Airplane Attire, Fantasy Football and The Pickle Craze

Samantha [00:00:03]:
Hey. We're back with another episode of I Shake My Head.

Lisa [00:00:07]:
Hello, friends of the podcast. Hello, everybody. Samantha.

Samantha [00:00:13]:
Lisa.

Lisa [00:00:14]:
Oh, my goodness. I gotta tell you something right off the hop. Uh-oh. Here's can this just can we keep this between us, me, and you?

Samantha [00:00:23]:
Sure.

Lisa [00:00:24]:
No. It doesn't go any further than me and you. It's kind of embarrassing. Okay?

Samantha [00:00:27]:
Okay.

Lisa [00:00:28]:
I have to do better maintenance on my peach fuzz because it's really sunny outside lately. Right?

Samantha [00:00:37]:
I know, and it gets a little out of Oh my

Lisa [00:00:40]:
god. Right? All of a

Samantha [00:00:43]:
sudden, it looks like you're, like, a wolf. And

Lisa [00:00:47]:
and and here's the worst part. I didn't happen to notice it. Guess who

Samantha [00:00:52]:
did? Michael. Oh, and he's so mean when he does that stuff. He's not mean. He's just, like, so deadpanned.

Lisa [00:01:01]:
It's just so deadpan. He's like, hey, when you have your shower tonight, you might wanna just, like, prove up your face.

Samantha [00:01:12]:
I'm like, what? So, of course, I pulled down

Lisa [00:01:13]:
the mirror. We're in the car. I pulled down the mirror. I'm like, it doesn't look that bad. And then all of a sudden, the sun hit. He goes, pretend you're looking into the light. And I'm like, oh, Girl looks like she's growing a fuzzy beard. Girl, no.

Samantha [00:01:26]:
Yeah. Every once in a while, I catch my face and I'm like, oh, that looks a little Right?

Lisa [00:01:32]:
What do you do? What is it? Is it a knife? Is it that knife one that you do?

Samantha [00:01:36]:
Oh, yeah. Because if you dermaplane, you can, like, get those razor knife things, and you can, like

Lisa [00:01:40]:
I sell them at the dollar store, hey.

Samantha [00:01:42]:
I know. But then you have to, like, wash your face, oil your face, make sure that you're because because, you know, you could hurt yourself. Like, you could make your face raw. Like, it's not good. But what do you do?

Lisa [00:01:53]:
Do you just use a razor? I sometimes use Nair for face. You could do that. Right? But but Nair for face comes with a bad smell.

Samantha [00:02:01]:
Yes. And that's so 1970.

Lisa [00:02:03]:
And it smells like it's 1970s too. Right?

Samantha [00:02:07]:
Because they don't need to change the formula.

Lisa [00:02:10]:
Right. Because it works. Right? It just burns that shit off, burns that fuzz off your face.

Samantha [00:02:14]:
I think I couldn't use that. My face is too sensitive for that shit.

Lisa [00:02:17]:
I know you have sensitive skin. I don't really have that sensitive of skin, but I'm like, I don't know. Okay. But who says we can't just use a Bic razor? Why can't we just shave it?

Samantha [00:02:25]:
You can. It'll it doesn't matter what you use. It'll come back. You just gonna have it.

Lisa [00:02:29]:
Once we've because once we've started.

Samantha [00:02:31]:
Yeah. Well, no, because it doesn't matter. Like, your hair doesn't grow back thicker. That's a

Lisa [00:02:36]:
wives' tale. That's a wives' tale. Oh, my goodness. I always worry. Right? Because remember that lady in the circus?

Samantha [00:02:46]:
You're not gonna be a woman with a beard. I don't

Lisa [00:02:49]:
wanna be the bearded lady because, Raquel, I'm just fuzzy.

Samantha [00:02:52]:
Yes. Okay. Yeah. Like, I mean, it's bad enough that there's whiskers growing from your chin and your neck and your lip and your like, everything is protruding. It's like

Lisa [00:03:03]:
a crazy Yes. Worst feeling is taking your bottom lip and putting it over your top lip. What is that feeling there? Oh, it's a little oh, it's a little pokey. Oh, yeah. Like, I don't shave my top lip but I'm like, it feels like maybe I do.

Samantha [00:03:16]:
Yeah. So it's not good. It's not good.

Lisa [00:03:19]:
That's just between us. Peach fuzz alert. Peach fuzz alert. Just between us. Okay? I don't need the world quiet. I'm fuzzy like that.

Samantha [00:03:27]:
No. You got a little PFA peach fuzz alert.

Lisa [00:03:30]:
Right? It's just a peach fuzz alert. It's not necessary. Hey. Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness.

Samantha [00:03:36]:
Right? God.

Lisa [00:03:37]:
But then it brings me to my next weird topic. So I feel weird and weird topics. You know why? You know why, Samantha? Why? I'm still suffering from your cold. I still have your cold. So my mood goes from I'm all over the place, right? So I'm moody, I'm mean, I'm cranky, I'm happy Oh my mad, I'm sad. I'm all of it.

Samantha [00:03:58]:
Okay. So and the reason why I know that is because yesterday your texts were, Oh, my God. 5 Faces of Eve has come out to play. She can't choose. A one has to go to save her freaking life.

Lisa [00:04:13]:
Right? Like, stop it. I picked a whole week's worth, a whole month's worth. Stay tuned, friends of the podcast.

Samantha [00:04:21]:
Oh my god. You were all over the map. And I'm like, Stop it.

Lisa [00:04:26]:
I know, right? It's because of you. I blame you.

Samantha [00:04:30]:
I am over my cold.

Lisa [00:04:32]:
Every time I reach for a Kleenex and blow my nose, you know what I think? I blow my nose, and I go, Fucking Sam. You've been called on the carpet so many times in the last couple days. Crazy.

Samantha [00:04:44]:
I have no doubt.

Lisa [00:04:45]:
You didn't even know how mad I was at you at 10 o'clock this morning, did you? I was so mad at you. And then, like, last night at 2 AM, when I couldn't breathe, I was so pissed off at you, it wasn't even funny.

Samantha [00:04:55]:
And you know what? Don't care.

Lisa [00:04:58]:
I felt that from you. I felt that you were not too concerned about how I was feeling

Samantha [00:05:04]:
with it. I'm really not because, you know, you've given me colds. You were the plague.

Lisa [00:05:10]:
I was the plague in January. Yeah. And in January, I remember, I set us off. Yeah. I know.

Samantha [00:05:17]:
So I don't feel bad for you.

Lisa [00:05:19]:
It is what it is, right? Another beautiful week in Saskatoon. Yeah. And if this is your first time listening to the podcast, that's in Saskatchewan, Canada, Friends of the podcast. Yeah. Alright. So you know how I get so excited because on Saturdays, I get to do the grocery sometimes? Yes. But there's certain things that I don't like to get. Right? Yes.

Lisa [00:05:39]:
So I have a new item to add to the list.

Samantha [00:05:41]:
Oh my god.

Lisa [00:05:43]:
First off, I'm not even gonna reveal what it is. This is my question for you. I asked my boss this and now I'm gonna ask you this. Are you a 1 ply, a 2 ply, or a 3 ply girl?

Samantha [00:05:55]:
I'm more comfortable between the 2 and the 3. There's no in between.

Lisa [00:05:59]:
There's not a 2a half ply.

Samantha [00:06:00]:
No. I know. But usually, I get 2

Lisa [00:06:02]:
ply. Okay. So I went grocery shopping this week and I bought 3 ply. Fancy. Fancy. Fancy.

Samantha [00:06:11]:
Did you pay a lot of money for that 3 ply? No. It was,

Lisa [00:06:14]:
like, 8 rolls for $10. I thought that seemed reasonable.

Samantha [00:06:17]:
No. That's expensive.

Lisa [00:06:18]:
Oh, okay. So it tells you I don't apparently buy toilet paper in the house very often. I thought it was a steal. I'm like, that seems like a steal. I will fake it.

Samantha [00:06:29]:
No. You should be paying for 8, you should be paying be paying under 10, for sure. Wow. Anything over 10, it has to have at least 12 rolls.

Lisa [00:06:38]:
Did not know that. Did not know that. You know what else, though? Is it odd that I did not know what ply the Gibson's use? We are not 3 ply people. We're not 3 pliers. No. We're 2 plies. Okay. Because 3 ply 3 ply comes with issues.

Samantha [00:06:58]:
Well Right? What do you think

Lisa [00:07:00]:
your issues are? I don't think I have any. It's thicker. So so if you use too much of it, I'm assuming the issue is it may not flush.

Samantha [00:07:08]:
It's possible, right?

Lisa [00:07:09]:
But I got to tell you this, right? Because right now girls using it feels good. Feels good.

Samantha [00:07:16]:
Okay. I

Lisa [00:07:17]:
thought that this morning. I'm like, This is okay. This is how the rich folk live.

Samantha [00:07:22]:
You should just not be getting that much enjoyment out of your toilet paper. You just really shouldn't.

Lisa [00:07:28]:
I did. That's all I thought. This is this is how the rich folk live right now. Oprah Winfrey, she's wiping her hoo with 3 ply, and it feels good. Mhmm.

Samantha [00:07:37]:
Gold plate 3 ply.

Lisa [00:07:38]:
I get it. I totally get it. Right?

Samantha [00:07:41]:
Okay. But with that 3 ply also comes the ability for it to, like, I don't know, get a little bit

Lisa [00:07:50]:
Does it stick to you? Yeah.

Samantha [00:07:52]:
So Right. You know, you gotta be careful.

Lisa [00:07:55]:
Because if it's sticking, you know what else is sticking? The contents on

Samantha [00:07:57]:
it is sticking. Right? So you gotta be careful how much you're using because you don't wanna get too crazy down there.

Lisa [00:08:03]:
But it's but you don't and you don't wanna leave remnants because that's gross. Right? Nothing worse than watching the next time and going, oh, apparently, I did not do a proper job.

Samantha [00:08:14]:
Oh my god. Why do we always end up talking about this, Doug?

Lisa [00:08:18]:
Because it's just a real life thing. I did not know that we were 2 ply people.

Samantha [00:08:23]:
I bet your husband thought you spent too much much on your toilet paper.

Lisa [00:08:26]:
I don't think it was that. I think it's because we live in an apartment, and what if it's too thick to go down the drain or down the the toilet or whatever?

Samantha [00:08:33]:
Well, that's true then. Don't use a lot. Are you getting overly excited about it?

Lisa [00:08:38]:
Nope. Well, I could. I could now. I certainly, certainly could. You go to you try a roll of 3 ply and you let you get back to me.

Samantha [00:08:46]:
Alright, Liselle.

Lisa [00:08:47]:
You let me know how it goes. Right? I'm just saying. Right? I shook my head at the fact that I did not know what ply we used. I had no clue. I don't pay attention to shit like that. You're so gross. It's not gross. It's just It's a little bit gross.

Lisa [00:09:04]:
It'd be gross if stuff stuck to it.

Samantha [00:09:06]:
Uh-huh. Gross. I just wanna I just wanna say that I have a bone to pick with you. Okay. I'm ready. I sent you a a really good quip of one liner last week because it was sent it to me? Yeah. I sent I sent it to you text, and I and I sent it to you. And it was, hey, the wind is too windy today.

Lisa [00:09:31]:
Oh, yeah.

Samantha [00:09:32]:
I'm in the And I was hoping for, like, you know, a typical Lisa reply. I got nothing from you. I got nothing. It's like you didn't care. It's like you were like.

Lisa [00:09:41]:
I didn't find it that funny.

Samantha [00:09:43]:
I didn't think was pithy. I don't know why you didn't jump on the chance to, like, you know, join me in the wind is too windy. This is your whole shtick. Is it because you didn't think of it? That's why you're jealous. You jealous that I shot

Lisa [00:09:58]:
of the wind Definitely not. Jealous. No. Never jealous. Because I would have been like, Hey, Samantha. Don't you find that the it's it was in how you worded it. You made it a statement, not a question. You said, The wind is too windy.

Lisa [00:10:11]:
I would have messaged you and said, hey, Samantha. Don't you find that the wind seems kind of windy with a question? Oh my god. Look, it makes it totally different.

Samantha [00:10:21]:
Wait. That's it.

Lisa [00:10:22]:
Makes it seem like one needs to reply because they're being asked a question as opposed to giving a statement. No. I didn't. Sorry. Mhmm.

Samantha [00:10:30]:
But I felt bad. No, you didn't.

Lisa [00:10:32]:
I felt bad.

Samantha [00:10:33]:
Because when I mentioned it on Friday, you didn't even care. You're, like, Oh, yeah. That's right.

Lisa [00:10:38]:
I know because you tried it again and I still didn't I still didn't give you the appropriate response. I was like,

Samantha [00:10:45]:
Yeah. You are my humor. You are not my target audience. My parents are my target audience.

Lisa [00:10:51]:
They I'm too young.

Samantha [00:10:52]:
They appreciate me.

Lisa [00:10:53]:
Good. I appreciate you, but I just I didn't really get that one too much. What I did enjoy is how much it drove you crazy that I did appreciate it.

Samantha [00:11:02]:
Yes. Yes.

Lisa [00:11:03]:
Right? That put a little that put a little in my day.

Samantha [00:11:07]:
Oh, you know what I did find? I found, I found in my travels a new, ChapStick, a new SPF 30 ChapStick. A Chapstick. Yeah. Apparently, I can find them and you cannot.

Lisa [00:11:22]:
Yeah. Because, dear Chapstick, you don't come with SPF. We were at the lake, friends of the podcast. We were at the lake when we had our summer lake vacation.

Samantha [00:11:31]:
Uh-huh.

Lisa [00:11:31]:
And for the first day, I had 5 different chapsticks I was using. Not one of them had SPF.

Samantha [00:11:38]:
That's because you That's why

Lisa [00:11:39]:
you didn't shop well. I I just assumed that everything came with SPF in it. Why are we making it? Why are we not? Everything a moisturizer comes with SPF. Everything comes with SPF. But the shit that goes on your lips, no SPF.

Samantha [00:11:55]:
Well, the ones I bought do. And then the printing's so little.

Lisa [00:11:59]:
I'm like, I can't even see it. Can you tell me if

Samantha [00:12:01]:
it has SPF, please? Get your magnifying glass out there.

Lisa [00:12:05]:
Dear ChapStick, like, you gotta do better. I'm not the only one just assuming that there's SPF. I have a confession to make though was your confession, Samantha. I used

Samantha [00:12:17]:
I used yours. Yes. I know. But, apparently, your lips still rotted so that wasn't good.

Lisa [00:12:22]:
I know because I had gone a whole day with no SPF, and and my lips knew it. They knew it. They knew it.

Samantha [00:12:29]:
Yes. And because you don't seek shade when you're supposed to.

Lisa [00:12:31]:
I don't seek. I'm not a baby. I don't need shade.

Samantha [00:12:34]:
But I have a Schim fashion.

Lisa [00:12:36]:
Okay.

Samantha [00:12:39]:
The SPF Chapstick that I bought, the sun bum or sun bum, whatever I bought.

Lisa [00:12:45]:
The wet wet?

Samantha [00:12:46]:
Yes. The wet one. The banana flavored one that you enjoyed.

Lisa [00:12:49]:
We used to wet.

Samantha [00:12:52]:
It dropped to the floor and rolled underneath the bed in the cabin. I got down on my knees and I'm like, That's too far. And I'm like, My leg's still sitting there.

Lisa [00:13:03]:
So if next year we need a chopstick Potentially, it could save that. There's an air scrub. Of course, you're not picking that up. I wouldn't

Samantha [00:13:12]:
have picked that up either. Yeah. Because I was like, that is that's too far.

Lisa [00:13:15]:
I drop a nickel on the floor right beside me. I'm like,

Samantha [00:13:19]:
I kick it

Lisa [00:13:20]:
I kick it under my desk. Kick it away. Right? It's like the people it's like if you drop an ice cube out of your ice box, right, and it falls on the floor, nobody's picking it up. You're kicking it under the under the fridge.

Samantha [00:13:33]:
Yep. So just let it melt and dry because we're that lazy.

Lisa [00:13:38]:
How did we get that lazy?

Samantha [00:13:39]:
No. Because you know what? No. I think we're getting to an age that we were not entirely sure of our mobility. We're sure no, no.

Lisa [00:13:47]:
We're sure of our mobility. We're sure that if I'm that mobile that I can pick that up, I certainly won't be able to do it again. Right? And I might be able to get

Samantha [00:13:56]:
down there,

Lisa [00:13:56]:
but I sure as hell can't get back up.

Samantha [00:13:58]:
Oh my god. Like, when you you fell coming out of the water.

Lisa [00:14:04]:
Remember, I fell coming out

Samantha [00:14:05]:
of the water? Oh my god. I'm like, I don't know if I could get you back up. But Your job.

Lisa [00:14:12]:
Right? Bambi's down. Right? I look mighty, but my little legs are just little sticks that have no force behind them.

Samantha [00:14:23]:
Yeah. She really is Humpty Dumpty.

Lisa [00:14:25]:
Totally. Right? And I took a tumble. I took a tumble getting out of the water and, boom, I was down. Yeah. It

Samantha [00:14:30]:
wasn't pretty. Wasn't pretty.

Lisa [00:14:32]:
It was not pretty at all. It wasn't pretty at all, Samantha. It was not pretty. Okay. So we, we did a little TikTok ing. We did. It didn't hit like I thought it would.

Samantha [00:14:45]:
No. But No. No. The sentiment was still the same.

Lisa [00:14:48]:
The sentiment was still the same. Okay. So friends in the podcast, you know Donald Trump's running for American politics for the president of the United States, and you know his running mate is worse than him, JD Vance. Also sounds this also stands for just disgusting because that's what he is. He's just disgusting. Anyways, we had to get into it. Right? We had to do a TikTok about the shameless. This What is it?

Samantha [00:15:15]:
The shameless? No. It's childish cat ladies. The child. Child No. Childless. Childless. Childless cat ladies in the Democratic party are ruining the country.

Lisa [00:15:25]:
We're ruining and we're not even Democrats.

Samantha [00:15:27]:
I'm not Democrat. So No.

Lisa [00:15:29]:
But we are childless.

Samantha [00:15:31]:
I am a childless cat lady.

Lisa [00:15:32]:
But you don't have a

Samantha [00:15:33]:
cat anymore. Oh, I don't have a cat anymore. I have a cat.

Lisa [00:15:36]:
I'm I have a cat. Yeah. It's just so weird. Right? Like like, that this guy is just outspoken this shit.

Samantha [00:15:45]:
It's I believe what he thinks people wanna hear. I think he thinks that that's what the Republican voters wanna hear. People are

Lisa [00:15:52]:
laughing this up.

Samantha [00:15:53]:
He well, he spoke about this was back in 2021, so he was already, you know, piled the trot.

Lisa [00:15:58]:
Yeah. Totally. Right? It's been a while for sure. It's just kinda weird and it's I don't know. Like, I just think like like, dude, what you doing? What you doing? Sometimes I think like like, I wish Lisa and Sam could be there to just be like,

Samantha [00:16:12]:
No. I don't wanna be there. I hate politics. You're gonna be there in

Lisa [00:16:16]:
the thick of it. No.

Samantha [00:16:17]:
I'm not gonna be there in the thick of it. Kind of. But I am curious about how DT met JD because I don't understand how I don't understand how this JD guy switched from, I hate Trump and Trump's an idiot blah blah blah to now being his running mate?

Lisa [00:16:33]:
To now being his running mate. I don't get that. I don't. They say it just because he wants to be the next president, which I get. That would be your goal in politics. Right?

Samantha [00:16:40]:
He's only 39 years old. That's quite young. Isn't it? And Usually, they don't pick guys in their seventies to be president.

Lisa [00:16:48]:
But it's funny because have you seen now this is this is this sounds petty. I'm gonna sound petty. I'm going there. I'm gonna be petty. Okay. Jude wears eyeliner, hey? He does not. There's pictures of his eyes up close. He's he's got pretty eyes.

Samantha [00:17:03]:
I think that's probably his eyelashes then. No. There's black. I don't he's wearing eyeliner. Black. I'm Don't spread that rumor.

Lisa [00:17:12]:
Friends of the podcast, Google JD Vance eyeliner. There's gonna be pictures. There's pictures. Due to and I that's fine. Each is their own. Right? We're we're inclusive. We just love. Wear your eyeliner.

Lisa [00:17:25]:
I don't care. I'm just saying. Right?

Samantha [00:17:28]:
Okay. Well, now I'm gonna have to Google after the show because He's saying

Lisa [00:17:32]:
he's got really few. A really pretty eyes.

Samantha [00:17:35]:
I'm sure he does, but I doubt that it's eyeliner. It's eyeliner. It's the

Lisa [00:17:39]:
I noticed. Liner. You can tell. You can tell.

Samantha [00:17:41]:
Oh, liquid. You would know liquid from a crayon. It is a

Lisa [00:17:46]:
liquid liner.

Samantha [00:17:47]:
You don't know that shit.

Lisa [00:17:49]:
I can tell.

Samantha [00:17:50]:
I know things. No, you can't. I know things.

Lisa [00:17:52]:
Kathryn Rubino: No, you can't. Yes. It's total liquid liner.

Samantha [00:17:56]:
You don't know a pencil from a liquid.

Lisa [00:17:59]:
Hi. A liquid would be like liquid paper. I know the difference between liquid paper and a pencil.

Samantha [00:18:04]:
Yes. It's very much like liquid paper.

Lisa [00:18:06]:
So it's liquid. It's liquid liner. You can tell it's too clean. It looks like paint. It looks like

Samantha [00:18:12]:
Oh, my God.

Lisa [00:18:13]:
Right? I'm just saying, right?

Samantha [00:18:14]:
Stop it.

Lisa [00:18:15]:
I'm just saying. Stop it. I'm just saying. Made us shake our heads. Him all up in everybody's grill.

Samantha [00:18:21]:
It oh, yes. We are definitely shaking our heads Shaking our heads.

Lisa [00:18:25]:
At anything That comes out of his It's a little decorated.

Samantha [00:18:29]:
It's a little preposterous, And I I feel like women of the United States

Lisa [00:18:35]:
Don't you dare.

Samantha [00:18:36]:
Band together.

Lisa [00:18:37]:
Right. Don't you dare. Figure it out. Figure it out, right?

Samantha [00:18:40]:
I'm sure they will. I see it. I know they're coming together. Here we go. Here we go. Here we go. Here we go. Here we go.

Lisa [00:18:47]:
Here we go. Go. It's gonna happen.

Samantha [00:18:49]:
I know. But I got something else I gotta talk about. K?

Lisa [00:18:52]:
I feel like we're just are we just airing our laundry today? No.

Samantha [00:18:55]:
No. Well, I don't know. Depends because the Internet is weighing in on this one, actually. Oh, k. It's whether or it's whether or not it is socially acceptable to wear sweatpants on a plane.

Lisa [00:19:07]:
Well, it is not.

Samantha [00:19:09]:
It's socially it's not socially acceptable?

Lisa [00:19:12]:
K. What do you mean by sweatpants? When I think of sweatpants, I think a big baggy with a cuff? Or or or are we thinking a legging?

Samantha [00:19:19]:
No. No. Not a legging. Sweats. Then I say no. No to sweat. No. But I see I see people in full running gear getting onto the plane with their red

Lisa [00:19:27]:
white shoes. Because they're sprinting. I get we want to be comfortable on the plane. I understand that.

Samantha [00:19:45]:
Okay. 1, don't uh-uh me because I'm not agreeing with this Oh my god. For years. Are you putting that on me? From years you me. Uh-uh. Don't don't. Stop it.

Lisa [00:19:56]:
Today, I just got my uh-uh. You've uh-uh made for years. Uh-uh. Okay. Uh-uh.

Samantha [00:20:03]:
So I agree. I don't think sweat should be on a plane, but, you know, I don't think there's etiquette. I don't think there's an actual, like, etiquette to what you can wear on a plane.

Lisa [00:20:13]:
Okay. Then let's do this way. Okay? Because I feel you're I feel you're you're you're you're you're on the cusp. You're not

Samantha [00:20:18]:
I'm not on the cusp.

Lisa [00:20:19]:
I feel the you feel your cusp again. So here's the thing.

Samantha [00:20:22]:
Don't make me shake my head at you.

Lisa [00:20:28]:
Stop. I was today years old when I learned the word.

Samantha [00:20:34]:
Uh-uh. Uh-uh. Uh-uh. Uh-uh. K. Listen. It's like a 2 year old. Uh-uh.

Lisa [00:20:39]:
I feel that there's a part of you that's contemplating that it's okay if women are in their sweatpants, but not the men. Okay.

Samantha [00:20:47]:
So the difference between women in sweatpants and men in sweatpants is that the men in sweatpants are probably looser than

Lisa [00:20:54]:
a goose, and it's nasty. And I don't need

Samantha [00:20:56]:
to see that because every time I see a man in sweatpants, it makes me think The Jack Black movie.

Lisa [00:21:03]:
Not totally. He was running. And he was running in his schlong. His schlong was

Samantha [00:21:10]:
up and down this side. Way that way.

Lisa [00:21:12]:
Right? Because here's the thing. Right? I don't wanna sit beside the dude in sweatpants because I feel there's enough of us already touching in that small plane. I don't need my arms to be that close to a strange man's schlong.

Samantha [00:21:26]:
In here. Are you in his lap? Where's your arm? Where do you put them?

Lisa [00:21:30]:
You're sharing an armrest or you have to establish

Samantha [00:21:33]:
Where? Where is your arm?

Lisa [00:21:34]:
Say he has the armrest. Say he has the armrest back. Your arm is just beside you. Where's his where's his dick? Right there beside you on his pants.

Samantha [00:21:42]:
Oh my god. Think about it.

Lisa [00:21:43]:
Think about you sitting there.

Samantha [00:21:44]:
Your arms and hands to yourself.

Lisa [00:21:47]:
I know but where do they go?

Samantha [00:21:48]:
They go on my lap. What? They're doing autoplay. Go on

Lisa [00:21:51]:
my lap, but I don't wanna be touching. Legs always touch.

Samantha [00:21:56]:
Oh my god.

Lisa [00:21:57]:
Legs always touch. I don't wanna fly with you now. I think you're gonna get me kicked off a plane. Well, keep your dick in your pants. Keep it away from me then.

Samantha [00:22:08]:
Oh my god. You're so disgusting. I'm not disgusting. Okay. But besides your disgusting habits or

Lisa [00:22:16]:
not on a plane?

Samantha [00:22:22]:
Or not on a plane?

Lisa [00:22:23]:
Like, we can dress down but we don't have to look like we're

Samantha [00:22:26]:
at the flea market. Okay. But how down are we going?

Lisa [00:22:29]:
Not that down. Not that down. Right? Okay. So should we be dressed like we're going to the Walmart to go on the plane? That's what we're asking, friends.

Samantha [00:22:41]:
Are you wearing pajama pants on a plane?

Lisa [00:22:45]:
I bet some are.

Samantha [00:22:46]:
I've seen that.

Lisa [00:22:47]:
I bet some are. Oh my god. No. Then that just means, right, if this is where we're headed, if we're if this is where our the thought process goes, then it means that we have to years ago, we gotta bring this phrase back. It needs to come back. Years ago, we had a phrase and it was called, have you seen you? Have you seen you? And it implied so it implied that people lived in homes without mirrors.

Samantha [00:23:14]:
Yes. Because if they had mirrors, they would not have

Lisa [00:23:16]:
gone out in public looking like they did. Hence the phrase, Have you seen you? Yeah. Right? So I feel that there needs to be a person at the airport saying, k. Last name Gibson, have you seen you? Yes, I have. K. Pass. You're good. Thank you for not wearing your sweatpants today.

Lisa [00:23:36]:
Right?

Samantha [00:23:37]:
Too many people, they just don't care about how they present themselves. And I think when you show when you care about your, you know, your self, you just feel better about yourself. But I do shake my head at the ones that do not.

Lisa [00:23:53]:
I shake my head at the ones that do not.

Samantha [00:23:56]:
I shake my head at that because it just takes a moment to, like, I don't know, take a shower, comb your hair, brush your teeth, put on good clean clothes even if you

Lisa [00:24:03]:
don't wanna do all of that. Okay? Let's just say you're not good at shower. Like, at least brush your hair and put on clean clothes.

Samantha [00:24:09]:
At least. And you brush your teeth.

Lisa [00:24:11]:
And and then let's just say you're not about to clean clothes. Okay? At least just like put on the cleanest ones you have in the pile.

Samantha [00:24:18]:
Oh, and maybe some deodorant.

Lisa [00:24:20]:
We sound we sound horrible.

Samantha [00:24:21]:
We are judgmenting.

Lisa [00:24:24]:
We're judgmenting

Samantha [00:24:24]:
right now. We're judgmenting? That's not a word. We're we're being judgmental.

Lisa [00:24:29]:
Here's the thing, Samantha. We're just saying what our friends of the podcast are thinking. Yes. Because Everybody does it. We all think it.

Samantha [00:24:37]:
Friends of the podcast, you must feel the same way.

Lisa [00:24:39]:
It's not just Lisa and Sam that look at people and go, oh, have you seen you?

Samantha [00:24:42]:
No. Have you seen you?

Lisa [00:24:44]:
It's not just us. Right?

Samantha [00:24:45]:
It's different if you're own in your own home. It's different if you're at the lake and in your cabin or in your tent and you're just schlepping around. Totally different. It's different. Right. Different.

Lisa [00:24:54]:
Yeah. Right? Yeah. You know? It's totally, totally different.

Samantha [00:24:58]:
Has to be a little decorum somewhere, right?

Lisa [00:25:00]:
There has to be some decorum. Right? There has to be some decorum. Right? But I

Samantha [00:25:05]:
will say this, Lisa, that as I watch more social media, the more I shake my head at humans and think, let's bring back the phrase, be the adult in your life.

Lisa [00:25:17]:
Oh, that's a phrase you love, near and dear

Samantha [00:25:19]:
to your heart. And people look at me like, what does that mean? I'm like, I think you know what it means. It means that I don't think you're being the adult in your life and you need to grow the fuck up.

Lisa [00:25:28]:
Right. Grow the fuck up. Right? Just grow up. Be the adult in

Samantha [00:25:32]:
your life. Make the decisions. They're hard. Decisions are hard. Decisions are hard. Decisions suck. Sometimes They're both just suck. Sometimes they're not great.

Lisa [00:25:40]:
That's why they sound like it's a negative thought process. It's like Negative

Samantha [00:25:44]:
thought process.

Lisa [00:25:44]:
It's like I do things we don't like sometimes. Right.

Samantha [00:25:46]:
That's why you're an adult. So be the adult in your life.

Lisa [00:25:49]:
Be the adult in your life. Right?

Samantha [00:25:51]:
Like, all that's all that I see and I all I think on the social media, and I'm like, oh my god. Be the adult in your life.

Lisa [00:25:57]:
Be the adult in your life. Right? What are you doing? Right? And you know what? Stop letting your cat be the boss in your house. The cat is not the boss in your house, dear TikTok.

Samantha [00:26:09]:
How did the cat become part

Lisa [00:26:10]:
of this conversation? Because there is no adults in their lives because they let the cat own the house.

Samantha [00:26:19]:
Are you just watching cat videos? I love cat videos.

Lisa [00:26:24]:
I like cats better than dogs. I like cat videos better than dog videos. You've seen one cute puppy, you've seen them all. Right? Or you've seen one orange cat, she's pissing off another orange cat the next time. Right?

Samantha [00:26:36]:
She's messing up the owner upside the head. So everybody

Lisa [00:26:41]:
needs to be the adults in their lives. Exactly. That's what I'm saying. K. I've got something for you. And I wanna thank you at the end of this because not too often something this comes across my table for you. Okay? You know how Remember the other night I said to you, Hey, it looks like you got a new wrinkle in your eye? I didn't. Well, it looked like you did.

Lisa [00:27:07]:
I didn't.

Samantha [00:27:08]:
I think you've covered it up. You said I had a blue vein and I was probably popping out because I had to have a dinner with you.

Lisa [00:27:16]:
You have a blue vein which is gonna cause a wrinkle. Right? So Okay. Anyways, that's fine. Right? It's okay. You're 50 almost 56. You're gonna you're starting to wrinkle. It's good. Uh-huh.

Lisa [00:27:28]:
I've got something for you. This is what I'm trying to say. Let me say it. Let me say it to men. Right? You and the HHG, who's one of our besties, sometimes talk about Botox, right? Uh-huh. Yeah. Michelle is a big

Samantha [00:27:47]:
fan of Botox. I have yet

Lisa [00:27:48]:
to try it. I don't need it. Look at my forehead. Oh, stop it. Anyways

Samantha [00:27:53]:
I hope one day you look like

Lisa [00:27:54]:
a Sherpa. Well, I come from that so fingers crossed. Somebody's going there in my family. Right? However, we have kind of how long it we should have been there by now. Yeah. So maybe maybe the good Lord's giving us a break. Let me tell you my great thing. Okay.

Lisa [00:28:13]:
K. So you don't need to get Botox because it's too expensive. Right? Uh-huh. Instead, you can order what they call wrinkle patches. Uh-huh. And they're just like patches that you put on your wrinkle faces your wrinkle places at night. Uh-huh. And in the morning, you just take them off and voila.

Lisa [00:28:32]:
Voila. Not as many wrinkles

Samantha [00:28:35]:
or they're not as deep as what they are now. I love I love it when you think you find the new next best thing because you are 10 decades behind me. I'm not. I'm not. Yes, you are.

Lisa [00:28:48]:
I saw this, and I'm like, I know who needs a sprinkler.

Samantha [00:28:51]:
I know about all the kinds of wrinkle patches, and I do believe Michelle probably knows even more than me.

Lisa [00:28:57]:
Are you guys using are

Samantha [00:28:58]:
you guys using the wrinkle patch? No. Because wrinkle patches still cost a lot of money.

Lisa [00:29:02]:
Well, they're cheaper than the Botox.

Samantha [00:29:05]:
These ones work 24.99.

Lisa [00:29:07]:
You got

Samantha [00:29:08]:
12 in a pack. Oh, my god. Yes. Then they must work for 24.99. 12 in a pack. I will not get, like, some skin rash at all from that. No. Not me.

Lisa [00:29:21]:
Not you. Well, you know what, Samantha? I'm just saying. Right? I'm being a good friend.

Samantha [00:29:25]:
You should get them for your little wrinkles.

Lisa [00:29:27]:
That's not a wrinkle. That's like a yucky disgusting growth on my end. I got by these back friends for the podcast. That's what she does. That's what she does. I do something nice to

Samantha [00:29:36]:
help her. Like, what? You gotta cure for your ugly wrinkles, and she

Lisa [00:29:40]:
has to be mean back. You know what, Samantha?

Samantha [00:29:43]:
Oh my god. Yes. You're being so nice to me right now by pointing out the fact I have deep wrinkles.

Lisa [00:29:49]:
Well, the wrinkle patch can make it less deep. You know what? You're being impossible. I think we better take a break. Okay. So I'm just saying, you do with that information what you choose. Whatever, Lisa. It's not gonna hurt. I'm sure it won't.

Lisa [00:30:09]:
It won't hurt you. That's what I'm saying. Well, you know, it didn't

Samantha [00:30:12]:
hurt me last night, but I watched a documentary with Howie Mandel.

Lisa [00:30:16]:
Oh, I don't how do we how do you I'm sensing you love him. No.

Samantha [00:30:20]:
I I can you know, he's okay. Okay. I I I was just curious because he's Canadian, and I was just, like, oh, what's this? And it was on TV, and it's called Howie Mandel, but enough about me. I was, like, that's funny. And the thing is, watching it, I forgot that he did, the Bobby voice Okay. Which was also a voice for another character. And that very same voice was Gizmo from the Gremlin movie. Right.

Lisa [00:30:46]:
I remember he did Saint, Saint Elsewhere.

Samantha [00:30:48]:
He did Saint Elsewhere. He was also on Johnny Carson 22 times.

Lisa [00:30:54]:
Wow. That's a pretty big accomplishment. But do

Samantha [00:30:56]:
you know who got him onto the Johnny Carson show? Who? Joan Rivers.

Lisa [00:31:00]:
That's our girl.

Samantha [00:31:01]:
That's our girl.

Lisa [00:31:03]:
That's our you're not the best female comedian in the world. It's her. Joan Rivers. She

Samantha [00:31:08]:
saw him at a comedy club and the next night he was on the Carson show.

Lisa [00:31:12]:
And then she had cars

Samantha [00:31:13]:
and cars and saw him on that show and he kept going back.

Lisa [00:31:18]:
Really?

Samantha [00:31:19]:
He got his butt kicked off the Carson show when he pulled a really dumb skit comedy skit. And Carson was pissed, and he got the call the next day going, you're never you're not allowed. We're done.

Lisa [00:31:31]:
Yeah. We're not. It's over.

Samantha [00:31:33]:
It's over.

Lisa [00:31:33]:
It's over. It's over. But

Samantha [00:31:37]:
I think that's pretty funny. I mean, he's had a pretty interesting career. And he had yeah. He apparently Did you know they had, like, he had a talk show, a daytime talk show? Oh, I vaguely might have remembered that. Like one season, they dressed him up. He was all corporate looking and he looked like an accountant and it's bombed.

Lisa [00:31:56]:
They still have hair? No. I think

Samantha [00:31:59]:
oh, no. Maybe he had it. No. He had hair. And it bombed, and then he basically was blacklisted from

Lisa [00:32:06]:
Well, he was gone for a long time.

Samantha [00:32:07]:
Yeah. And then he got the job with Deal or No Deal and that's what brought him back.

Lisa [00:32:11]:
That's what brought him back. And then he became he became America's Got Talent. Yeah. So,

Samantha [00:32:16]:
he's been doing pretty good.

Lisa [00:32:18]:
He's done okay. He's done okay. He's funny but he's funny in an interesting way, right?

Samantha [00:32:24]:
Uh-huh. Yeah. So he spoke a little he spoke about his mental health and, you know, all the different things that, you know, with his OCD and his, you know, being a germaphobe and all that kind of stuff. And I was I just found it quite interesting, actually. Okay. Well, maybe.

Lisa [00:32:39]:
I don't usually take you up on your advice.

Samantha [00:32:41]:
No. That's why I thought you know, I'm just gonna mention it. She's not gonna watch it though. But I

Lisa [00:32:45]:
might think about it because I like comedy. Right?

Samantha [00:32:49]:
It was just very interesting.

Lisa [00:32:50]:
I watched one show on Netflix and watched all of it and hated the ending.

Samantha [00:32:56]:
It wasn't Netflix, it was Apple TV, whatever.

Lisa [00:32:59]:
They're all the same to me. I'm kind of done with streaming TV.

Samantha [00:33:02]:
Right? You were just mad at the way it ended.

Lisa [00:33:05]:
So stupid. I invested 7 or 8 episodes. So much time. So mad. So mad. I'm not even it's not even gonna roll off my lips. Okay. Right? K.

Lisa [00:33:18]:
Here? K. So I feel I'm in for this. I feel I wanna do all things pickle. Like, there's a pickle craze. I just saw today on the Instagram and there's pickle, pickle iced cupcakes. No. I think I could do it. I think I could do it.

Lisa [00:33:40]:
There's pickled like there's pickled milkshakes? No. Like just pickle flavor in

Samantha [00:33:45]:
the ice? No. I don't need pickled flavored ice cream.

Lisa [00:33:49]:
K. What about pickles in your mayonnaise?

Samantha [00:33:53]:
Well, I already keep tuna fish and mayonnaise and pickles, I guess it would be horrible, but I'm gonna say no on this one. I'm shaking my head. I'm shaking my head at all the things that people are putting pickle stuff into. I shake my head. Yes. Why? Because I don't stop.

Lisa [00:34:08]:
Excuse me? But if we like pickles, why are we bucking the trend?

Samantha [00:34:14]:
I don't you know what? Okay. So this is this is me.

Lisa [00:34:18]:
Let's hear you.

Samantha [00:34:19]:
I don't like sweet and savory together. I You're like You're so weird. I ate it. This is why I barely like barbecue sauce.

Lisa [00:34:28]:
I know. Right? So you don't like the bacon peanut butter burger?

Samantha [00:34:32]:
No. I ate it. I've eaten

Lisa [00:34:33]:
it once. I'll never do that again. I've never eaten it because I think it's weird.

Samantha [00:34:37]:
Yeah. It was fine and tasted fine, but I didn't I don't do sweet with savory. It's not my gig. I don't understand why people do it. That's why I don't understand mustard ice cream, ketchup ice cream, pickle ice cream, pickle cupcakes, anything to any any savory thing, anything like that in with sweet.

Lisa [00:34:58]:
And yet Help me out. For the last 7 years, we've been trying to convince the friends of the podcast that I have the weird food things. I think this is a revelation. I feel it's not Lisa that's a weirdo here. I think you're just as weird as this friendship, Samantha.

Samantha [00:35:13]:
Okay. Okay. So, let's okay. So, weird? Okay. So, fruit, I cannot eat it after a certain time frame.

Lisa [00:35:21]:
Well, I get that. Like, I

Samantha [00:35:22]:
don't want mushy fruit. No. Like, if I don't eat it within a

Lisa [00:35:26]:
day or 2 of buying it, I'm never eating it again. Like, the only thing I'll do is like grapes if they're in the fridge. But like I can look at a watermelon that's prepared by others and I know. I know, I know. It's too red which means it's spongy. Spongy. Nope. I'll pass on spongy watermelon.

Lisa [00:35:46]:
Thanks.

Samantha [00:35:47]:
I just I have such a weird texture thing with fruit and the ripeness of it. It's like bananas too. I've seen people spotted bananas. I'm like,

Lisa [00:36:00]:
no. Like, I didn't buy bananas last week. Number 1, because they weren't chiquita, they were fiffles. Right? I have not I refuse to buy fiffle bananas. What the fuck is a fiffle banana?

Samantha [00:36:11]:
I don't know.

Lisa [00:36:13]:
Like, somebody just made a new sticker for a no name banana.

Samantha [00:36:16]:
Yeah. It's just a weird Why now do we have

Lisa [00:36:17]:
to have no name bananas out in the grocery stores?

Samantha [00:36:20]:
I don't know. I don't understand. There could

Lisa [00:36:22]:
be 25 types of apples. We just want one type of banana. Yep. Can't have it. Can't have it. Right? So you're saying no to pickles.

Samantha [00:36:32]:
I'm I just don't understand pickles in ice cream or pickles in like, maybe pickle mayonnaise, maybe. But even still, I wanna control the, oh, yeah, amount of pickle juice that goes into a mayonnaise, so I probably wouldn't do that.

Lisa [00:36:46]:
Not no. It's not it's like chunks of pickles.

Samantha [00:36:50]:
No. I still no. Then I wouldn't do that.

Lisa [00:36:51]:
No. You wouldn't do that? No. I wouldn't do that. Because then it's just relish. But you don't do relish.

Samantha [00:36:56]:
No. I like relish.

Lisa [00:36:57]:
Oh, you don't do ketchup on a hot dog.

Samantha [00:36:59]:
I don't do ketchup on hamburgers or hotdogs. Weird. I am out of ketchup. I don't do ketchup.

Lisa [00:37:05]:
Yeah. That's the things that ketchup goes on.

Samantha [00:37:08]:
I know. Ketchup, really? Just my french fries?

Lisa [00:37:11]:
I'm the weird one.

Samantha [00:37:14]:
Hi. It's

Lisa [00:37:15]:
me. I'm the problem. It's me. It's totally It's you. Totally me. Totally. Totally me, sweetie.

Samantha [00:37:23]:
But what I think I need us to talk about is the fact that we should probably take magnesium.

Lisa [00:37:29]:
I heard something about magnesium once. It

Samantha [00:37:32]:
promotes good sleep and god knows you need it. So

Lisa [00:37:37]:
Do you ever think it's that I'm sleepy or I'm just not putting up with your shit today? Could be either. It's hard

Samantha [00:37:44]:
to say. You know what? You be you were cranky before we even started this recording. So I'm like, it ain't me, bitch. It ain't me.

Lisa [00:37:53]:
That's fine. You know what? Like I said, I've never said that I that I don't get cranky. Even even sometimes happy go lucky Lisa Gibson has a breaking point. Oh my god.

Samantha [00:38:05]:
Hang on to the hang on to the halo, Lisa. Hi.

Lisa [00:38:08]:
You try being a Blue Jays fan right now and see how you like it.

Samantha [00:38:12]:
Oh, did they trade somebody?

Lisa [00:38:13]:
They traded everybody pretty much.

Samantha [00:38:15]:
Oh, except for Vlad. They didn't

Lisa [00:38:18]:
trade Vlad. They didn't trade the fat guy that you like and Porky. That's about it. That's, like, pretty much everybody else is gone. No. I don't wanna talk about it. Don't make me talk about it. This is a comedy podcast.

Lisa [00:38:28]:
I'm here to have a good time. Did Bo get traded? He's hurt. He's hurt. Oh, so they didn't trade him? No, because he's delicate.

Samantha [00:38:35]:
He's a delicate flower.

Lisa [00:38:38]:
But I think can you buy you could buy magnesium pills but you gotta be careful. So if you take too much magnesium, you'll blow up. My nana, she blew up. Her she took pills. She her electrolytes were a little whack and magnesium's part of that system, I think. I know. I don't know. Don't fact check because I could be making it up too.

Lisa [00:38:57]:
I'm not making up the fact that my nana blew up. My nana blew up. Like, not literally though. Well, that's what we were told. And she blew up? When she died. Yeah. My not not my nanny. Not the one we didn't like.

Lisa [00:39:11]:
Oh. Mommy did like. Right? She blew up. Oh. Yeah. Because she had too much electrolytes shit. Weird. Like, she she, like, she short circuited or something.

Lisa [00:39:22]:
Uh-oh. That's what happens when you tell a 10 year old kid that their grandparent died, and you tell them how they're they become 55 year old adults who think to this day that their nana blew off.

Samantha [00:39:37]:
Totally true. You were traumatized at 10. It carries through

Lisa [00:39:41]:
for decades. It carries and I don't ever think about it. It's been so long, but when it's but when I do, it seems raw still.

Samantha [00:39:52]:
I am not laughing at your tribe.

Lisa [00:39:54]:
I picture a conversation. I picture a conversation between my mom and dad and us kids. What do you mean she blew up? Kids, she's dead. She's dead. She's just dead. Right? And then somebody trying to explain, She just blew up.

Samantha [00:40:07]:
Okay. She just blew up.

Lisa [00:40:09]:
Yeah. My nana, she blew up.

Samantha [00:40:11]:
Do you mean she had a heart attack?

Lisa [00:40:13]:
I don't know. We never maybe. Oh, okay. She I think she short circuited and blew up. You heard the sincerity in my voice as I told the story. Right? That's what happens, parent.

Samantha [00:40:30]:
Okay. Alright. So, slow your slow your roll on the magnesium, friends, of the podcast.

Lisa [00:40:36]:
Right? Maybe don't jump on the boat quite yet. Just find out if there's a chance you can blow up from it. We don't need that on

Samantha [00:40:43]:
our website. No, we do not. Good Lord. That's all we need.

Lisa [00:40:48]:
So sometimes and maybe it's only because I watch the Blue Jays but there's a commercial for Mary Brown's Fried Chicken. Okay. Ever see it? Okay. Yep. And it's like it's like the batter's box. Right? Because it's being promoted for the Blue Jays. Right? Yeah. And they have, like, 6 pieces of chicken, 2 biscuits, a medium fries, and taters.

Lisa [00:41:08]:
Like questions. Nope. Nope. Not tater tots. They're just taters. Is that what they

Samantha [00:41:13]:
call a potato? How do we

Lisa [00:41:15]:
feel about that word, tater?

Samantha [00:41:18]:
It just seems it's reminding it's making me think of the character on Yellowstone called Teeter. She's from Texas.

Lisa [00:41:26]:
I don't understand why we can't call it something different. I have great issue with the word tater because first you think tater tots which is like delightful. It's not those. It's chunks of potatoes. Is it that an is it an American word, American Friends of the podcast? Like, you guys go go you guys go around using the word tater?

Samantha [00:41:47]:
I've never heard it. I mean I mean, I haven't gone east very far east, so maybe it's used over there?

Lisa [00:41:55]:
Like, in the east, like, where I'm from

Samantha [00:41:57]:
the east? Or like PEI or Newfoundland or New Brunswick. Maybe they say Tainor?

Lisa [00:42:02]:
I don't know. I just heard it and I had an instant reaction to it. And I'm like, why are we saying tater?

Samantha [00:42:07]:
Well, you have a very strong negative reaction to it. It's just a potato. It's just a word.

Lisa [00:42:12]:
And let's just call it what it is, a potato. We don't need to short form that.

Samantha [00:42:15]:
But doesn't it sound better as tater?

Lisa [00:42:17]:
No. Sounds Southern. Tater. This is a tater. It sounds like a slang.

Samantha [00:42:21]:
Can you get me some taters?

Lisa [00:42:23]:
Yeah. No, it doesn't sound good. Actually, I feel it does not sound good.

Samantha [00:42:26]:
My name is Tater and I'm from Texas and I need a tater. Right? No. No. There's a lot of t's in that.

Lisa [00:42:33]:
I feel that the word tater needs to

Samantha [00:42:35]:
be banned. Oh my god. Calm down. I don't like it. No. Calm down.

Lisa [00:42:40]:
You don't ever come across a word that you just don't like? There's lots of words I don't like. Yeah. Well

Samantha [00:42:46]:
I just choose not to listen to it or use them.

Lisa [00:42:49]:
I don't like I'm not gonna be using tater going forward. Okay. Congratulations. They're not mashed taters? That's when it sounds hillbilly.

Samantha [00:42:57]:
Yeah. Because we've learned to say marsh potato.

Lisa [00:42:59]:
Right? It sounds hillbilly. Is that am I being bad? Am I being bad?

Samantha [00:43:04]:
A little bit. But you said the word, so it's out there in the world now.

Lisa [00:43:07]:
Why is hillbilly bad? I don't know. Well, my definition and your definition, apparently, are 2 very different things to math.

Samantha [00:43:16]:
I I do believe the word tater is probably in the southern regions of the United States. You know what

Lisa [00:43:22]:
the thing is? It's because I don't like to short form my words.

Samantha [00:43:25]:
No. Because you don't like people calling you lease. There's no need.

Lisa [00:43:28]:
There's just only 4 letters in it. I feel we can say them all.

Samantha [00:43:31]:
Uh-huh. And my and my name is Martha. I'm always Sam, so I'm used to people shortening my name to 3 letters. I hate that. So that's not it's not a big deal, Lisa.

Lisa [00:43:40]:
I hate nicknames except I

Samantha [00:43:41]:
got one at my work. No. You're sprinkles. Sprinkles. Best nickname ever.

Lisa [00:43:49]:
Right? I always wanted a nickname and now I have one.

Samantha [00:43:53]:
She's Prickles. She's poor. Sprinkles. And we have to thank the new lady for that. The new hire?

Lisa [00:44:00]:
The new new? Our new our newest member of our

Samantha [00:44:04]:
of our our work family. Right? She knows she knows you. No. It's me.

Lisa [00:44:10]:
That's what happens when you tell all the people you work with that you eat a donut every day. A sprinkle donut. They're all very fit and they're like, like, what? What? Like, not like, you don't know.

Samantha [00:44:22]:
You don't want it every day. I didn't get a pudgy face for nothing. Okay. I'll keep this girly figure without working on it. Come on, bitch. Let's go get a donut.

Lisa [00:44:32]:
My philosophy is it puts a smile on my face, and why wouldn't I wanna start everyday

Samantha [00:44:36]:
Why wouldn't smile? Why wouldn't you want that, Lisa?

Lisa [00:44:39]:
Right? And I do. Yeah. Every morning at 7:30. Thank you.

Samantha [00:44:44]:
And you know who else puts a smile on their face by eating and doing all the things that they want? Who? Singer May Macy Gray.

Lisa [00:44:50]:
God. That's a name I haven't heard of

Samantha [00:44:52]:
for Yeah.

Lisa [00:44:52]:
She I

Samantha [00:44:53]:
don't know what's been happening to her, but, apparently, her way

Lisa [00:44:57]:
I try to say goodbye and I choke. Uh-huh. You got one?

Samantha [00:45:01]:
Yeah. So, apparently, her way to heal is through cocaine, alcohol, marijuana, and pizza. Look at that recipe for healing? A recipe for addiction?

Lisa [00:45:13]:
Sounds like maybe addiction maybe that's

Samantha [00:45:14]:
a diet of addicts. Is that addiction or just bad life choices? We're not sure.

Lisa [00:45:21]:
I guess it depends how often she's doing that.

Samantha [00:45:23]:
Yeah. But I feel like, you know, this is a nice shake my head moment because we just need to shake our heads of the fact that she thinks that alcohol, cocaine, and marijuana are part of a healing process. And the pizza and the pizza. I mean, the pizza can't be good for your cholesterol.

Lisa [00:45:39]:
So But pizza, that's accidental. Right? Because she's stoned and now she's hungry. Right? Okay. We've all had too much to drink and needed a slice of pizza before.

Samantha [00:45:48]:
Right? Yes.

Lisa [00:45:49]:
So I get it. I get it. Dear Macy.

Samantha [00:45:53]:
Macy, we're not in judgment. We're just wondering why.

Lisa [00:45:56]:
I might be in judgment. I was okay till I heard the cocaine. Right? It's like you just took everything medicinal in college, like, and made it bad by throwing it cocaine.

Samantha [00:46:07]:
I thought cocaine was so 19 eighties, like, or 19 maybe in the nineties probably.

Lisa [00:46:12]:
When did you become like Miami Vice and, like, you're just like the drug lord of that cocoon? Like, no, no, no, no. It's it's hard rock cocaine that's popular now. Not just cocaine. We don't snort in 2024.

Samantha [00:46:26]:
I'm just saying. If you're

Lisa [00:46:28]:
a coke head, you're licking that shit off anything that it's on. Okay. I agree.

Samantha [00:46:32]:
But I just feel like there's so many other versions of drugs that can be taken. Cocaine seems like old school, like way, way, way back old school.

Lisa [00:46:41]:
Right. Right. So where's heroin fit in? Right? LSD?

Samantha [00:46:46]:
Like nobody's talking about LSD anymore.

Lisa [00:46:48]:
Right? You're if you're at the party doing LSD, you're the loser. If you're at the house party and you bring out the kitchen knife and you're doing hot knives on the stove, you took a wrong turn because you're in the 80s party right now.

Samantha [00:47:01]:
You are in the eighties party.

Lisa [00:47:02]:
Not with the millennials trying to be cool. No. No. That's funny. K. So you're watching the Olympics?

Samantha [00:47:11]:
It's Olympic time. Maybe occasionally a highlight?

Lisa [00:47:15]:
Okay, so I'm in it to win it, of course, right? Because I love sports. I love sports. I love sports. I know. I know. But I've decided that if I could become an Olympian, I know what sport I would I would excel at for sure, and I don't think it's very hard. Oh, skateboarding. The people winning

Samantha [00:47:35]:
the gold medals are 15 years old. You are 55. And can you ride a skateboard?

Lisa [00:47:43]:
I don't know. Did you

Samantha [00:47:44]:
do that as a young person? I had a skateboard. Did you actually use it?

Lisa [00:47:50]:
I could put one foot and, like, scoot. I could scoot.

Samantha [00:47:53]:
I could scoot on my skateboard. I think they're doing more than scooting.

Lisa [00:47:57]:
Well, those tricks weren't around when we were skateboarding. We could only just skateboard.

Samantha [00:48:01]:
I feel like you would not have done well.

Lisa [00:48:05]:
I don't know. Hi. 15 year old Lisa might have been a really good skateboarder.

Samantha [00:48:10]:
I have a hard time believing that.

Lisa [00:48:12]:
Always just gotta squash my hopes and dreams.

Samantha [00:48:14]:
You know what? I I need to because I don't need you buying a skateboard now at the age of 55 and trying to figure out if you can go to the Olympics in 4 years. Right. I don't need that. I don't need that on my conscience. I really, really don't.

Lisa [00:48:27]:
I have my helmet. I have my wrist pads. Right?

Samantha [00:48:32]:
Right? I already have I already have roller blades. Who's gonna be your sponsor?

Lisa [00:48:38]:
I don't know. Maybe I Shake My Head will be my sponsor.

Samantha [00:48:41]:
No. I feel like it's gonna be, like, a fiber supplement or something, like Right? Maybe 51. Like, relaxing or I don't know. Raisin Bran. Raisin Bran. Grape Nuts. Grape Nuts. That's even better.

Samantha [00:48:54]:
Let's put you out of the cereal box.

Lisa [00:48:56]:
Right? And if I win the medal, then I get, like, the Grape Nuts cereal box. Right? Champion. Right here.

Samantha [00:49:03]:
I feel like this is a bad idea. I need you to stop thinking that you're an Olympian.

Lisa [00:49:07]:
I just think it's not that hard.

Samantha [00:49:09]:
No. Because, I mean, if you're really gonna get excited about something, you should get excited about that horse that does, like, I'm not doing that. It's the fancy horse stuff.

Lisa [00:49:18]:
I don't wanna be on a fancy horse.

Samantha [00:49:19]:
He's called Rave Rave Horse or something? I don't know. Do you know he dances to, like

Lisa [00:49:23]:
He dances breakdancing in the Olympics too this year.

Samantha [00:49:26]:
Oh, is it?

Lisa [00:49:27]:
Oh, right. Okay. Hip hop. Sam could do that, couldn't she?

Samantha [00:49:30]:
Oh, I would love to watch that.

Lisa [00:49:32]:
You knew this, Friends of the Podcast, back

Samantha [00:49:34]:
in the hip hop club. I did not. I did not. You didn't go to her recital. No, I didn't go to my recital.

Lisa [00:49:41]:
You thought you were gonna come to your recital and Yes. I know.

Samantha [00:49:43]:
And that's why You're like,

Lisa [00:49:44]:
I quit.

Samantha [00:49:45]:
That's why I quit. That's why I quit. That is fine. The threat of embarrassment made me quit.

Lisa [00:49:51]:
We just wanted to lend our support.

Samantha [00:49:53]:
You know what? It doesn't feel like support when people mock you.

Lisa [00:49:56]:
It was gonna be support.

Samantha [00:49:58]:
I think this is a lesson that you need to learn is that when you do that, that's called mocking. It was mocking.

Lisa [00:50:03]:
I wanted Yeah. To support you in your hip hop

Samantha [00:50:06]:
That was not supporting. That was mocking.

Lisa [00:50:09]:
That was mocking. Yeah. I appreciated your hip hop journey. Uh-huh. That's all I'm saying. Yeah. Okeydoke.

Samantha [00:50:20]:
Go get your skateboard and break a leg. Right? Now I don't care. Now I don't care. Now I don't care. But you know what I care about?

Lisa [00:50:29]:
Canadian women's soccer. Oh, touchy subject.

Samantha [00:50:33]:
They got a scandal.

Lisa [00:50:35]:
They got a scandal. Canada's not supposed to go in with the scandal.

Samantha [00:50:38]:
No. They're not. We are not those people.

Lisa [00:50:40]:
We're not those people.

Samantha [00:50:41]:
Apparently, we are. Apparently, we are, though.

Lisa [00:50:43]:
Apparently, we are. Apparently, we are just as crooked and sneaky as the next country.

Samantha [00:50:47]:
Well, when you send in drones to, like, spy on other teams

Lisa [00:50:51]:
And here's what's funny. Right? So you send in a drone thinking you're getting, like, top secret information yet the drone is not undercover.

Samantha [00:51:00]:
Everybody can see it. Everybody can see that

Lisa [00:51:02]:
something's what's over the soccer pitch? Why is that drone flying over the soccer? Probably has a little Canadian flag on it. I bet we didn't we probably didn't even think it out.

Samantha [00:51:12]:
Probably not.

Lisa [00:51:12]:
Right? When really that coach could have just gone to the YouTube and probably watched all the games. Probably.

Samantha [00:51:18]:
Yep. It's sad. It's stupid. But all the didn't all the coaches go?

Lisa [00:51:24]:
Well, yeah. But not all. But only one coach got I think only like the head coach got suspended. Maybe another coach got something. Right? But now, right, they took 6 points away from the Canadian team. Right? So but Because of that? Yeah. Because that's their penalty. But now they have to win one game and then they're in they move into the, I think, the medal rounds or the quarterfinals, right?

Samantha [00:51:46]:
Because they've won all their games

Lisa [00:51:47]:
so far.

Samantha [00:51:48]:
Good for them.

Lisa [00:51:49]:
But my dear world, as a Canadian, we're sorry.

Samantha [00:51:53]:
Yeah. Women's rugby won silver.

Lisa [00:51:55]:
We saw that. Right? That's cool. That's pretty cool. Right? That's pretty cool.

Samantha [00:52:00]:
You're kicking butt.

Lisa [00:52:02]:
Totally kicking butt. So I figured this is the year you're gonna reinvest in the voice. He's in 26, Samantha. 2 out of

Samantha [00:52:12]:
the 4. It's pretty good. Michael Buble,

Lisa [00:52:16]:
Reba, and Gwen.

Samantha [00:52:18]:
Okay. So I don't mind Reba and Gwen. Don't get me wrong. But Michael Buble, he's my boy.

Lisa [00:52:24]:
I would take Snoop Dogg then. And I

Samantha [00:52:26]:
love Snoop Dogg. You know how much I love him.

Lisa [00:52:28]:
You don't get both. You get your pick.

Samantha [00:52:29]:
No. I have taken Snoop and I'm taking Michael. You don't get both? No. I get both. That's not

Lisa [00:52:34]:
how we play. We play or you pick up both?

Samantha [00:52:36]:
No. I don't get both.

Lisa [00:52:37]:
We only get both.

Samantha [00:52:38]:
I am team Snoop Mike.

Lisa [00:52:40]:
You're not Michael. You are you're you're you're team 1 or the other.

Samantha [00:52:44]:
No, I want both.

Lisa [00:52:45]:
Uh-uh. You've probably got to the fall to decide but uh-uh.

Samantha [00:52:48]:
You don't get both? No. No. I get both.

Lisa [00:52:51]:
Michelle's gonna want 1 and I'm gonna want 1.

Samantha [00:52:52]:
Michelle will not play with us.

Lisa [00:52:54]:
She but she watches all that shit. Right? Uh-huh.

Samantha [00:52:57]:
I can't wait till Snoop Dogg, like, starts, like, working with the people he's picked. Right? Well, that's wait for that.

Lisa [00:53:05]:
That's my team, team Lisa.

Samantha [00:53:07]:
That's so fun.

Lisa [00:53:08]:
Team Lisa.

Samantha [00:53:10]:
No. Snoop Dogg is mine.

Lisa [00:53:12]:
Then I have to I have never taken to my team Michael Buble because I hate him.

Samantha [00:53:16]:
And that's why I want team Michael as both.

Lisa [00:53:17]:
You can't have both. You can take Quinn. I don't like this greedy Sam. Let's give Reba to Yeah. She's very greedy.

Samantha [00:53:25]:
Let's give Reba to Michelle.

Lisa [00:53:27]:
Michelle can have Reba. I don't I I get to pick who I wanna pick.

Samantha [00:53:31]:
Are you kidding? You know that Snoop Dogg's gonna be high through the whole thing. It's gonna be awesome to watch. Yeah.

Lisa [00:53:36]:
Well, he's gonna be my guy. So right? You're you're a boot player. No. Yes. If Anne Murray was on there, I'd be team Anne Murray.

Samantha [00:53:47]:
Anne Murray is never doing that.

Lisa [00:53:49]:
I know because she doesn't need to.

Samantha [00:53:51]:
No. Because she's retired and playing golf.

Lisa [00:53:53]:
Yeah. Because that's what happens when you're successful and you retire. You play golf. Right? We will

Samantha [00:53:59]:
we will discuss this further.

Lisa [00:54:01]:
We will once we get closer to the time. Uh-huh. Kiss my butt. I was just giving you a teaser. I didn't think we're gonna have an all out fight about it.

Samantha [00:54:08]:
Yeah. Well, you know what? People on Facebook, they didn't like you.

Lisa [00:54:12]:
They didn't like though. They are not me. I did not Not me.

Samantha [00:54:18]:
Corn dogs, that's you.

Lisa [00:54:19]:
People hated corn dogs. And Maria. I put corn dogs on because I'm always accused of not putting on my favorite.

Samantha [00:54:28]:
You are not a team player.

Lisa [00:54:30]:
I I played for the team, and I put the corn dog on.

Samantha [00:54:34]:
I know. I know. I know. Right?

Lisa [00:54:36]:
But you're right. They didn't love that. But they also didn't love the Oreo. No.

Samantha [00:54:40]:
I wouldn't eat Oreo either.

Lisa [00:54:43]:
Right? Nothing. Like Stephanie, friend of the podcast, she said deep fried Oreos. As much as I love the Oreos, just the sound of them makes my chest hurt. It's a bit too much for me.

Samantha [00:54:53]:
It's an instant heart attack.

Lisa [00:54:54]:
Oh my god. Right? Thou shall not eat a deep fried Oreo.

Samantha [00:54:58]:
Sounds like a bad idea.

Lisa [00:54:59]:
There's just so many better things you can deep fry.

Samantha [00:55:02]:
Right? And then Cindy said, I will not pay $15 for a taco in a bag and you should not.

Lisa [00:55:08]:
I don't understand taco in a bag. Neither do I. Like, a little opening with my hand and, oh, I agree. That would be my one that I'd get rid of the most.

Samantha [00:55:18]:
You're not eating with your hand, you knob. You're eating it with a fork. I'm not eating it. Okay. Not eating it.

Lisa [00:55:24]:
I don't like taco in a bag.

Samantha [00:55:26]:
Nobody likes snow cones either.

Lisa [00:55:28]:
Yeah. But somebody suggested to put vodka in them. I think it was Jamie Thurman. I think Jamie Thurman said that. I'm like, yeah. Different. You go, girl. Next summer's game, snow cones.

Lisa [00:55:41]:
Right? K. But here was something kinda cool. So that was kinda fun. Right? And Mhmm. Thankfully, because of my one has to go issue last night, there's lots of one has to go's in the bank.

Samantha [00:55:52]:
Oh my god.

Lisa [00:55:53]:
Which is good. Right? Which is good. K. So as everybody knows, we have a new website up. Yes. We got a lovely message from Tabitha. Tabitha. Tabitha.

Lisa [00:56:06]:
She sent us a message saying that she appreciated us. She doesn't know who's funnier, us or The Osbournes.

Samantha [00:56:14]:
Oh, good company.

Lisa [00:56:16]:
I know, right? We're in good company, Smashbox. But what she was doing is she was sharing a new item. She has a nice shake my head. There's a we we probably were talking about being hot and stuff like that. Right? There's a gadget on Amazon that Tabitha wanted to share with us, and it's called the Jewel Cooler. Everybody needs to Google it and look it up because you gotta see it. What it is is it cools men's balls. It's a hose that hooks up in your car and air conditions their nuts.

Lisa [00:56:46]:
It's awesome. So awesome. Right?

Samantha [00:56:52]:
Oh, my god. Perfect. When I saw that, I'm like It's perfect.

Lisa [00:56:56]:
Because you can picture because you can actually picture every man in your life sitting in the front seat of the car with his legs apart and that thing attached blowing air at his nuts. Right? Oh, sweaty balls. Sweaty how to fix your sweaty balls. Now if they just made one for women, not for our balls though.

Samantha [00:57:20]:
I I need a cooler for my cooch. Right?

Lisa [00:57:23]:
A cooch a coochy cooler. I need a coochy cooch. Now we're looking for Amazon to develop a coochy cooler.

Samantha [00:57:29]:
If you could just figure that out, that would be just

Lisa [00:57:32]:
because poor Samantha's heartbroken. She found out that naughty knickers is a fraud.

Samantha [00:57:36]:
It's a fraud scam. I'm so I can't order nothing. Nope. I was going to. I was gonna be like, you know, challenge accepted. I will try your cuchi panties. It makes

Lisa [00:57:47]:
sense because every time I went to the website, I kept getting, like, porn panties and I'm like, this is what she's looking for, porn panties? And you're like, I wanna talk about it again. Okay. Your porn panties.

Samantha [00:57:58]:
No. No. But we we found we found out that it was a scam. So I will not be ordering from Naughty Neckers. Yes.

Lisa [00:58:06]:
Or we will not be asking them to endorse the podcast.

Samantha [00:58:08]:
No. No. But I would I would I potentially could invest in the cooler, the coochie cooler. Coochie filler. Totally.

Lisa [00:58:17]:
Right? Yeah. Take the the coochie cooler.

Samantha [00:58:20]:
Right? So friends with a podcast, if one of you isn't really, you know, an inventor of things

Lisa [00:58:24]:
Right.

Samantha [00:58:25]:
We've given you the idea. We only ask that you give us 50% of

Lisa [00:58:28]:
the 50%. It's being patented and trademarked by the judge right now as we speak. I secretly texted him.

Samantha [00:58:40]:
Oh, god. Thank you, Tabitha. That was great, and thank you for the message. And, again, guys, hey, you know what? Connect with us on our many social platforms. You can check out our website which is www.ishakemyheadpaw.com and sign up for our newsletters. Check out our blog. Leave us a message or a voice mail, and stay to listen to any of our episodes. It's all right there.

Samantha [00:59:00]:
It's all right there. YouTube is there. All the connections to all of our socials are on that website as well. It's a one stop shop for you guys. And, you know, emails like this is what we we really enjoy. When I got that, I laughed so hard. It was awesome. Yeah.

Samantha [00:59:16]:
So it really brightens our day when you reach out. So just think of that, and we reach out right back. We reply. We promise. Totally. Yeah. So if you wanna check out our videos, you can go to their YouTube page and subscribe to get notified of a new episode. I believe we have a 101 people listed.

Samantha [00:59:34]:
We do.

Lisa [00:59:35]:
We don't know who the 101 person was, so we can't give them a shout out.

Samantha [00:59:39]:
No. We don't know that. But thank you for whoever decided to be get us over the threshold. Right?

Lisa [00:59:44]:
Where are we going?

Samantha [00:59:45]:
Higher. Higher. We do have Patreon, which is www.patron.com/ishakemyhead. For as little as $2 a month, you get the episode early, an extra episode every month, and our content has been videos lately. So if you wanna watch us do some extra content video, I don't know. You might wanna become a Patreon. You wanna

Lisa [01:00:05]:
join and we're revamping it, so there's gonna be fun stuff coming.

Samantha [01:00:09]:
Yeah. And, also, again, guys, you can go to threadless, which is isishakemyhead.threadless.com and check out our swag. We do have our new logo up there. So if you want a new I shake my head t shirt, check it out. Check it out. Check it out. Check it out. We wanna say thank you to John Domingo for putting together all of our stuff every week.

Samantha [01:00:28]:
He does a great job and we really appreciate it.

Lisa [01:00:30]:
Thank you, John. And breaking news, friends of the podcast, Samantha has officially joined the ESPN

Samantha [01:00:37]:
football team lead. I can't wait. But you know what the problem is? I don't have a sports channel.

Lisa [01:00:45]:
I'm not helping her because she's my competition.

Samantha [01:00:48]:
I know. And he asked me if you would help me and I'm like, no.

Lisa [01:00:51]:
She said

Samantha [01:00:51]:
I was a competition. He's like, oh. I'm like, I'll figure it out.

Lisa [01:00:54]:
You better talk to your father. That's what I

Samantha [01:00:57]:
said I have talked to.

Lisa [01:00:59]:
Right? You're gonna have to or your brother or something. I'm not helping you. Yeah. Yeah. For sure. I fly solo.

Samantha [01:01:04]:
If you can figure it out, I feel like I can figure it out.

Lisa [01:01:07]:
Yeah. Well, you don't know anything about sports, so that's not gonna help.

Samantha [01:01:11]:
I don't know. I've done pretty well watching the few Blue Jays games. You have

Lisa [01:01:16]:
watched them.

Samantha [01:01:17]:
I already told you they needed to keep Porky and they did.

Lisa [01:01:21]:
Because they had nobody else. They traded their other catcher, Samantha.

Samantha [01:01:24]:
Stop it. Oh my gosh. What were they doing?

Lisa [01:01:27]:
They're they're they're shuffling it up. They're mixing it up. They're mixing it up. But our football draw is on Saturday. What is that?

Samantha [01:01:34]:
Oh, is it? Yeah. This Saturday?

Lisa [01:01:37]:
I think it's this Saturday.

Samantha [01:01:38]:
Oh, I'm so not prepared.

Lisa [01:01:39]:
Or is it next month? I don't know. I don't know. I have to double check. I'm not You better double check. Double check.

Samantha [01:01:45]:
I'm not

Lisa [01:01:45]:
telling you. I'm not starting

Samantha [01:01:46]:
right away. Calm down. I know, but I won't be telling you. I feel like you're gonna be this person who's, like, totally always needling me.

Lisa [01:01:54]:
I won't. I don't care what you do.

Samantha [01:01:55]:
I'll And then I will become the person who seeks for revenge.

Lisa [01:01:59]:
Well, I know. But, guess what? You don't scare me. You don't scare me. Right? I'm team bring it.

Samantha [01:02:08]:
And I'll be team okay.

Lisa [01:02:12]:
Right? So nobody else might as well even play the football pool. It should just be Lisa and Sam.

Samantha [01:02:17]:
Everybody else, fuck off.

Lisa [01:02:19]:
Right? Exactly a cool trick too. We got this. We got this one this year, John.

Samantha [01:02:26]:
Oh my god. I think he's invited a whole whack of bad things.

Lisa [01:02:30]:
Good. Good.

Samantha [01:02:31]:
Asking all by both of us to join. Right. Right.

Lisa [01:02:36]:
So It's gonna be as divine. Alright, Samantha. Anything else you wanna add? No. I'm all good. I'm better. Alright. Every time. Put the line in the sinker.

Lisa [01:02:47]:
Friends of the podcast, have Who's a pretty girl? I'm a pretty girl.