:25]:
I know. And that's great. And I love pickles too. But I feel like pickles are very separate from all other things.

Lisa [00:58:30]:
I know.

Samantha [00:58:30]:
I don't think they should be deep fried. I don't think they should be dipped in anything.

Lisa [00:58:34]:
You hold them very sacred. Okay.

Samantha [00:58:35]:
I apparently do.

Lisa [00:58:37]:
So I don't know if this commercial comes up in America. I feel it's an American commercial, but I could be wrong. But it comes up all the time in Canada. 1-877-cars-for kids. Do you know that commercial?

Samantha [00:58:51]:
No.

Lisa [00:58:52]:
It's a bunch of kids playing guitars in like, like little dressy shorts and, and they're a band. And it's like, donate your car today. You don't know that commercial?

Samantha [00:59:03]:
No.

Lisa [00:59:04]:
Friends of the podcast, do you know that 1-877-cars-for kids donate your car today. And it's like to donate your car and then you get like a tax receipt.

Samantha [00:59:14]:
Uh huh.

Lisa [00:59:15]:
I see it.

Samantha [00:59:15]:
We see it all the time on your television.

Lisa [00:59:18]:
On our television all the time.

Samantha [00:59:21]:
And I said, where Am I?

Lisa [00:59:22]:
I don't know. And I said to Mike, I want to know how old these kids are now. Cause I bet you they're 30. You've never heard the song. Google it. Google it. You could probably see a video of it. 1.

Lisa [00:59:33]:
It's a little blonde haired kid playing a big guitar. 1, 8, 77 cars for kids. Donate your car today. Somebody's on the drums. The whole bit. I just want to see. How are you? How old are these kids?

Samantha [00:59:45]:
What are you watching? That old commercial.

Lisa [00:59:48]:
Probably cable. Because I like cable. I have not abandoned TV like you, so it's probably.

Samantha [00:59:55]:
I have not abandoned.

Lisa [00:59:56]:
You've abandoned cable tv?

Samantha [00:59:58]:
No, I have not.

Lisa [00:59:59]:
For the most part.

Samantha [01:00:00]:
There's occasionally a show or two that I like to watch.

Lisa [01:00:03]:
Still watching Idol.

Samantha [01:00:05]:
I am a fair weather friend.

Lisa [01:00:07]:
Have you. Did you hear the big news?

Samantha [01:00:09]:
No.

Lisa [01:00:10]:
The Backstreet Boy's gone. Oh, sorry.

Samantha [01:00:13]:
Spoiler.

Lisa [01:00:13]:
I know, right? Because he's horrible.

Samantha [01:00:17]:
He didn't deserve to be there.

Lisa [01:00:18]:
Oh, just because your daddy's in a band don't mean you're in a band. He can't sing.

Samantha [01:00:22]:
We're shit.

Lisa [01:00:23]:
Okay. So I thought for sure you would have known. The commercial.

Samantha [01:00:26]:
No, sorry, I can't. I cannot. I cannot say that I have ever seen that.

Lisa [01:00:31]:
I don't think it shows up on the Netflix shows. Right? I don't think. I think. I think it's totally a cable. A cable driven commercial.

Samantha [01:00:39]:
Yeah.

Lisa [01:00:40]:
Right.

Samantha [01:00:41]:
Oh my God.

Lisa [01:00:42]:
Yeah.

Samantha [01:00:43]:
Okay. I haven't. I shake my head and it's a little surprising for me.

Lisa [01:00:49]:
Okay.

Samantha [01:00:51]:
I need to shake my head at the most recent headlining news out of the US in the last couple of days. They apparently are going to pay women to have babies who are going into college. They're going to give you a 30% grant or something. I don't know. And then. Yeah, and then they're going to pay women. When the woman has had her baby, they're going to pay her $5,000 for having that baby. Congratulations.

Samantha [01:01:18]:
You've now gotten $5,000. And with all the medical bills, you will just be giving it back to the hospital.

Lisa [01:01:23]:
Right. And now we're the Handmaid's Tale.

Samantha [01:01:27]:
And apparently in all of that, they're also going to educate women on their menstrual cycle. So they know when they ovulate, when it's a good time to procreate.

Lisa [01:01:40]:
The men are going to teach women.

Samantha [01:01:42]:
Yes, apparently we're going to educate women because we couldn't possibly know.

Lisa [01:01:47]:
Right? Right. When we're going to menstruate yeah, we.

Samantha [01:01:51]:
Don'T know anything about that. So apparently they're going to teach women about their menstrual cycle so they know exactly when they're ovulating and they're ready to, to be impregnated.

Lisa [01:02:01]:
Nothing says, are you kidding me? Nothing. Nothing says let's teach you women about your sexuality than a Republican man. Right? Oh my God. And we wonder why the Pope died after meeting J.D. vance.

Samantha [01:02:17]:
We, and we wonder why.

Lisa [01:02:18]:
Right?

Samantha [01:02:19]:
I, I, I read that and I was like, there is no way that this is real. No, everybody's talking about it. Everybody's talking about the fact they're going to pay women, college aged women who are either married or going to college to, and they're going to pay them 30. They're giving them a grant of 30% or something like happening there. People, don't get me wrong, they're like.

Lisa [01:02:42]:
18, but don't get me wrong, married. When I'm in, when I was in college, had somebody offered me that like, like, like 30% of a big chunk of money, I might have thought about it.

Samantha [01:02:51]:
No, but the thing, okay, the problem is people, the problem is, is that you can, you can God forbid, have a group of people, a group of women or women of a certain age get sucked into this. But what happens when, I don't know, during the pregnancy, after the birth, the whole bit, while the child is getting raised. Where's the money coming from? What if this person doesn't want their baby anymore? It goes into the, into system. Into the system. It may or may not get a do. Like you're pulling all of the funds from women's health care in order for this to actually work, people. Because you would need to put money back into it, right?

Lisa [01:03:36]:
Because they're concerned because women aren't having babies and the population's not growing.

Samantha [01:03:40]:
Do you wonder why?

Lisa [01:03:42]:
Right, right. Oh, I shake my head. I shake my head.

Samantha [01:03:48]:
This is men telling women what to do with their bodies. But let's pay you for it because apparently we're incentivized by cash and it solves nothing. It solves nothing. And don't teach us about our own menstrual cycles.

Lisa [01:04:06]:
Right?

Samantha [01:04:06]:
Dumbass.

Lisa [01:04:07]:
How about stay away from our menstrual cycles.

Samantha [01:04:09]:
How about just stay out of women's health. How about clap on and clap off.

Lisa [01:04:13]:
Clap, clap on and clap off them. Right?

Samantha [01:04:16]:
Okay, but then there's more. Then I learned more today. There's another level to this. Wow, I have to share this because I was like, are you kidding me? Apparently RFK Jr. Right, the head of their health. Whatever they call me now, wants to use private medical information to start an autism registry where he's going to register. Registrar. Register all people who have autism.

Lisa [01:04:44]:
Yeah, he's got a real issue with autistic.

Samantha [01:04:46]:
Why would you do that? Why would you need. You don't collect the names and medical information of people who are autistic.

Lisa [01:04:53]:
You don't. Unless.

Samantha [01:04:54]:
Why?

Lisa [01:04:55]:
Unless. Unless you're Hitler. Right.

Samantha [01:04:59]:
Because no offense, he should not have access to people's private information.

Lisa [01:05:04]:
No, nobody should. It's private. Yes, totally. It's private.

Samantha [01:05:07]:
Just because he's the head of something doesn't mean he gets that information.

Lisa [01:05:11]:
No, no. That's horrible.

Samantha [01:05:13]:
Please, people, can you fight for that?

Lisa [01:05:14]:
Oh, come on.

Samantha [01:05:16]:
This is in the United States. I'm worried for us on. On. On a totally different level.

Lisa [01:05:20]:
Right. But like, I.

Samantha [01:05:24]:
Shake my head.

Lisa [01:05:24]:
Shake your head. That's a shake.

Samantha [01:05:26]:
Shake my head.

Lisa [01:05:27]:
That's very shakable.

Samantha [01:05:28]:
If we could clap on and clap off.

Lisa [01:05:30]:
Oh, Robert Kennedy Jr. Clap on. Right.

Samantha [01:05:33]:
Clap off.

Lisa [01:05:33]:
Just. There's so many to start clapping. We need.

Samantha [01:05:36]:
We need. I just needed to express my.

Lisa [01:05:39]:
That's.

Samantha [01:05:40]:
That's bizarre because I couldn't believe what I was reading.

Lisa [01:05:43]:
That's just bizarre. Like, that's just weird shit.

Samantha [01:05:47]:
I don't understand it.

Lisa [01:05:49]:
No, because you can't understand it because it makes no sense. There's nothing. There's anybody. Just gibberish.

Samantha [01:05:55]:
If anybody wants to see a really good take on this unlearned 16 Joe our.

Lisa [01:06:01]:
Oh, I haven't seen it.

Samantha [01:06:03]:
Yeah, she put out. She put out some stuff on socials today about it, so go check it out.

Lisa [01:06:07]:
Good. I'll definitely look at that after, too. Right. She just puts it into perspective.

Samantha [01:06:12]:
Oh, she does.

Lisa [01:06:13]:
She's. She's amazing.

Samantha [01:06:14]:
Yeah, she's amazing that way. But let's move on to things. Things around Sam's disgust around Cadbury Eggs. Oh, my God. This is the episode where I complain about everything.

Lisa [01:06:28]:
You are complaining, right? We need to clap on and clap off your pissy attitude.

Samantha [01:06:32]:
There we go. Okay, but. Okay. Because you are obsessed. You love Cadbury Eggs. Your sister. I don't understand it. I don't get it.

Samantha [01:06:40]:
I don't get it. I don't get it.

Lisa [01:06:41]:
I don't get.

Samantha [01:06:42]:
I didn't like it as a kid, and I'm pretty sure I like it.

Lisa [01:06:45]:
Even more as an adult, but apparently.

Samantha [01:06:47]:
When you posted that on Sunday, people were like, yes, yes, yes, I love them. Oh, my God. I'm like, ew. Ew.

Lisa [01:06:55]:
Right? Right.

Samantha [01:06:57]:
And I'm like, I don't understand. I don't get it. I don't. It is like. It is like the little baby. It's like a thin chocolate with like, weird yum looking things.

Lisa [01:07:10]:
Sweetness inside. Just sweetness. It's so, so good. Right? It's so good. It's so good.

Samantha [01:07:17]:
I honorable mention, though, to Jill and Carrie, because they replied with really hilarious ew memes, which I totally agree.

Lisa [01:07:25]:
Right?

Samantha [01:07:26]:
Totally agree. And then Cindy was like, they're. They are good, but only one or two. And I'm like, how can you even get through one?

Lisa [01:07:32]:
Oh, and easily. Easily. Ugh. So good. So good. Maybe you have to retry it.

Samantha [01:07:40]:
Uh, no.

Lisa [01:07:41]:
No, you're not going to.

Samantha [01:07:42]:
I don't need to put myself into instant diabetes. Like, I don't need that in my life.

Lisa [01:07:46]:
That's what. And that's totally where you're going, right? You're going into that. That's totally what. What'll happen. It's so sweet, but it's so good.

Samantha [01:07:53]:
Okay.

Lisa [01:07:54]:
So, so good. Okay. But you know what? This is what. It was interesting, right? So. So we do our Facebook Tuesdays, right? We do. Our one has to go this week. We did 80s bands, right? So we had a good selection. I felt.

Lisa [01:08:06]:
Right. Had a good selection. I don't think we heard from any of the guys except for John. I don't think we heard from Luke. Luke. Oh, I didn't see.

Samantha [01:08:14]:
No, he got mad because he's like, what are you doing?

Lisa [01:08:18]:
He didn't appreciate it.

Samantha [01:08:19]:
He's like, what? Like what? Nope. Because he didn't appreciate. He was like, how dare we make him choose? And he refused to choose.

Lisa [01:08:28]:
Okay. He loved them all, apparently. Nice. Nice. Okay, so we had, like. So we had. We had Motley Crue, we had Bon Jovi, we had the Arrhythmics, we had the Cure, we had Duran Duran, we had U2. Yeah, we had a couple others, too.

Lisa [01:08:43]:
I don't remember.

Samantha [01:08:44]:
Nope, we only have six. I think there was only six.

Lisa [01:08:47]:
I don't know. There might have been seven, but I don't remember who they were. Any. Oh. And anyways, Motley Crue got just pulverized. Pulverized. And I purposely put Motley Crue on for my dear friend Laura Bennett, right? Because she was my. She was my neighbor in university and she's from.

Lisa [01:09:06]:
She was from northern Manitoba and she rocked it. Devil horns. Loved her. Motley Crue. She actually went after you because you made a comment.

Samantha [01:09:15]:
She gave me shit.

Lisa [01:09:16]:
She gave you A shit. Don't diss her. Motley Crue. I'll tell you that. She had a poster, the whole bit, right? That girl loved her heavy metal. And so I. So I put that just purposely so I was very happy that she replied. But people also, they hated Motley Crue.

Lisa [01:09:31]:
They hated the Cure.

Samantha [01:09:33]:
And Bon Jovi was really up there too.

Lisa [01:09:35]:
Yeah, Bon Jovi, right?

Samantha [01:09:36]:
Nobody likes Bon Jovi. And I'm like, ah, that's fair.

Lisa [01:09:39]:
I don't think anybody kicked Duran Duran.

Samantha [01:09:42]:
No.

Lisa [01:09:43]:
I think it stayed put. And some people didn't like the Arithmetics, the arrhythmics.

Samantha [01:09:47]:
That hurt my heart. And people. Actually, there was a couple who.

Lisa [01:09:49]:
The other one was In Excess. And I'm like, oh, we had in excess in there.

Samantha [01:09:52]:
Oh, in excess. Nobody kicked in excess, actually. No, no, that's good.

Lisa [01:09:57]:
Which people should. Because, you know, we should be bitter that he. That he died and then In Excess was no more.

Samantha [01:10:02]:
I know, right?

Lisa [01:10:04]:
So anyways, it was lots of fun. So join us on that Facebook page. That's right. Help us with ideas.

Samantha [01:10:13]:
It's getting tough if you're watching this. Lisa gave a fake smile. So you know that she's like, just give me some.

Lisa [01:10:19]:
It's getting tough. Three years, every Tuesday.

Samantha [01:10:23]:
We're doing our best.

Lisa [01:10:24]:
We're doing our best, right? We're just. We're trying to keep in touch. We're just trying to keep in touch and make it fun, guys.

Samantha [01:10:30]:
We have full time jobs. We've got lives. We have. We go out, we do stuff and then we do this.

Lisa [01:10:35]:
And we gotta. Help us. Help us.

Samantha [01:10:37]:
And we do this.

Lisa [01:10:38]:
Throw us a little bone. Throw us a little bone.

Samantha [01:10:41]:
Small bone.

Lisa [01:10:41]:
Small.

Samantha [01:10:42]:
Not. Not big bone.

Lisa [01:10:43]:
Just a little bone.

Samantha [01:10:44]:
Okay, you know what I'm going to do? Just bear with me. It's like a minute of your life. 30 seconds. If I talk really fast. Connect with us on social media or visit us at our website, which is. I shake my headpod.com to sign up for newsletters, leave a message or check out our episodes, watch the podcast on YouTube and subscribe. Join our Patreon for exclusive content, early access and behind the scenes footage, all for as little as $2 a month. Visit patreon.com I shake my head.

Samantha [01:11:11]:
If you are looking for I shake my head. Swag. Go to threadless.com and search for us. We're proud to be part of the Women in Media Network and we want to thank John Jingo for editing our podcast each week. And he's about to get some work today.

Lisa [01:11:24]:
He's got some work. Sorry, John.

Samantha [01:11:25]:
He's got some work to do.

Lisa [01:11:27]:
Sorry. Okay. However, here's the part that people still are waiting for. The ESPN fantasy baseball update. We're in week four. Your girl tied for first four, 040. There's 22 weeks in this game, right? And it's intense because every day you have to make sure your team's good. So.

Lisa [01:11:53]:
So every day, all seven days, you're getting points, you're getting points, you're getting points. You got to be on it, you got to be on your game, right? Changing, trading, letting people go, dropping, claiming, the whole bit. And I'm after four weeks, tied for first, I think.

Samantha [01:12:09]:
I swear to God, guys, if you know how to get this Rain man esque person to make us all money, right?

Lisa [01:12:16]:
DM me, I said to the hhg, you need to take me to Vegas. We gotta figure this out. We gotta figure out how I do this, right?

Samantha [01:12:27]:
You don't even know how you do it.

Lisa [01:12:29]:
I don't know, but I'm really good at it. Because even hhd, she's like, you're really good at fantasy games. I'm like, apparently I'm really good at fantasy sports. There's gotta be a way to make money.

Samantha [01:12:38]:
There has to be.

Lisa [01:12:39]:
I'm willing to be pimped out, right? Use this. Use whatever's up here, whatever God gave me. I don't know why he gave me it, but apparently I can be in the game.

Samantha [01:12:52]:
There you go.

Lisa [01:12:53]:
Right? But let me just tell you, my blue Jays spiraling down. Time to call on the fake fan.

Samantha [01:12:58]:
Oh, I heard they lost three in a row.

Lisa [01:13:00]:
They actually just lost four because they lost tonight too.

Samantha [01:13:03]:
Oh, okay. Well, my dad informed me of that the other day and I'm like, oh, Lisa's not gonna be happy. No.

Lisa [01:13:08]:
Is Larry's watching? Is he.

Samantha [01:13:10]:
Larry's watching baseball.

Lisa [01:13:12]:
Good, Good for him. Good. Some good. Yeah, I'll watch by.

Samantha [01:13:14]:
I'll.

Lisa [01:13:15]:
I'll. I'll live with. Bear with Larry and watch baseball. Okay, that'll be kind of fun. So I'm just saying, right? They're sucking big time.

Samantha [01:13:22]:
I know.

Lisa [01:13:23]:
Yeah. Nobody's hitting. The bats aren't coming alive. Uh. Oh, Samantha, what else you want to talk about?

Samantha [01:13:29]:
That's. I'm good.

Lisa [01:13:30]:
You're good? I'm better. But that's all, that's all you want to do.

Samantha [01:13:34]:
Yep.

Lisa [01:13:35]:
All right, you know what? Friends of the podcast, have a great week. Enjoy the podcast.

Samantha [01:13:39]:
Woohoo.

Lisa [01:13:40]:
Woohoo. Tell your friends. Our Facebook page hasn't grown in a while. Our YouTube page, right? We keep getting some guy who's emailing us saying, you need to do this with your. With your YouTube page. I'm like, dude, no. Like we're trying to just do it naturally.

Samantha [01:13:55]:
Yeah. I'm not paying for it.

Lisa [01:13:57]:
We're not paying for it, Right? We're just doing this.

Samantha [01:13:59]:
We have no money.

Lisa [01:14:00]:
We have no money. So stop messaging us, right? Cuz we got no money for you. Right? We'll figure it out. We just need our people. That's all. We just need our people. Anyways, Samantha, I got nothing else either. Always a pleasure.

Samantha [01:14:16]:
It should be.

Lisa [01:14:27]:
Who's a pretty girl? I'm a pretty girl.